That all makes sense, thanks. Oddly enough, I've already written a scene where the lesbian acts a bit overly protective when two men stop to talk to them. So yeh, I guess I just write from the perspective of what makes sense.
Don't you just love it when a scene you've already written turns out to have accidentally made even more sense than you'd initially thought it did
This is an interesting point -- that is @KaTrian 's point. It did make me think of something though. In another thread, where we were discussing microaggressions, I happened to see on a microaggressions page that bisexuals didn't like the comment that their partners should be more worried that they'd cheat, because they're wishy-washy or could go to a man or a woman/have essentially twice the choice of straight or gay people. So, while it makes some logical sense to me that maybe that could be a concern, I'm not bisexual. So I don't know whether this characterization here would be offensive to bisexuals? Maybe someone who is bisexual could weigh in, because I honestly don't know. (And of course, the lesbian could be overly protective in general -- when men or women talk to them, so it doesn't necessarily have to be because of the bisexual element.) Just wanted to throw it out there as something to be aware of. (If it's appropriate and makes sense, maybe this could even be addressed directly by your bisexual character -- being insulted by the implication she's not able to love a single person and commit, just because there's a larger pool of people, and the other character having to explain or maybe feel contrite?)
@chicagoliz 1) I'm exactly the opposite of bisexual, so statistically I'd probably in an even worse position to make guesses than you are, however I would think that 2) Even if your partner were either homosexual or heterosexual, s/he is still going to encounter his/her preferred gender several times a day for every day of his/her life. If a bisexual can't be trusted not to cheat, simply by the virtue of "being surrounded" by temptation, then a heterosexual can't be trusted either. If a heterosexual is to be considered trustworthy until proven otherwise, then a bisexual should be too. 3) That's probably the best way to handle this. A monosexual character can certainly think that a bisexual is "more likely" to cheat than she is, but if she gets called out on this by the people around her, then the narrative shows that she's being unreasonable, and it becomes a character flaw, not a story flaw.
I think you are exactly right,@Simpson17866. I wanted to convey that, but I think you did a more thorough job.
I started off writing a short story, wanting to keep it to a max 10k word length. But as ideas bloom and characters develop, I don't know if this is possible anymore. I only chose this for myself, what I consider a very awkward theme and topic, to get some practice writing romance and relationship dynamics. What I am finding out is it's a very enjoyable project.
That's called bipohobia and it's a massive problem in the lgbt community. Many people see it as a phase or as something that 100% gay people call themselves as they come to terms with being who they are. In some cases this is true (and may be part of what dragged the term through the mud in the first place) and if the lesbian character is insecure or can't wrap her head around finding both men and women attractive it's a point of view they'll likely have. There are even some lesbians that are outright disgusted to find out that their partner has been with a man before. It's not pretty, but you get pricks in every community.
I know quite a bit of good points have already been made, but I thought I would try to throw my two cents in. I was in a similar situation (though I knew the character was gay from the beginning) and I think its important to be empathetic and do a bit of research. At the same time your writing a for a bi character so don't get hung up on stereotypes and sexuality if that isn't the focus of your story. I would just try to write in from a "human" stand point rather than gay, bi, or straight. On the other hand if there is a trait that you think goes with the character do it. I would rather have a character that adheres to a few stereotypes than one that is watered down. Just from reading materials from different communities and talking to people with various sexual orientations its more or less the same as far as the basics of romance and insecurities, so just do what you think is right.
I like this quite a lot. Sure, there are cultural differences to being queer - the community is different, sure, and there's a sense of unified history against all the shit that's happened and is still happening - but in a lot of ways, it's not all that different. I'm even more glad that the OP realized they didn't know this particular bit of knowledge and asked; sounds obvious, I know, to ask about stuff you don't know, but you'd be surprised. For me, as a bisexual woman, I would absolutely hold hands with someone if I was upset - although that question isn't so much centered around sexuality as it is around comfort levels and in what ways your characters require comfort. Also, please, for the love of god, don't get into biphobic bullshit. Bisexuals are not "more likely to cheat," there's no risk of it being a phase, it's not like we can't make up our minds, and if it's at all "stressful" to date a bisexual person, it's probably because of people's misconceptions towards bisexuality and refusing to ask or talk about it with their partner(s) and not the fault of the actual bi person themselves, who is probably sick of hearing this shit. I know I am. If you're writing this into the story as a perspective of a character, it's important to have your narrative show that this is a ridiculous premise. Lord knows there's enough stories that actually try to back this shit up, and that's damaging.
@Fitzroy Zeph Your character is an individual, not a collection of probabilities relating to how a lesbian woman might or might not be likely to dress. I think that's the way to approach it - you establish her as a person, having the character traits you want her to have as a person, and you write her that way. I know a number of lesbians (my good friend and my children's mother is a lesbian), and there is no way to assign universal traits even to the ones I know personally, much less to the population as a whole. No one ever suspects my friend is a lesbian, there are others who are assumed to be pretty quickly (and there are straight women who are wrongly assumed to be). Just write her as a person. The commonalities between individuals vastly outweigh the differences, and the specific traits of the individual are certainly more important than a statistical likelihood of characteristics based on sexual orientation. To the extent the lesbian aspect impacts the story (such as when you are writing about romantic involvements, or maybe activism, or other such subjects), then I think you focus on them as story elements. But you shouldn't let them dictate characterization.
Thanks everyone, you actually made this a lot easier for me. I am going to put myself into each of their heads and write from what I know about people and how they act under certain circumstances. There is only implied sex, so I don't have to go there. Phew. The story is about missed opportunities and choices, something everyone has to wrangle with.
Don't think of them as "lesbian characters". Just think of them as "characters who happen to be in love with each other". Describe them as you would describe any straight character: how you see them. I don't walk or talk a certain way just because I prefer guys, and neither do most other gay people. On the other hand, if one of them is more stereotypical, that can be okay too. Some people really do fit the stereotypes, and if your character happens to be one of them, there's nothing wrong with that. Just don't make their orientation define them; that's only one part of a person. Make sure there's more to both characters than just being lesbians.
