Maniacal Mysteries Untold

These are some NPCs I have created, they have been somewhat introduced already. I honestly don't know if you can freely roleplay a NPC - stupid GM here , but these characters are the ones open for use in roleplay by anyone kinda thing, unlike Francine who is my charrie.

1)
Name: John Francs
Age: 30
Gender: Male

Race: Caucasian
Spiritual beliefs: Atheist

Fighting proficiencies: He's a very muscular man with incomparable strength, and his skills in martial arts go a long way. He also carries a revolver, pack of grenades and sleeping gas with him at all times.
Occupation: Detective

Personality: A vain and somewhat rude man who is great in his job but his personal dealings can be nasty. He is very intelligent, and is bound to know something you couldn't even imagine. He is a pervert, or that's what people say.
Appearance: Wavy black hair with a very fair complexion. His eyes are narrower than usual but they look very intimidating in the face cut. His nose and lips are balanced to, and his body frame is broad and muscular. His height is 6 feet and he weighs 170 pounds.
Biography: Basically no one knows about John's past or present, because it is 'classified' information.

2)
Name: Brenda Stives
Age: 28
Gender: Female

Race: Japanese/Austrian
Spiritual beliefs: Wiccan

Fighting proficiencies: She can punch.
Occupation: Psychiatrist

Personality: A simple, touchy but loving lady who always plays loyal with her colleagues. She is more into her social life than the hospital, but nevertheless she is good in her job.
Appearance: Long, glossy black hair with soft curls. Her complexion is like the moon - very beautiful looking. Her eyes are oceanic blue, which look like pearls in the night. Her height is 5"2' and her weight is about 105 pounds.
Biography: She was at first a model due to her ideal figure and looks, but when her best friend Trixie became a schizophrenic, she decided to study her disease. Once into psychiatry books, she was so fascinated that she joined psychiatry and discontinued modeling. Her parents are divorced and she has never seen her mother. Her father is a polygamous man who keeps changing his girlfriends and sexual partners. She is the only child and has moved far away from Atlanta, where they lived, to New York State just because of her father.

3)
Name: Jerry
Age: 24
Gender: Male

Race: French
Spiritual beliefs: Jew

Fighting proficiencies: Was a boxer in his college days, but nothing much else.
Occupation: Sit-at-home brother

Personality: A lazy and carefree man who is yet to understand the demands of life. He spends most of his time watching TV and partying with his neighbors, despite his sister's insistence that he should find himself a job. He's pretty rude and uncompromising, sometimes which makes his sister very upset.
Appearance: Brown dry hair with a fairly darker complexion than his sister. He has dull blue eyes which seem to give an effect of dirty green from far. He's a bit overweight, which doesn't help his overall unappealing look. His height is 5"8'.
Biography: Unlike his sister Francine, Jerry was a careless and partying young lad who barely passed high school. Though he worked very hard for graphic design, his irresponsible attitude did not let it survive as a career and he immediately turned to his sister for funds. Now he lives a retarded life with his sister.

Here's a map of the mental asylum in 'Out of Their Minds' RPG. Updated with a neater, cuter and much readable one. I love you sister!

http://i9.photobucket.com/albums/a69/rowzez92/MAPFINAL.jpg

Here's the list of the characters and some important information in 'Out of Their Minds' RPG.

1. Adrian Gutierrez
   • Player: Mousie
   • Gender: M
   • Age: 17
   • Disorder (Intensity): Nacrolepsy (4)
2. Ambriel McSean
   • Player: ChimmyBear
   • Gender: F
   • Age: 32
   • Disorder (Intensity): Paranoia (5), Nightmare Disorder (5)
3. Benjamin Jericho
   • Player: BrinkOfDawn
   • Gender: M
   • Age: 29
   • Disorder (Intensity): Schizophrenia (10), Mania (10) and Insomnia (10)
4. Edna Travis
   • Player: Salinye
   • Gender: F
   • Age: 28
   • Disorder (Intensity): Paranoid Delusion bordering on Schizophrenia (10)
5. Glenny Ramses
   • Player: Marloy
   • Gender: M
   • Age: 19
   • Disorder (Intensity): Schizophrenia (2), Delusional Disorder (3)
6. Gregor Handel
   • Player: Rumpole40k
   • Gender:M
   • Age: 37
   • Disorder (Intensity): Delusional Disorder (9)
7. Kevin Michaels
   • Player: starsailor
   • Gender:M
   • Age: 29
   • Disorder (Intensity): OCD (10), Autism (9)
8. Lamia Sachdeva
   • Player: Neha
   • Gender: F
   • Age: 19
   • Disorder (Intensity): MPD (8)
9. Larnor Brooks
   • Player: Time_Froze
   • Gender:M
   • Age: 30
   • Disorder (Intensity): OCD (9), Nightmare Disorder (9)
10. Lomac, Deric A.
    • Player: Nezriel
    • Gender: M
    • Age: 25
    • Disorder (Intensity): Sleep terrors (5), Oneirophrenia (7), Schizophrenia (8)
11. Michael Bowers
    • Player: GuitarSolo
    • Gender: M
    • Age: 22
    • Disorder (Intensity): Antisocial Personality Disorder (9)
12. Mortimer Robinson
    • Player: ValianceInEnd
    • Gender: M
    • Age: 38
    • Disorder (Intensity): Schizophrenic Disorder (10)
13. Nicholas Arcane
    • Player: Kratos
    • Gender: M
    • Age: 20
    • Disorder (Intensity): MPD (8), Pedophilia (8)
14. Niel Charon
    • Player: Shadow Dragon
    • Gender: M
    • Age: 20
    • Disorder (Intensity): MPD (5)
15. Noah Haze
    • Player: Klee
    • Gender: M
    • Age: 22
    • Disorder (Intensity): Depression (5), Schizophrenia (6)
16. Olena Airye
    • Player: Iulia
    • Gender: F
    • Age: 16
    • Disorder (Intensity): MPD (7) and Bipolar (7)
17. Rory Olson
    • Player: Mousie
    • Gender:M
    • Age: 13
    • Disorder (Intensity): Borderline Personality Disorder (3)
18. Skye
    • Player: Bick
    • Gender: F
    • Age: 11
    • Disorder (Intensity): OCD (9), Insomnia (9), Tourette's syndrome (9)

This is a short article adopting a question-answer pattern to explain the concept of veil in Islam. For those who avoid religious discussions, let me just say that this is no longer a religious issue. it has become a social, political and economic crisis, which can only be solved through the individual understanding of Islam and its values. It is important for people to learn to differentiate between the message of media and the message of Allah, in order to construct harmonious relations between Muslims and Non-Muslims, with Islam being the fastest growing religion in the world.

What is hijab?

The word "hijab" comes from the Arabic word "hajaba" meaning to hide from view or conceal. In today's world, it means the veil worn by Muslim women.

However, it is important to note that the concept of hijab is not limited to the covering of body parts. It relates to covering all parts of the human intelligence which can be polluted by evil. For instance, there is hijab of the eye (protecting oneself from seeing evil), hijab of the mouth (refraining from saying wrong, lies, slandering, backbiting, etc), hijab of the ears (protecting oneself from listening to evil such as profanities) and hijab of the heart/soul (protecting oneself from imagining and thinking ill and wrong). In this regard, Muslim men and women both are to wear hijab, but physical hijab is different for both genders keeping in view their needs and responsibilities in the Muslim society.

For a Muslim man, the awrah (i.e. the body parts which should remain covered) is from the navel to the knee. He cannot expose his awrah to any woman or man save his wife.

For a Muslim woman, the awrah is the entire body except the hands up to the wrists and the face (there is dissent in this regard, some say the mouth should also be covered, but regardless of the fact a woman may cover her mouth or not, as she wishes).

The dress should meet five other criteria (for both sexes): 2) It should not be so glamorous as to attract the opposite sex, 3) It should not be so tight fitting that it reveals the figure, 4) It should not be transparent so that one can see the body parts that are to be covered, 5) It should not resemble the dress of the opposite sex and 6) it should not resemble the dress of the Non-Muslims.

The entire subject is summarized eloquently in the following two verses:
"Say to the believing men that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty: that will make for greater purity for them: And Allah is well acquainted with all that they do.
And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty; that they should not display their beauty and ornaments except what (must ordinarily) appear thereof; that they should draw their veils over their bosoms and not display their beauty except to their husbands, their fathers, their husband's fathers, their sons, their husbands' sons, their brothers or their brothers' sons, or their sisters' sons, or their women, or the slaves whom their right hands possess, or male servants free of physical needs, or small children who have no sense of the shame of sex; and that they should not strike their feet in order to draw attention to their hidden ornaments. And O ye Believers! turn ye all together towards Allah, that ye may attain Bliss." (Chapter 24, Verses 30 and 31)

Those exempted from the limits of hijab are still not free to see any part of the female's body.
The limitations increase in ascending order i.e. the husband is free to see any part of the woman, while the father and following persons are not to be treated in this way. Muslim women are to cover their heads and bosoms for the following list of men, with the magnitude of ornaments and beautification decreasing as the subjects proceed.

In case of close females, the awrah is from the navel to knee.

Why has hijab been enforced on the Muslim women?

The Quran answers the question directly and briefly in the following words:
"O Prophet! Tell thy wives and daughters, and the believing women, that they should cast their outer garments over their persons (when abroad): that is most convenient, that they should be known (as such) and not molested. And Allah is Oft- Forgiving, Most Merciful." (Chapter 33, Verse 59)

The two main reasons for the obligation of hijab are 1)They should be known/recognized as Muslim women, like the distinguishing mark for Muslim men is beard, 2)They would be safe from molestation. To prove the second reason, I'll take the example of USA. According to a FBI report, in the year 1990, every day on an average 1756 cases of rape were committed in USA alone. Later another report said that on an average everyday 1900 cases of rapes are committed in USA. The year was not mentioned. Similar figures have been reported by the US
Department of Justice. It is not a surprise that the rape rate is highest in USA. But if one plays with logic, if all women in USA started wearing hijab, would the rape rate increase or decrease? Is lewd dressing going to encourage a man to tease a woman, or otherwise? Tackle with common sense, friends.

It is for this marked reason, why hijab is enforced on women.

Why is hijab compulsory, why not an option like for nuns?

Following rules is not an option, and maintaining peace is not an option. Since hijab is a law for maintaining peace, it is in turn not an option. It is foolish to give me an option to get raped and not get raped, provided all other conditions are equal. Every women who is a Muslim is supposed to wear hijab, it is a social reform which requires attendance.

Why is hijab a symbol of subjugation and oppression?

That is because of the media and misrepresentation of islam by certain Muslims themselves.

The Quran and the Sunnah (life of the Prophet [PBUH]) do not promote subjugation through hijab, but freedom. It is important to note why women wear dresses which attract attention. It may be for these reasons:

1) To get praised, grab attention. Islam refutes extravagance and show off, and attempting to gain praise is an evil in Islam.

2) To get the opposite sex to be attracted to you, thus finding a spouse. Islam considers the physical and sexual value of companionship as the lowest priority, so where western women have their first impression as their beauty and make-up talents, Muslim women have it as their intelligence and character, which is more important in any association.

3) For self-satisfaction. If someone dresses up to be satisfied, then it is a sign that he/she does not recognize Allah's love for His creatures. One should be happy with his/her beauty, because Allah knows and wants best for us.

Thus, hijab is not subjugation, it is liberation. Nowadays women are mere statues of beauty and sexual attraction. Islam nullifies such importance and values the intelligence and character instead, which everyone can attain.

Do you wear hijab?

Yes.

I'm offended!!!

I'm deeply sorry, that was not my intention.

I have to debate on this.

PM or comments are welcome.

For an online Quran, refer to www.searchtruth.com
For a detailed and alternative explanation on this topic, refer to http://www.peacetv.in/faq01.php (Question 3)

Finally! Holidays.

Yup. Holidays.

It sounds so soothing to the ears.

CAUSE IT FOR 3 MONTHS! 90 days of joy, bliss and self-improvement. We have all the time for learning stuff, having fun and most importantly - writing!

I'm very busy ATM, since I'm cleaning my room and lounge which is quite a project! But once it's done I'll be at rest so I'm aiming to drive myself crazy cleaning it up. But here's a general overview of my plans for summer.

- Enjoy internet
- Watch movies/cartoons
- Write my novel and complete it
- Give a final edit to my other novel and try to find a suitable agent
- Record my songs
- Learn Arabic
- Revise my entire course of past two years, including summer school
- Swimming for a month
- Lose a couple of kilograms
- Contribute to the household chores
- Learn to cook some fancy stuff
- Improve my relations with my family (which I would, if I'd do everything above )
- Promote my religion, study it and spread the knowledge
- Beautify myself (lol)
- Keep contact with my friends
- Last but not the least...
PROMISE MYSELF TO LIVE A CONSTRUCTIVE SUMMER VACATION. (Something I've been trying to do for the past 3 years. )

Anyway, I should get back to work. HURRAAAY!!!

This is a pretty random realization, but I'm confessing it because it's closely related to the forums.

I feel so guilty today. I don't know why. I log on to the site, see some stuff, and I feel like disabling my account. This is just unfair! Especially because I have no diagnosis of this problem. I can't relate to anything concerning this sudden eruption of hate and guilt.

Then there's my real life. I always believed that my life is a unique one, stable, happy and satisfactory, in which there has never been no doubt. I could never ever start, let alone finish counting the blessings in my life. But maybe the problems one faces is related to mismanagement of one's blessings. Which means that the troubles in my life (big or small) are my fault, which is true and I accept it. But what I can't accept is that there is no way out. No way out at all. And if there is, I can't get there. Sometimes, as if - I am guilty of being born.

I guess I've earned this, but sometimes people act so cold and uncaring towards me. They don't think for a moment before telling me that I'm a whore, slut, prostitute or (censored profanities). I accept it, that I probably am that way - but is that it? I get to be the bad girl, and there's no way I can fix it? I know the way, but I can't seem to find it anymore. I don't want to find it anymore either.

Then these people don't ever forget my bad points. There's not a moment in the day I don't hear the bad points about me - no exaggeration. I eat or not, sleep or not, stand up or not, sit down or not - there's always an issue. Then, when I avoid them and sneak up to do things my way at their backs, there's this mixed feeling of freedom and guilt. I don't want to disobey - but I'm not a slave! I want to be a great person, but I'm still just human. I just really, really, really wish I could either lose my memory, or I could lose my ability to feel. It would be so much better.

Well, this vague and ambiguous confession is over.

My date sheet for exams has been announced. Here's the gist of it. It's going to be tough for me because: I'm not studying and the course is of the total we've studied in two whole years. Not good.

Friday 16th May
Mathematics Paper 1
A 2 hour paper, with sums not needing a calculator. Nothing much, IMO. I'll be studying Biology (all the course for 9th standard) along with Mathematics.

Saturday 17th May
Mathematics Paper 2
A 2.5 hour paper, with sums needing a calculator. I hate the '2.5' hour part. I'll fall asleep! Of course, I'll spend the day before on Mathematics and Biology (all the course remaining for 10th standard).

Monday 19th May
Islam Studies Paper 1 and 2
1 hour 15 minutes, and 1 hour 45 minutes respectively. I feel angry at the fact that we are not properly trained to answer in the time given, neither is the syllabus well-explained. But I hope I'll do okay. I'll spend the Saturday studying some Islam and more biology, and Sunday solely on Islam.

Tuesday 20th May
English Language Paper 1 and 2
1 and 1/2 hour paper each, perfect timing. Of course, I simply don't expect anything above a C because I'm unable to please my teacher with my answers. The Monday will be spent studying History and Biology (if needed).

Wednesday 21st May
Pakistan Studies Paper 1 (History and Culture of Pakistan)
1 and 1/2 hour paper, we're literally on a race against time throughout the exam. But if the answers are on your tips, you can very well ace the exam. The day before I'll study only History, duh.

Thursday 22nd May
Urdu Paper 1
A 2 hour paper, perfect timing. This is the easiest paper one can make - of course, being theoretical it simply repels marks. Wednesday is for studying Biology (if needed) and Chemistry (all course of 9th standard).

Friday 23rd May
Biology Paper 1 and 2
The MCQ paper is 1 hour, which is fine and the theory paper is 2 hours (not sure). Fair enough, I would have been learning Biology for a while now. Nothing but Biology on Thursday.

Saturday 24th May
Biology Paper 4 (alternative to practical)
First time attempting it. Not sure of timing or anything about it. Just a very simple, yet tricky paper as far as I know. I'll spend the previous day studying Biology and Physics (all course of 9th standard).

Monday 26th May
Pakistan Studies Paper 2 (Geography and Economy of Pakistan)
It's also for 1 and 1/2 hour, but it is solvable. The teacher we have it lenient (IMO) which is a short-term advantage and long-term disadvantage. However, Saturday I'll study Geography and Chemistry (all course for 10th standard). Sunday goes to Geography exclusively.

Tuesday 27th May
Chemistry Paper 1 and 2
The MCQ paper is 1 hour, which is fine and the theory paper is 2 hours (not sure). The subject is cursed (thanks to calculations!) otherwise lovin' it. Monday goes to Chemistry, my love.

Wednesday 28th May
Chemistry Paper 4 (alternative to practical)
First time attempting it. Not sure of timing or anything about it. Just a very simple, yet tricky paper as far as I know. I'll spend the previous day studying Chemistry and Physics (all course for 10th standard).

Thursday 29th May
Urdu Paper 2
Yikes! I haven't done a thing. Easy paper, if you know everything! So yeah, the previous day only Urdu, nothing else.

Friday 30th May
Physics Paper 1 and 2
The MCQ paper is 1 hour, which is fine and the theory paper is 2 hours (not sure). I think the subject is cool in the sense that our teacher is great, and I think my concept is good too. Thursday only Physics.

Saturday 31st May
Physics Paper 4 (alternative to practical)
First time attempting it. Not sure of timing or anything about it. Just a very simple, yet tricky paper as far as I know. I'll spend the previous day studying Physics only. This marks the end of our examinations! The Business/Accounting/Economics/Food & Nutrition Students would be done before us, but we'll be done before the Pre-Engineering students so YEAH!

Insha Allah, Insha Allah, Insha Allah [If God wills]! All of this will be possible. I just want all by marks to be near to the highest, or in 90s. That's it. Then, my mother will feel better and so will I. And my summer holidays will be peaceful.

Just something I was trying to find words for. Finally wrote it.

------------​

Just because someone’s different
Does it force you to deny
The humanity, and become belligerent
I just want to know why
Does our heart not cry
When our brothers die?

Why is it ‘you and me’?
Why isn’t it just ‘we’?
Why can’t we all be brothers and sisters?
Whatever our faith may be

Just ‘cause someone has a beard
Means he has to be feared
Isn’t it just a lock of hair
Isn’t it better to be fair
And see what he’s hiding
Is just a glad tiding

Why is it ‘you and me’?
Why isn’t it just ‘we’?
Why can’t we all be brothers and sisters?
Whatever our faith may be

She wears a black veil
Something many feel
Is pressure and subjugation
Instead of this assumption
Why don’t you see, she’s free
For her, her worth’s not her beauty

Why is it ‘you and me’?
Why isn’t it just ‘we’?
Why can’t we all be brothers and sisters?
Whatever our faith may be

They refuse to eat pork, even a slice
For which there is, a heavy price
The drink they never employ
Ruins families and joy
Why curse them for something
Which is better for the living

Why is it ‘you and me’?
Why isn’t it just ‘we’?
Why can’t we all be brothers and sisters?
Whatever our faith may be

I'll keep this blog short. Heh, ain't got no reason to make it long anyway!

I'm getting bored, perhaps a little more than usual, because there's tension and distress backing it up. That would be actually exam anxiety . Moreover, some things round the forum have been stuffy. Good friends of mine have left, kinda makes me feel guilty cause I'm sitting around doing nothing. Nevertheless, the forum is quiet, painfully silent - I wonder why!

I'm just waiting for my RPG to start, it should put off some of this stress. And side by side, I'm hoping a certain someone would return, sure would make me feel better. So yeah, nothing much else to say.

Lol, I'm not drunk. Seriously, I'm a terrorist and extremist. It's as simple as the meaning of the two words.

People use the words interchangeably with 'Muslim'. I'll just say: well yes, I'm a terrorist, I terrorize people. I terrorize the bad guys, cause I'm an active good guy. For the criminals and wrongdoers, I'm a terrorist. Rest of the guys...I'm commanded:
"On that account: We ordained for the Children of Israel that if any one slew a person - unless it be for murder or for spreading mischief in the land - it would be as if he slew the whole people: and if any one saved a life, it would be as if he saved the life of the whole people. Then although there came to them Our messengers with clear signs, yet, even after that, many of them continued to commit excesses in the land." Quran, Chapter 5, Verse 32
So yeah, I'm a terrorist.

Then the idea of extremist. Literally, that's following something in extreme. Well, I do that. (Or at least try to!) I'm extremely honest, extremely kind, extremely helpful, extremely virtuous, and that's fair enough? Eh? So there, I'm an extremist too. But I'm not an extremist in the bad side, because:
"Fight in the cause of Allah those who fight you, but do not transgress limits; for Allah loveth not transgressors." - Quran, Chapter 2, Verse 190
There, I'm an extremist.

Another misconception people have is that Jihad is holy war, or that Islam believes in holy war. Actually, that's not the case. Jihad is an Arabic word which means to 'strive' or to 'struggle'. So literally speaking, a boy who studies real hard for his Chemistry test, is doing Jihad. In Islamic terminology, that would mean 'to strive/struggle in the way of Allah' i.e. Jihad-fi-sabeel-Allah. And that doesn't imply war anywhere, does it? There are FIVE kinds of Jihad in Islam, and they are:
1. Jihad-bin-nafs (Struggle against one's invalid desires)
2. Jihad bil-lisaan (Struggle with one's tongue, to speak out against wrong, especially to speak the truth in front of a tyrant ruler)
3. Jihad-bin-maal (Struggle with one's resources, to help the oppressed and similar)
4. Jihad-bin-kalm (Struggle with one's pen, to spread the truth through one's writing)
5. Jihad-bin-saif (Your favorite, eh? Struggle with one's sword, to fight in the way of Allah)

Moreover, the word 'holy war' doesn't appear in the Quran! You can look it up yourself, here's an online Quran site:
www.searchtruth.com

Thereafter, you should do two things:
1. Call the evil guys of our community militants, cause that we're not.
2. Read up on Islam through the Quran (our holy book) and Sunnah [sayings/life of the Prophet (peace be upon him)] before adjusting yourself to a belief.

So dudes and dudettes, I hope that clears up some of the clutter in your head. For a detail (not very long, trust me) on Islamic rules on warfare, take a look here:
http://www.islamfortoday.com/war.htm

Good day, and Salam (Peace).

I didn't post it in the Review Room because I would want to see people's personalized viewpoint on it (if anyone bothers to give, that is) on it before I post it. It's a bit religious anyway. It's based on the American Muslims after 9/11.

*1st singer*
Let me die
Let me dessicate, my own life
Let it be easy
It's not why
I will consider, my own blood
When it will shower
Love

Better than breathing
If I must receive your hate
Better than living
If I must live a Muslim's fate

Vay-pur-rize
Your feelings before
Uttering words
So none of people
Improvise
Shouting their ugliest
Words

Better than breathing
Better than living
*whisper of another singer* No it's not!

Censor all
The values you knew, of ril-lee-jun
Before they condemn
All your pals
You cannot listen what they say
Unless you've lost your
Senses

Better than breathing
Better than living
*whisper of another singer* No it's not!

Do not pray
Otherwise, you'll be their
Hottest shot
Don't even bother
With your say
You cannot have it
Ever

Better than breathing
If I must receive your hate
Better than living
If I must live a Muslim's fate

*2nd Singer*
No it's not!
It's not, it's not, it's not!

Better than losing
If I preach the truth
Better than dying
If Islam is in your roots

You can do
Whatever you aim
With your soul
Regulating
What of you
Will you say
Allah

Better than losing
If I preach the truth
Better than dying
If Islam is in your roots

*a choir of people sing* Hayya A'lal Falah (Come to success)
*main singer* Be united, stand strong
*a choir of people sing* Hayya A'lal Falah
*main singers* Be united, stand strong

SONGS

1. I know
   • Age: 13
   • Published: No
   • Progress: Completed
   • Speed: Slow
   • Chorus:
     Because I know...*short humming*
     And I know I'm right and I won't stop...*humming*
   • Other: Posted in Review Room.
2. Maybe
   • Age: 13
   • Published: No
   • Progress: Completed
   • Speed: Slow
   • Chorus:
     Maybe *short echo*
     I've never seen
     What you have *short beat*
     Maybe *short echo*
     I could be better off...
     Making friends with you now... *beat*
   • Other: none.
3. Right here, right now
   • Age: 14
   • Published: No
   • Progress: Completed
   • Speed: Medium
   • Chorus:
     Right here right now
     Do you realize?
     Of ALL the things...
     Oh...
   • Other: none.
4. Somewhere near
   • Age: 14
   • Published: No
   • Progress: Completed
   • Speed: Medium
   • Chorus:
     So listen up
     Someone I know
     Someone I care for
     Is somewhere near
     If I could hug her I would do it for sure
   • Other: For my best friend Kulsoom (or Katz, as she calls herself).
5. The clouds are cryin'
   • Age: 14
   • Published: No
   • Progress: Completed
   • Speed: Medium
   • Chorus:
     The clouds are cryin'
     My heart out
     I don't even have the right
     To express my doubt
   • Other: Posted in the Review Room.
6. Do you think I'm crazy?
   • Age: 14
   • Published: No
   • Progress: Completed
   • Speed: Jumping speeds - Slow to Medium to Fast
   • Chorus:
     Do you think I'm crazy? *two beats*
     Do you think I've lost it? *two beats*
     Think again
     'Cause you are de-a-a-a-a-ad wrong!
   • Other: Posted in the Review Room.
7. Heartless (1) Slow version
   • Age: 15
   • Published: No
   • Progress: Completed
   • Speed: Slow
   • Chorus:
     Heartless, heartless
     Is what I call him
     Dying each never feeling a thing
     One day will come
     When it's too late
     His tears would fill up the dried Euphrates
   • Other: Posted in the Review Room.
8. Not yet deprived of hope
   • Age: 15
   • Published: No
   • Progress: Completed
   • Speed: Medium
   • Chorus:
     Because I'm
     Not yet deprived of hope
     Let my pain just elope
     I know I'm not turning to stone
     Not yet deprived of hope
   • Other: Posted in the Review Room.
9. Tell me why
   • Age: 15
   • Published: No
   • Progress: Completed
   • Speed: Fast (I'm so happy I've written a proper fast song!)
   • Chorus:
     Tell me why!
     My soul's going up the sky
     Tell me...tell me why!
     I just wanna cry n' cry
     Tell me why!
   • Other: Posted in the Review Room.
10. My life
    • Age: 15
    • Published: No
    • Progress: Completed
    • Speed: Medium
    • Chorus:
      Oh my *two beats*
      You're right *two beats*
      My life
    • Other: Posted in the Review Room.
11. Feeling my demise
    • Age: 15
    • Published: No
    • Progress: Completed
    • Speed: Fast
    • Chorus:
      Feeling my demise
      I feel so undone *choral tune commences and ends before next verse*
      Take my heart back
      But unlock this dungeon *choral tune commences*
    • Other: Posted in the Review Room. AND MY FAVORITE SONG EVER!!!
12. I ask you, O God
    • Age: 15
    • Published: No
    • Progress: Completed
    • Speed: Medium
    • Chorus:
      Rotten in my own self
      I ask you, O God
      Why is man so blind and deaf
      And why, am I not
    • Other: Posted in Review Room.
13. God has come home
    • Age: 15
    • Published: No
    • Progress: Completed
    • Speed: Medium
    • Chorus:
      Hugging my soul, once more
      I feel
      The truth bequeath hope
      Slaughtering my hate, once more
      I feel
      God has come home
    • Other: Posted in Review Room. And I really like it.
14. Ne ne Nai na
    • Age: 15
    • Published: No
    • Progress: Completed
    • Speed: Fast
    • Chorus:
      Ne ne ne ne Nai na...Na-i-na!
      Someday you will finally get it!
      Feelin' kickin' lickin'...round up!
      Don't feel like a misfit!
    • Other: Posted in Review Room.
15. Where am I
    • Age: 15
    • Published: No
    • Progress: Completed
    • Speed: Medium
    • Chorus:
      Where, am I?
      Where is your creamy smile?
      Where, is life?
      When you are no longer mine
    • Other: Posted in Review Room.
16. Flea to Adam
    • Age: 15
    • Published: No
    • Progress: Completed
    • Speed: Medium
    • Chorus:
      Give me some more, Adam!
      Give me some more pain!
      I want to see why you are literate
      And I am not
    • Other: Posted in Review Room.
17. Let the rebirth begin
    • Age: 15
    • Published: No
    • Progress: Completed
    • Speed: Slow
    • Chorus:
      Let my soul go home
      Let it face the cold
      Let the pain finally kill me
      Let the rebirth begin!
    • Other: Posted in Review Room.
18. Power of the green
    • Age: First draft at 13, but redid at 15.
    • Published: No
    • Progress: Completed
    • Speed: Slow
    • Chorus:
      You had the power of the green...
      You've had what it takes to be...
    • Other: none.
19. Desperate
    • Age: First draft at 13, redid at 15.
    • Published: No
    • Progress: Completed
    • Speed: Slow
    • Chorus:
      Everything I say
      Slipping off and away
      Tell you what, I'm desperate
      Because you've never said the words *humming*
    • Other: none.
20. Mad
    • Age: First draft at 13, redid at 15.
    • Published: No
    • Progress: Completed
    • Speed: Medium
    • Chorus:
      I'm going mad *short beat*
      And I don't want to stop *short beat*
      It's better than to be a normal girl *beat*
    • Other: none.
21. Alive
    • Age: 15
    • Published: No
    • Progress: Completed
    • Speed: Fast
    • Chorus:
      Alive
      I'm feeling so alive
      Erupting new youth
      Placating pain
      I'm becoming alive
      Alive
      Now accept my true vibe
    • Other: Posted in the Review Room.
22. Live forever
    • Age: 15
    • Published: No
    • Progress: Completed
    • Speed: Medium
    • Chorus:
      It isn't over
      Unless you've won
      It hasn't started
      Unless you've lost...
      Play this gamble
      Now or never
      Shut down your evil
      And live forever
    • Other: Posted in the Review Room. And I like it a lot.
23. He's there
    • Age: 15
    • Published: No
    • Progress: Completed
    • Speed: Slow
    • Chorus:
      He's there
      I know
      I can breathe, he's there
      He still loves me
      I know
      I can live, he's there
    • Other: Posted in the Review Room.
24. Want to be alive (First English song ever...)
    • Age: First draft at the age of 13, redid at 15
    • Published: No
    • Progress: Completed
    • Speed: Medium
    • Chorus:
      Want to be alive *beat*
      Want to live a life no fears...want to...rejuvenate
      Oh yeah ahaan...
    • Other: none.
25. Grab the moment
    • Age: 15
    • Published: No
    • Progress: Completed
    • Speed: Slow
    • Chorus:
      You never know
      The light
      Until it’s gone
      When the seconds, glide
      And grow into hours
    • Other: none.
26. Embrace the truth
    • Age: 15
    • Published: No
    • Progress: Completed
    • Speed: Medium
    • Chorus:
      Voices have no ambi-ance
      When in hearts is si-e-lence
      Breathing cannot con-tinue
      When in souls is vio-e-lence
      *choral tune starts*
    • Other: Posted in the Review Room.
27. Fight Back
    • Age: 15
    • Published: No
    • Progress: Completed
    • Speed: Medium
    • Chorus:
      Do you think I've lost? *two beats*
      Everything and everyone
      Well yeah
      That ain't meanin' you have won
      Hell yeah
      We're jus' startin' to have some fun
    • Other: Posted in the Review Room.
28. Motto of a Patriot
    • Age: 15
    • Published: No
    • Progress: Completed
    • Speed: Slow
    • Chorus:
      Let us burn as we try
      But don’t let this passion die
      Hummari jaan chali jayay
      Magar yay aag na jayay
      (Let our life go
      But don’t let this fire go out)
    • Other: Posted in the Review Room.
29. Internal Rebirth
    • Age: 15
    • Published: No
    • Progress: Completed
    • Speed: Medium
    • Chorus:
      (I wouldn't call it a chorus, despite it's repetition, because it doesn't convey the message, but here it is):
      Better than breathing
      If I must receive your hate
      Better than living
      If I must live a Muslim's fate
    • Other: Posted in my blog in this section.

To start off, I'm not against early marriage. It's a convenient way to keep oneself fulfilled and continue their life too. But here, in the modern world; early marriages can be tricky.

I would first clarify that early marriages aren't necessarily torture or barbaric, they're better than date rapes and having 8 sexual partners before marriage, IMO. Also, by early marriages I mean not forcible marriages. I'm a girl, and have deeply looked into feminism (I warn you, I am not the modern day feminist. I am a neutral person; both men and women have rights, not just women or men.) I mean marriages with the full consent of the girl, given freedom to study and do a modest job if she likes. I'm not sure about everyone, but I read that women marry on average at the age of 25-26 in USA. And in Sweden, the age is around 30 for females. In Pakistan, the marriage is 17 (surprised much?), which is alright since girls round here are pretty useless anyway. However, the marriage age is rising with the trend of feminism sprawling over the nation, which is alright as long as a girl marrying young isn't harassed and teased. Who could be, quite possibly, me.

Yeah me. Nothing to laugh about. I mean, this is freaky. I am too immature. And marriage? For a yet-to-be-16 girl? Heh. Heh. Heh. I'm flattered.

Like I said, I have nothing against marrying young or old; it's a matter of finding Mr. Right. However, I have many things against the social norms and values which have nothing to do with religion, yet they are imposed on the women by women. (That's the wackiest thing yet. Women eat women. Wack. Wack.) And one of them is the brainwashing they do. Apparently, a girl's reason to live is to get married. Which is so totally absurd. And after marriage, to have kids. No, not kids, have 'sons'. And after that, to do a repeat telecast of these commands on the generations to come.

Religiously, it is not true. It is proved through two very eminent women in the history of Islam. Hazrat Khadija (R.A.), the Prophet's (P.B.U.H.) first wife, was widowed twice, and she lived a rather unmarried life for most of her life. At the age of forty, she finally met her ultimate marriage. If marriage was everything, she should've committed suicide. Even so, the Prophet's (P.B.U.H.) wife Hazrat Ayesha (R.A.) [because of whom, people have this concept that the Apostle, God Forbid, was paedophilic. I'll clarify this stupid accusation some other time] was widowed at the age of 25 (not sure, but something like that). She lived for another 48 years, unmarried. If marriage were the purpose of her life, she should've committed suicide. In fact, the other wives of the Prophet (P.B.U.H.) remained unmarried for the rest of their life. [I'll explain why he married so many times some other time too] Point to be noted, she was a scholar just like other wives of the Prophet (P.B.U.H.), not only in Islam but also other subjects like medicine, Arab history, etc. About her knowledge, it is said that it outnumbered the knowledge of all the wives of the Prophet (P.B.U.H) and all of his companions, except few. About Hazrat Khadija (R.A.), the prophet said:
"The best women in this world are Hazrat Mary (Yes, Mary, mother of Jesus) and Hazrat Khadija."
Also, the women used to work. Hazrat Khadija (R.A.) was a merchant, Hazrat Zainab (R.A.) (another wife) used to work with leather while other women used to make cosmetics and sell them. Islam doesn't forbid anything like that. But, the Pakistani society does. How stupid.

And now, my dearest mother is dying to get me married after my GCSE examinations. Though I'm not really planning a very intensive career which would be blocked, I know that if something like that happens I would become like everyone other Pakistani women: useless. You see, once women marry and have sons, we are wastage. Which is so totally not what I want! I want to marry when my education is complete, my brain is ready for a practical life and my childishness, if not gone, is suppressible. Because if I marry now, I will not be able to do either of these, thanks to the society. The most my mother can do is search and look for a guy, but I am not marrying him.

Despite my arrogant self, there is every chance that my mom would force me. Eek! I better immigrate to some other country, quick. Before they ban Muslims officially. That way, I can live in peace and work for my country's wellbeing in a safer environment, instead in a bombing playground. Till then, take care!

LEGEND
(P.B.U.H) = peace be upon him
(R.A.) = Razit'Allah A'nhu, Arabic for 'May Allah be pleased with them'
Hazrat = like saying 'sir' or 'madam'; a title which offers respect.

There have been two bombings (in the sense of the word, perhaps more) in my hometown, or my perfect city Lahore, which is seemingly now a court for the catch-the-bomb game of stupid politicians.

One bombing took place in the house of a lawyer, not sure of his name, while another bombing took place in FIA (Federal Investigation Agency) building, in which around 50-60% of the employees had arrived, at least 500 people in the workforce. People from the nearby buildings and from those inside who survived, claim there were two bombs, not one.

This caused our house to tremble, and it seemed as if a car had hit our gate. I woke up to the noise - Allah, save us! It is terrifying to think of it. The lawyer's house wasn't too far from our own, well it was far but our house was in the same line as his. And did it scare us! The car which contained the bomb (in case of FIA) started to leak out their CNG and this increases chances of fire. Our house smells too!

There seems to be several fatalities, but the reporters claim only a few. What will become of mankind? Instead of standing at the accident site, making bucks for a stupid news channel and panicking everyone, those healthy and strong men should help the already scarce rescue team to save the people. Is money the only reason people live? How inhuman we have become. I'm just grateful that I didn't go to school. Could have been be in those 2 children's dead bodies.

I also hope nothing happened to my best friend, Mavra. She's a very sweet girl, but her father's in the Intelligence. Any chances of her getting intertwined are few, but one can never be too sure.

O Lord, help us. (Amen)

I just got done with my Marchies. Oh,that's not a word, I know. But it's a word now.

This year's theme - innovation, rehabilitation and optimism. And definitely opting to somehow, get my parents to let me study abroad. Which reminds me - any American folk kind enough to tell me what would they do if a girl dressed in a black hijab comes by, in University? I want to take precautions.

As far as my assessments are concerned, they went really nice. First was Islamic studies and English, and despite the fact that I had skipped a whole topic in Islamic studies, and in English I was too dull to even think, they went well. The next exam, Mathematics, was also good. Physics proved to be an easy one for everyone (rhymes!). Chemistry was also easy, provided I had studied and paid attention to the basics. . Then there was Biology. Again - I hadn't studied much, and skipped a whole topic. But the exam was great. Today's exams, Pakistan studies (i.e. History and geography of Pakistan), and Urdu, were also good. AGAIN, I didn't study a thing, I prepared for Geography in the morning (I woke up at 6 and studied for only an hour). I read History in registration time (10 minutes...?) and just listened to my friend for Urdu. On the weekend, I was writing 3 short stories, 4 songs and just wasting my time. Oh, I also visited my maternal uncle (in Urdu, he'd be called 'mamoo') since it was his 25th anniversary. Did I miss anything? Oh, I did. I slept for a long while this weekend.

I also learnt from my friend that she thinks I'm intelligent. God, she needs to check with a psychiatrist. Oh and she thinks I'm a Grim Reaper. What's that??? I know he's a guy with a freaky weapon in his hands, but what else...need to google this.

Ah. I'm so happy. Thank God, oh thanks Allah. For just knick knacks, do you know that Allah is Arabic for God, and not something weird? We just call Him particularly Allah because the meaning of Allah is more of 'the absolute God', and it cannot be manipulated (e.g. goddess). And, do you know that the universal Muslim greeting (Aslaam-u-a'laikum) means 'Peace be on you'? And Islam comes from the root word 'Salm' which means 'peace', and also 'Silm' which means, in religious terminology 'submitting one's will to Allah'? Bah, just informing.

So, Aslam-u-alaikum everyone!