*gulp*

Alright. It's time.
I want...
To publish a short story.

The story in question can be found here: "We Can Make Your Dreams Come True." - Writing Forums (http://www.writingforums.org/showthread.php?t=3864)

It's a sci-fi-ish kind of thing that starts out aiming for witty, and ends with chilling (At least, I like to think of it like that), like Twilight Zone with Bipolar Syndrome. It's 4,000-something words long and about eight pages on MS Word, default font.
So the questions I have for you are this:

1) Where do you think I could get this published?
1a. Is this a place that just puts up stuff written by teens (Keep in mind that I'm 13), or actually pays them for it?
1b. Is this an online site or magazine or something else?

2) Do you think I could honestly get this published? Be frank, people. Does this story really have the clout to be put out there into the public eye, possibly and very hopefully for an actual payment? Or does it need extreme reworking or, at that, total abandonment?

Please help, this is a very serious idea for me and I don't want to say I didn't try. (Besides, my author hero Terry Pratchett got his first story published at the age of 13, which means I need to make my move quickly to keep up!)

Thanks so much in advance for your helpful responses. I'm really hoping this forum can come through for me. It's a really big move in my eyes. Thanks!

-Ivan

I don't think it needs massive changing, but I would really take a look at some of the marathon sentences, abd try to break them up. Basically, I think if you proofread it aloud, you'll be able to find and fix the more awkward passages.

I like the story, but the ending did not come as a surprise to me. Andrea seemed a bit too knowledgeable. If she appeared more like another person caught up in the dream machine, it might come as more of a surprise ending. Just a thought...

I have no publishing experience, so I cannot help on the nuts and bolts part of your question. I wish you the best luck, though!

With a little more polish, yes, I see that as publishable. Unless your parents last name's are Paolini, you're gonna have a hulluva time, though. Pm mamamaia, she might be abke to help on this....

I've read the story, and I'm pretty sure that a semi-pro to pro magazine would publish it. Though you'll have a hard time with determining the genre.

Oh and one more thing, you might want to delete the story from this forum. Most magazines will treat your story as being 'published' if its on this website.

Gawtcha. I'll ask a mod to delete it once I've figured out where I want to send this thing.
Which reminds me: Thank you all for answering my second question, but could someone get around to actually showing me where to send it?
I'll try asking mammamaia, but in case that doesn't work, and since I can't get at an e-mail thingy of my own any time soon (Busted computer), I'd like someone to help me out.
So...any ideas?

1) Where do you think I could get this published?

...in any magazine that takes stories like yours...

1a. Is this a place that just puts up stuff written by teens (Keep in mind that I'm 13), or actually pays them for it?

...first of all, no one knows or cares how old the writer is, if the story is marketable... secondly, if your work is good enough, you might find a taker among paying teen or adult markets or freebies... depends on what you want... do you want just to see it in print, or to be paid for it and be able to honestly claim you're a 'published author'?...

1b. Is this an online site or magazine or something else?

...could be any of the above...

2) Do you think I could honestly get this published? Be frank, people. Does this story really have the clout to be put out there into the public eye, possibly and very hopefully for an actual payment? Or does it need extreme reworking or, at that, total abandonment?

...can't say, as i haven't read it... if you want a frank assessment of its chances, you can send it to me, along with a brief synopsis...

could someone get around to actually showing me where to send it?

...go here [ Duotrope's Digest (Markets for Writers) (www.duotrope.com) ] and take your pick!...

I'll try asking mammamaia, but in case that doesn't work, and since I can't get at an e-mail thingy of my own any time soon (Busted computer), I'd like someone to help me out.

...i'm here, babycakes!... email me if you need more info...

love and hugs, mm
maia3maia@hotmail.com

ps:... sashas is right... you can't sell 'first rights' if it's out there on the net for all to read for free!... in future,never post a complete work, if you want to sell it later...

Just do as mamamaia says, go search on Duotrope. Look under the 'cross genre' category. You might also want to look only for magazines that take electronic submissions only, since that will save you all the postage and printing. There are many many magazine that will take your stuff.

Alright, so I've decided to use this site, which seemed to fit all the qualities:
susurrus: the literature of madness eVol: three Issue: one June 2007 (http://www.susurrusmagazine.com/)

...and am going to e-mail them soon with my submission.
I want to know, though: What should I put in the e-mail header?

Make sure that you submit to atleast 8-10 magazines.
Trust me, even if your piece is exceptional, many magazines wont accept it the first time around. Sending it to just one magazine gives you just 1% chance of getting it in print.
Check out this one:
Greatest Uncommon Denominator Magazine: dibs (http://www.gudmagazine.com/subs/dibs.php)

gives you just 1% chance of getting it in print

or less!

sashas is right... it's silly to send to just one, unless the one you really, really want to hook has a no sim-subs policy...

I want to know, though: What should I put in the e-mail header?

what's wrong with just 'submission'? ;-)

Kay, it's just that people are always "GUH GET THEIR ATTENTION!" so. Bleh. I'll do that.
And I'll try out Sashas' suggestion. Yes, I realize I 99.99999 repeating won't get published, but what the hey, got to be able to say I tried.

Oh and dont be afraid to aim high for semi-pro to pro magazines.
My recommendation is to submit to 5 magazines with token payments, and 5 magazines with semi-pro to pro payments.

And best of luck!

Kay, it's just that people are always "GUH GET THEIR ATTENTION!" so. Bleh. I'll do that.

K.I.S.S.!... the only thing agents and publishers want you to get their attention with is how good your writing is and how marketable your story//book/article is...

amateurs who use fancy 'attention-getters' will be immediately seen as amateurs and be sent to the bottom of the pile... if you want to be paid like the pros, you gotta act/look like one...