The Not Happy Thread

Why wouldn't you?!

 

Sorry I'm a bit out of sorts my doctor changed my medication AGAIN...took me off Olanzapine and put me on Abilify. I think I've turned into his lab rat.

 

My reaction to abilify was to vomit for two days. I think it's probably the second worst I have ever felt about anything.

But beyond that, abilify is a very low functioning, low intensity anti-psychotic. I'd want to be careful that the dose at which it is effective isn't so high it starts giving you serious problems.

Edited to add: this thing on CNN about the studies on abilify
http://www.cnn.com/2011/HEALTH/05/03/abilify.use.questions/

 

I don't know why my doctor changed me, I was only on the Olanzapine for two months. It would be nice if it wasn't so hard to find good doctors. I'm pretty much stuck with what I can get.

 

I just went to an awards night for a local short story contest. I was pretty happy with my piece and got good feedback from teachers, friends and family. I ended up not even getting into the shortlist and the winner has won the contest for the last two years :/
I think I might submit it to another contest but outside of my city, see what happens.

 

How does it work in the States? Do you have to find your own pdoc, or is one assigned to you? I had to get a referral from my G.P. and a consultant was allotted to me. I've been really lucky as he and I get on well and he's even phoned me periodically to make sure I'm tolerating my new meds well enough. None of those I've been to before would have given me a second thought much less follow through, so I'm really pleased this time around. Getting someone who actually listens has made all the difference.

 

Here we just have to find our own doctors, unfortunately in the area I live there is a shortage of pdocs and the one I have now a visit is like going through a drive thru. You are in and out in about 10 minutes.

 

I felt the same about my last pdoc. Half the time it felt like he was just pushing paperwork rather than actually listening to me about the growing list of side-effects I was experiencing. It's no wonder I was off meds for nearly ten years; they felt as if they were doing me more harm than good, and he didn't have my back. Not only that, he was the spittin' image of Jerry Springer. Any appointment I did manage to get made me feel as if I was hanging my dirty linen in public.

 

I didn't buy the most expensive gift for a family member. Younger sibling has to side-eye me about it. She makes more than me, lives in a friend's house for really cheap rent, and travels a lot and is always conveniently unavailable when I bring said family member to the doctor. I've stopped engaging with her but she continues to be abrasive.

 

As well as submitting three bids today, I have to write another two (18 pages and two pages) and get them ready for submission on Monday.

If you see me posting on the forum before the evening, I'm procrastinating and feeling sorry for myself rather than getting the hell on with it.

 

Just had to go to Walmart at 2:00 am to purchase my severely constipated 7-year-old a suppository, which was then administered.

I win the Not Happy Thread this night.

 

You do.

 

I'm not very happy with my riding teacher. She's constantly instructing or complimenting others, and if she happens to talk to me, it's either in the form of a snide remark ("Kat's horse doesn't seem to get it" -- everyone knows it's not the horse's fault, it's the rider 99,9 % of the time, so this is her way to say I'm doing something wrong), a complaint ("watch where you're riding" when it's actually someone else cutting in my way upon her instruction), or if by God she actually says clearly what I should fix, after I've tried to follow her instruction, she doesn't give me feedback on whether or not what I've changed is actually a change for the better or if I'm still doing it wrong. On one class, she was calling another rider by my name and telling her to fix this and that about her riding. When she realized her mistake, she said "Sorry, Kat, I mixed you guys up. But you were probably making the same mistakes anyway." Okay, it's possible I was, although they weren't my "signature" mistakes, but that too is pretty snide.

To be honest, I don't even mind snidery so much, whatever, but the fact that she's not teaching annoys me as it leaves me in the dark about the things I should do to improve. At my level, it's the little things that make it or break it, but I need someone more knowledgeable than me to help me spot those mistakes. She is able to do this with others, after all. She isn't snide with them either, so what is it about me that prompts that kind of behavior?! Makes me wonder if I'm really a huge fuck-up who has no business on the saddle. On the other hand, I'm extra-motivated to ace my classes. Maybe it's some weird psychology trick. She's got me pegged and thinks that's how I should be motivated -- and it sorta kinda works.

 

I ain't got no time fo dat. I'd be all up in her grill gettin' the low down on her problem and sorting it or going elsewhere.

 

Me too. No way I'd be handing over money to someone like that, even if I thought it was getting results. Kick her to the kerb, Kat!

 

@KaTrian There was always one at every manege I've ever been to. Ordinarily, I'd say, "Ignore her," but if you feel you are losing out, it might be an idea to pull her to the side and address it, especially if it's not a one time thing. Disparaging remarks are unprofessional. You aren't paying her to insult you.

 

I used to pay a chick to insult me and step on my stones...

 

I used to have a trainer who almost never complimented me to my face. I could win in a practice session and go home feeling like I somehow lost. Other trainees received compliments for doing things I did all the time. I've since moved, and we are still friends and I think he is a great trainer. The truth is he complimented me behind my back all the time. Criticism and sparse praise work to motivate some people. Others thrive better with gentler criticism.

You need to ask yourself whether you are improving and if you think the instructors cares. Right now you have three complaints. I think the lack of praise may be on purpose in order to motivate you. The harsh criticism may actually be good, if it is allowing you to correct your own mistakes. You are in essence always being pushed further without even realizing it. The only thing that sounds uneccessary to me are the snide remarks. Unless this is competitive horse back riding?

 

A mostly false and highly exaggerated rumor about me which lost me lots of friends and tarnished my reputation years ago where I live has spread into the mind of someone who is moving into our house in a week. Lost sleep, cried a bunch, have had to maximize my self care -- barely made it to work today. Then a friend was having a breakdown and needed support. Oddly, offering support always makes me feel better (good person, sane, helpful, useful, caring). But my stress level is still quite high, and I am feeling on edge, depressive, even higher anxiety than I already was from other life circumstances. I wish the people who think I'm some kind of demon understood that I am entering the mental health field in order to prevent people from doing terrible things to themselves and others. Sometimes I guess it's just easier to simplify people as black and white cartoon characters rather than complex creatures with complex motivations, personal histories and developmental processes. Deep breath in, hold it, out slow. Again. And again.

 

Moving into your house? Perhaps that will be an opportunity to set the record straight?

 

Today I was a little depressed. I usually don't use any med
but I have some special prayer instead. I read a few of the prayers in that bad condition and I observed a miracle again!
The merciful God removed all my sadness and anxiety and now I am more relaxed . It is an amazing thing! The prayer did the same that a strong sedative like Morphine does! But better than such material things. I basically avoid using medicines even an ordinary pill! Also I go to doctor very seldom, e.g. it is about one year that I have not gone to doctor!
I mostly read the prayers and request God to keep me out
of every sickness and difficulty and he have saved me frequently because of his unimaginable mercy!

Apart from this personal issue, today, I saw the picture of a Syrian little boy in the shore of Turkish beaches that had been drowned in the sea. He was along with his parents that were migrating to European countries like England and Germany due to the danger of War Zone in Syria (This picture was very pathetic). Thousands of this people migrated from Syria to Europe because desperation in that difficulty and sadly some of them have lost their soul in this way.
unfortunately, the numbers of this innocent migrants dead because of suffocation in the narrow space of hidden storage of the ships or tracks, and some were drowned in the seas.

The other unpleasant thing is that, the European governments and in charges have hold that wretched people beyond their boundaries or in the camps without enough facilities and equipment in a critical condition and don't allow them to arrive a better place, while a lot of them are women and children.
Today I read in the news that some European responsible among Cameron, the prime minister of England had an agreement to house those emigrant people and divide them between European lands.
Humanity is not relative to any religion, although the divinely religions order people to observe humanity and help other fellowmen.

I see in the news, some of people of these countries try to show mercy to this people and consider them like themselves, while a little group of them are uneasy and are unsatisfied to aid this distress people. However, they were not a poor people or needful for food or money, but they migrated to Europe temporary, because of a critical condition of the war zone.
So our humanity order us to be merciful to this people and help them.

When I saw this pictures broke my heart and flowed tear from my eyes.

Spoiler: Moderated Added

 

Mans, if I may speak without offending you, how many refugees is Iran taking in?

 

@Mans - ****...just....just ****...

I've no ****ing words for this. No ****ing words at all. So tragic what's going on.

No words at all.

 

In future, out of respect for the fact that such images are not intuitively anticipated in a forum such as ours, make use of spoiler tags.

 

Does anyone else think that this Kim Davies person looks and acts like the overly religious nut that eventually gets killed in a Stephen King book/movie?