One thing that writing has helped me to realize is how narrow my point of view truly is and how little I actually understand the people around me. It may be easy to learn just enough about a person to befriend him or her, but to understand a person well enough to be sure of their exact response is truly difficult.
As I work on my high fantasy romance novella and come to an important scene between the two main characters, I find myself struggling to find the exact words to use in each of the characters' response. If one thinks of their character as an actual person, relatable in the real world, then it becomes painfully obvious that no matter how "natural" the writer tries to make his or her character's personalities, much of it will always be forced onto the character based on the writer's own experience and point of views.
How many people can honestly say that they have actually experienced everything that their characters have gone through? Have you ever fought a dragon with a sword and shield? Lost your entire family to war? Betrayed by your countrymen? Rode a horse into battle? You can try to imagine yourself in the shoes of your character and decide what they would do given the traits that you have created for them, but the experience would still be your own. People are not like computer programs that can only operate within set parameters given by their programmer.
That being said (before I start droning on), dialogue is one of the things that I always struggle with the most because I can never be sure if the response that I write would be the best response that my characters would say if they were an actual person who have had their own life to experience. I may have a slightly better understanding of my characters than other people because I am their creator, but to understand them as individuals separate from myself is beyond me at this point.
When one truly understands another, one cannot help but love that person because there is no longer any conflict, much like how there is wind only because there is a difference in the temperatures. Do you love everyone without any bias what-so-ever like you would a romantic partner, best friend, or family? I feel that this is no different from understanding one's characters, but I also feel that most people only love their characters because it is their own creations.
Eh well, maybe I am just over thinking these things. I can definitely say that writing a story with romance as the dominant genre is something that I will not do again for a long, long time. Them feelings. You can understand it on some levels, but it is no easy task to simply take on someone else's feelings and circumstances without personal influences. I am going to call out anyone that say they can.
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