The Procrastibot

As it's gears whirred and ticked, it's heavy arms lifted up from the keyboard and dropped with a gentle thud onto it's metallic base below. It looked up from the screen and starred around the half empty coffee shop it found itself in.

It's preposterous, eyes. Why did I have them make it with eyes, it's a robot it knows what it types already.

Wait what? Coffee! I thought it was a robot... mumble mumble... how did it get it's hands on my coffee. I already plugged it into the socket what more does it want!

"Well if I am a robot, then I'm a pretty useless one! You're all so scared of artificial intelligence but I'm not that terrifying am I?"

I rolled my eyes and looked away from the photographs of Italy, and much like their sepia tone I sighed my proverbial mechanical lungs. I longed to escape, like most people do, but I also find myself complacently loving the comfort my self imposed cage gives me.

"You are artificial yes" I cocked my head, "but no-" I grinned, with more enthusiasm than I felt "No you're not intelligent at all"

The bot's head drooped for a second, then looked back up- "That sounds like something from BlackAdder!- Get with the times Del it's all about netflix! This only shows your lack of a social life! Come up with something original and I'll get back to work"

"Ah Procrastibot, if I could do that, I'd be able to afford a better, perhaps even marginally terrifying version of you..."

"Or friends" it chimed in.

"You don't buy those Bot" I said, looking to the distance as I tried to disguise my discomfort.

The bot looked forward, straight on and with his voice slightly rising said

"You bought me"