View Full Version : Furthering A Plot


vallanceflux
10-27-2006, 04:59 PM
Prologue

He stood on the outskirts of the barren, solid footing. Beyond a sense of plummeting and the inevitable ground.
A sense; a tingling, not his. He was not alone in this skeleton of flesh. A longing to finish it, “Step, step, step now!”. The voice was forceful. The voice was not his.
His foot moved. Fear. He was no longer in control. Nothing. His foot passed through the level of the previous ground. He was falling.
What was happening? Why was he here? He fell, the sharp slashes on his neck, his face. He fell. What was inside? What was this shared presence?
“Don’t fear me…you long for the end, you long to be free of me.” It spoke again, softer. Almost a whisper. Still retaining the hissed syllables. Accented “S”s. Not human. The words were still spat, regardless of why they were said.
“Come. Come. End this.” Faster, progressing with his falling body, plummeting downwards. Words compressed, barely audible. One stream of sound.
Then it came, the cold hard unforgiving end. Reunited from baser matter from where all originated. It came.

Chapter 1

The call came early, Aaron rolled over. Staring at the red light illuminating symbols: numbers. Memories; thoughts; pains, all came rushing back with stark rapidity. The pulsating rhythm of pain from within his head shrieked in tune with the ring of the phone. “I’m coming! Damn it, can you just wait a second!”. He groggily pulled his weight out of bed and stumbled to the opposite wall and the mounted phone. He lifted the receiver. “Yeh?”
“Aaron Davies?” The voice sounded cold, mechanical and rehearsed.
“Yeh.” His voice was stiff, like the rest of him it had still not woken. Still leaning against the wall he reached for the alarm clock: 4:55am. Two words spun around in his head, “Jesus Christ.”
“I’m afraid I have some bad news.” It spoke again, more like a spoken essay, repeated over and over again till a rhythmic automatic ease took over.
“Can it wait? Have you seen the ****ing time?”
“I’m afraid not Mr Davies. You are not in a rush are you?”
“No, I’m just not quite used to getting up before any hint of light.”
“As I said, I have some bad news. You might want to sit down. I’m afraid as of 3:30am this morning your brother Elijah Davies has been pronounced medically dead. I’m deeply sorry for your loss, I assure you all medic assistance was administered to the best of the abilities of the attending paramedics.”
“****! What happened? Drugs?”
“I’m sorry for asking but, your brother was on drugs?”
“Yeh- yeh, he did most stuff. Got- he got into it real young, it just got worse.”
“No sir, we detected no drugs within his system at the time of death. At the moment it is being regarded as a suicide. Your brother had appeared to throw himself from a cliff, commonly known as the Lizard near Cornwal-“
“What the ****!? No! He- he was on drugs- but- no, he wouldn’t kill himself. Someone else, maybe, but he wouldn’t…” His voice trailed off, replaced by muttering parted with stuttered words.


Im really quite fustrated in not being able to further this and get a feel for the compassion to assist it.

Just wondered what people thought.

IndianaJoan
10-27-2006, 05:13 PM
What genre are u working towards? Plot hashing is fun! Id be happy to help..also my father is a Coroner and I've stood in on many an autopsy :)

vallanceflux
10-27-2006, 05:19 PM
Yeh...Im not entirely sure. I change ideas regularly, even when writing. Plans errode, ideas unfurl. It leaves whats written obselete in light of new insight.

Originally it was going to be the apocolypse, but moving towards a political satire, none of which is represented in that. Then realism, with supernaturnal aspects, kinda displayed in the first bit with internal controling. I still kinda want to stick with the apocolypse theme but move towards the interaction between different countries in the light of an unrevealed enemy. Preferably with the side/main plot of Aaron discovering whats really behind the ensuing chaos: invasion of our world with the supernatural.

As I said it has to have realism elements. Nothing is going to be 1 man fighting through the whole armies of hell etc to restore order, neither it is moving towards salvation from heaven but just this last ditch attempt by humanity to save itself from an enemy indefinatly more powerful.

IndianaJoan
10-27-2006, 05:41 PM
Yeh...Im not entirely sure. I change ideas regularly, even when writing. Plans errode, ideas unfurl. It leaves whats written obselete in light of new insight.

Originally it was going to be the apocolypse, but moving towards a political satire, none of which is represented in that. Then realism, with supernaturnal aspects, kinda displayed in the first bit with internal controling. I still kinda want to stick with the apocolypse theme but move towards the interaction between different countries in the light of an unrevealed enemy. Preferably with the side/main plot of Aaron discovering whats really behind the ensuing chaos: invasion of our world with the supernatural.

As I said it has to have realism elements. Nothing is going to be 1 man fighting through the whole armies of hell etc to restore order, neither it is moving towards salvation from heaven but just this last ditch attempt by humanity to save itself from an enemy indefinatly more powerful.


Well it sounds like you have a fair idea of where you want it to go. My suggestion might be to just keep writing and develop your main character. As you develop your main character, I think you might find that the story will develop itself somewhat. Sometimes I think we get so caught up in plotting that we forget to let our characters plot for us. Sit back, relax and just write and see what your character has to say.

vallanceflux
10-28-2006, 03:49 AM
Hmmm, fair enough. Thanks.