This won't take long.... lie. Anyway, in my ever frustrating quest to find a female worth talking to, I have hit another road block: my best friend. See, I've had this best friend for a while. A long while. And she's awesome, don't get me wrong. But she's stubborn. I started getting really close to her, and naturally (be it because of, I don't know...my penis) wanted to do some not so Moses'-law-abiding things in and around her orifices. She was actually fine with that. However, when I wanted to go further still, she said no. What I mean by further is a more stable, long term relationship. Her reasoning? She didn't want us dating to come between our friendship. What the hell? Ah well, better luck next time, right? Wrong. I asked her out again one night, and some circumstances made it impossible for her to answer (for the love of God don't ask), so she had to go. I give her some space, because she had gone through something mourning-worthy, if that made sense. And a few days later we talk again. She's really nervous and kind of distracted, so I'm just like 'What? What's going on?' No reply, just the standard 'Nothing, just tired.' So I go about my business. Until I see her and her new boyfriend... Oh my God, I have never been so pissed in my life. But that's what the deal is, huh? You think you find something great and then you realize that that person is made of the same thing everyone else is: the ability to hurt you. I don't know. It may seem like I'm ragging on females a little bit here, but why in the mess can't you guys be honest? Seriously, I have never not been honest in a relationship, and I've never been in a relationship with someone who's returned the favor. It's so frustrating.... Advice?
...and I'm beginning to think that it's unhealthy for me to continue doing this. When I get home today I think I'll take about nine or ten Nyquils and pass out. Hope I don't wet myself...
...and it ain't no fun. Being 17 (at least for another four months) is a major disadvantage, but now I have to contend with sexism? I applied at this day care place, right? Go in there, ask for an app (after asking if they're hiring) and the lady's all like: "Oh, um...We don't really hire...men." Yeah. I kid you not. I have almost a year's experience working at another daycare-like place, but no, they just pass up on next to free help for the simple fact that I have testicles? Okay... Whatever man. But it's not all frowns, I got a couple interviews (one that canceled, the other is later in the week) and a possible straight hire from Pac-Sun of all places. =D So I guess all is well.
...A PAIN IN THE ASS Just thought I'd throw it out there. Really, it was a pain in the mouth, but ass and mouth are usually so close that it doesn't matter. I haven't been on the boards in forever, and I apologize. I got in a little trouble for nearly providing salvia to a minor, so that accounts for most of my absence. I'm talking to this new chick. For those of you keeping up with my blogs you'd know I had trouble with a different one a while ago. That's over, we're friends again, all is well. Anyway, this new chick is a lot more contagiously awesome than Abi was, and she enjoys many of the same things I do, like making fun of handicapped kids and whatnot. (Psst, that was a joke). Seriously, we moved pretty fast. See, she moved here from Dallas in the last four weeks of last school year and she had no friends. Well, now she got in with this bad crowd and, being the nice guy that I am, I informed her of this, and she was grateful. We started calling each other a little more and hanging out, the whole awkward "friends before you date thing" that most people call 'talking'. While doing so she goes over her exs and I go over mine, just as a failsafe I guess to ensure there won't be any embarrasing/confusing moments later in our relationship. All things checked out (aside from the fact that she almost became best friends with an ex-girlfriend of mine who just so happens to think I'm an asshole), and we're moving along quite nicely. Physically there's been nothing but tummy-touching hugs (you know, the kind you won't give to anyone but those significant others...even your mommy), but we're getting there. Anyway, that's what's up guys. Sorry to keep myself away from y'all. God bless.
...I get IP banned. I don't know what it was about, but I got on today and it said an admin IP banned me. Later the ban was lifted, but I was still quite curious as to what happened. I thought that maybe someone got all offendicated over something I said in the theology thread, but then I realized that no one would care about what some young whipper snapper had to say anyway, let alone take offense to it. Regardless, today I found out this chick I was talking to started dating one of her exes again...big deal, right? Well here's the story: We were talking for quite some time, and the only place we really see each other is at church. I mean, yeah, we can both drive, but we're both really busy. So anyway, one day she makes the offhand remark that she doesn't want me to ask her out at church. I take this in, thinking to be the clever creative person and, you know, listen to what she said and not ask her out at church. I finally get to the point where I'm willing to dive in, you know, to make that big commitment (and I have really bad trust issues, so this is hard for me). I call her to see if she's home, no answer. I stop by anyway, no one home. So I get a little worried cuz she won't return my calls and I haven't seen her at church. Well, yesterday a guy tried to add me on myspace...and I was kind of curious as to why he would have a picture of him kissing this girl I've been talking to as his default. Turns out she started dating this guy because she thought I was ignoring her. Her justification: she gave me plenty of opportunities to ask her out and I never took them. My question: when? Her response: "Why do you think I went to church all those Wednesdays when we were talking?" -.- WHAT THE HELL?!?!?! She told me that this guy (apparently one of her many ex-boyfriends) just started texting her. He asked her out and now they're dating. And now I'm pissed. I brought it to her attention that it was her dumb ass that told me not to ask her out at church. I also talked to her about going over to her house. She's being a total dykeasaurus rex about it too, laying blame and stuff. It doesn't really seem like my fault, but nothing really does from my perspective. Was I in the wrong guys? Help me better understand this situation.
...I feel like I could actually make it on these boards. Where on other forums there are usually a hand full of total asses, here there is a definite lack of them. They were like locusts, and now the fields are clear. Imagery enough for you? But I enjoy my time here, and that's the key to the success of any forum; ensure that your members enjoy their time here, and all will be well. Yesterday I saw a kid post a departure thread about how he doesn't feel he should have to submit two critique posts before being allowed to post his material. I bet that's pretty common around here, no? It really bothered me how someone wouldn't even try to critique someone's stuff. But then again, there are people on this earth who follow the ideas of the Church of Euthanasia, so I guess anything is possible, hmm? Again, thanks for the read, and I hope you have a great night. God bless.
...I don't think I'll be getting any sleep tonight/today. Tomorrow I'll go to the lake, then go watch Kemistery practice before getting home and pretending to sleep again. Though I wonder sometimes why God would create sleep, I sometimes find myself wondering even more why he created people. If all we do is make trouble for him, why bother? Eh, but who needs sleep? I've been up for almost 53 hours, and I'll likely only get a couple tomorrow. I could be spending this time writing, but I don't have anything to write about. I could be reading my Bible, but I'd rather complain about nothing. So I think I'll just read some Hawthorne before laying down and attempting sleep. Good ol' Nate keepin' me company before I hit the hay. And for anyone crazy enough to read this, I'm sorry I wasted your time. Maybe next time you'll learn that my blogs amount to little more than my random ranting.