That Moment...

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by Lewdog, Jul 8, 2014.

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  1. Iain Sparrow

    Iain Sparrow Banned Contributor

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    But when you were a teenager... where did you have sex?!
    It must be a cultural thing here in America, most of my first sexual encounters were in the back of van or the back seat of my car. I had a learners permit at 15, and license at 16. I lost my virginity on a water bed in the back of a Dodge Van with shag carpet. It's very romantic I know, imagine that action under the glow of a blacklight and velvet posters of pirate galleons and dragons. Oh to be young again!
     
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  2. Iain Aschendale

    Iain Aschendale Lying, dog-faced pony Marine Supporter Contributor

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    Black light, carpet, shaggin' wagon. Oh my.
     
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  3. Iain Sparrow

    Iain Sparrow Banned Contributor

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    ... and looking back at it now, it all seems like a dream. The years slowly tear your heart out.
     
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  4. Iain Aschendale

    Iain Aschendale Lying, dog-faced pony Marine Supporter Contributor

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    I'm just wondering if your teenage self understood why that carpet looked like a day-glo Jackson Pollock...
     
  5. KaTrian

    KaTrian A foolish little beast. Contributor

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    In the comfort of our homes...?

    Over here, if you're doing it in a car at 15, chances are you're fucking an 18-year-old (or older, because you can't get a license earlier than that)--which is illegal since the age of consent is 16--so there are a few reasons why backseat-boinking isn't a thing. :p
     
  6. Wreybies

    Wreybies Thrice Retired Supporter Contributor

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    TMW a giant mosquito flies by you (no, you don't manage to squash it) and you start examining yourself for signs of violation. :/
     
  7. Link the Writer

    Link the Writer Flipping Out For A Good Story. Contributor

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    TMW you have an image of someone holding up a Ken barbie doll to @Wreybies and asking, "Where did the bad mosquito touch you"? :p
     
  8. big soft moose

    big soft moose An Admoostrator Admin Staff Supporter Contributor Community Volunteer

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    In the park (up against a tree for extra eeewww) , at the beach, at her house while her parents were at work, on a sofa in the college rec room, against a wall out the back of 'gossips' night club (there was a meat market if ever there was one), in the disabled toilet of gossips night club (ditto), in travel lodges and such (the no tell motel), anywhere else that seemed vaguely convenient ... and that's not the exhaustive list.

    Shagging in cars never held that much appeal to me, as i'm 6ft 4 so it was distinctly cramped unless we left the back door open which is both cold and increases the likelihood of discovery
     
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  9. PenelopeWillow

    PenelopeWillow Member

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    I had my first apartment at 17 so I just did it there!
     
  10. Mumble Bee

    Mumble Bee Keep writing. Contributor

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    What? Oh. yeah... I totally had like, tons of sex as a teenager.
    You measure sex by the ton, right?
     
  11. Albeit

    Albeit Active Member

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    Yes they do, and frankly it sucks.

    That is why I continue to write significant events down. That way you may get a chance to outplay the memory thief (time) occasionally. I am not kidding myself, the bastard will win, but you know what, I can still hear Christine D. I can still hear her sighs telling me that it was time to take care of her, stop being a nerd and put the pen down about 40 years ago in St.Jean on the Richelieu river. Especially when I reread what I wrote back then, her wanton sighs become clear once again.

    But ah yes, That Moment above is just a thread post now. Love it.
     
    Last edited: Jan 20, 2017
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  12. Iain Sparrow

    Iain Sparrow Banned Contributor

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    When I was 17 I was perpetually broke and in trouble. But thinking on it now, I was carefree and careless, the world was my apartment!:)
     
  13. Iain Sparrow

    Iain Sparrow Banned Contributor

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    I'm not very nostalgic. Oh there are times I look back over my shoulder, but not for too long.
     
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  14. KaTrian

    KaTrian A foolish little beast. Contributor

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    By the fuckton, I believe.
     
  15. big soft moose

    big soft moose An Admoostrator Admin Staff Supporter Contributor Community Volunteer

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    a freind of mine once worked out the total distance travelled by the average member during average intercourse - there after our group of freinds used to measure our conquests in 'penis miles' - hey don't judge, we were very young
     
    Last edited: Jan 20, 2017
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  16. Albeit

    Albeit Active Member

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    Not big on nostalgia either. It often just amounts to a form of regret in most cases. And God knows that nostalgia sells in these times of want and woe.

    I guess that living and jotting down significant life events is to be seen as a way to build a pension fund of memories in case I live to be too old to do anything significant worth remembering.

    Hell, I am not sure that makes any sense either.

    Carry on. What the frag else is one to do?
     
  17. big soft moose

    big soft moose An Admoostrator Admin Staff Supporter Contributor Community Volunteer

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    That moment when sorting through a box of 25 year old paperwork you find the original calculation to which this refers (written bizarley on the back of a law course reading list - bizarre because none of us were reading law) which i reproduce for you here (yes, we were very young, yes, Farley the author of this 'research' was studying engineering, and no, knowing this calculation didn't help us get laid more)

    "the average cock is 6" (or 15cm) in length erect (No I don't know how he determined this) but after initial insertion its only withdrawn by about four inches (10cm) so the average throw per thrust is 20cm

    Therefore if we reckon that the average sexual encounter lasts about 30 minutes (
    youthful optimism at its best), and each throw takes 2 seconds to complete then we are looking at 30 throws per minute, or 900 throws per encounter... so 900 x20cm = 18000cm or 180m per shag

    ergo one penis mile would comprise 8.8 (call it 9) shags
    "

    Yes I am embarrassed (25 years later) to report that each of the four of us in that group kept a record of our penis miles for the rest of that academic year - fortunately records don't seem to survive :brb:
     
    Last edited: Jan 21, 2017
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  18. Lifeline

    Lifeline South. Supporter Contributor

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    *breaks down laughing*

    You just made my day @big soft moose ! :supergrin:
     
  19. big soft moose

    big soft moose An Admoostrator Admin Staff Supporter Contributor Community Volunteer

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    happy to be of ... ahem... service :D
     
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  20. Lifeline

    Lifeline South. Supporter Contributor

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    And I won't comment on the avg. 30' stuff :supergrin:. What have you guys been doing?? :supercheeky:
     
  21. big soft moose

    big soft moose An Admoostrator Admin Staff Supporter Contributor Community Volunteer

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    I dunno experience since says its certainly possible to take that long, or longer if you hone your tantric skills ;) - but not I'd admit as a horny 19 year old ... but hey four guys sat in the student union aren't going to be particularly honest with themselves or each other about their studly prowess

    ETA : this reminds me of the bit in ATW where smudger claims to deliver 12 inches of pleasure, and Keri asks him if he means 2 inches going in and out 6 times before he loses control of himself :D
     
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  22. Lifeline

    Lifeline South. Supporter Contributor

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    Hah, speaking from my (admittedly non-standard) female perspective, it's not about how long it lasts but about the ... hm .... 'impact' :D
     
  23. big soft moose

    big soft moose An Admoostrator Admin Staff Supporter Contributor Community Volunteer

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    There certainly are other factors but again a bunch of 19 year old lads in a pub are never going to admit that (or know probably). This conversation feels like it should be in the erotica forum :D
     
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  24. Lifeline

    Lifeline South. Supporter Contributor

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    Oh well, I won't go into the specifics then :D But thank you for making my evening very enjoyable indeed *still smiling*
     
  25. big soft moose

    big soft moose An Admoostrator Admin Staff Supporter Contributor Community Volunteer

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    yeah that's what girls used to tell me back then too :supergrin:

    Btw TMW you think impact and wonder if lifeline means you know the physical force of the thrust impacting certain areas or whether its more y' know metaphoric .... however some doors are best left unopened ;)
     
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