Okay, thank you very much. And yes, the story is about "Raul" [who actually has a different name in the real story I'm writing (I just came up with "Raul" as an example for my post in the spur of the moment!)] is telling about his experiences during a certain time in life, almost like a journal. Thanks again for the help!
Thank you. Yes, that's what I'm trying to figure out how to do and make it flow well for the readers. Thanks for the help!
I think that it could also work in an established close third person POV. As long as the reader knows they're inside the character's head, the statement doesn't need, "Joe felt that walking..." I think it could work just fine as you've put it. Edited to add: Also, the present tense statement would be just fine in a past tense book. It's pretty normal to state ongoing facts ("Chicago is in Illinois") in present tense, irrespective of the overall tense of the book.
When I had first read First Person Present Tense, I hated it. My first experience with it was in The Hunger Games. Because of that tense, I almost put the book down. Three years later I'm writing in it. I find it easier and it allows me a certain amount of voice. The characters have a certain thought process and I can explore that with 1st Person/Present Tense. Many people don't like it, but I enjoy it and that's how I write. This isn't my best piece but it's an example of how I write. For me I can't read any difference between writers when it comes to Third Person Limited/Past Tense, so I'd rather not write in that. There's definitely grammatical differences and doing thought is a lot harder. Though if you do Third Person Omniscient, doing an info dump wouldn't be hard. So there's always that plus.
Your example is fine, but it wouldn't have to change to any significant degree to be past tense: “Sure do, we’ll give it a shot.” I heard shouting on the other end of the radio and a moment later there was a set of booms coming from behind me. I turned to look at the ships out on the water and one’s hull completely exploded, sending pieces of metal and wood flying everywhere. Did it work? I turned back towards a landing boat unloading to see the puppets on board just drop their swords and begin to wander aimlessly. Perfect. At a quick count, I changed six characters. Edited to add: I mark 'em, just because: “Sure do, we’ll give it a shot.” I heard shouting on the other end of the radio and a moment later there was a set of booms coming from behind me. I turned to look at the ships out on the water and one’s hull completely exploded, sending pieces of metal and wood flying everywhere. Did it work? I turned back towards a landing boat unloading to see the puppets on board just drop their swords and begin to wander aimlessly. Perfect. I was wrong--nine characters.
Okay here's another piece from the same chapter. Here's a monologue. I absolutely hate writing thoughts in past tense because I've got to add in "I thought" or "He/she thought". Then there was the whole debate a while back about putting thoughts in italics, and the answer from many was "no don't do that". So for me that's harder to separate. So while the piece I posted originally works both ways, monologues are harder.
You don't need either thought tags or italics. This would be just fine as: I pulled on my uniform and ran down the halls, alarms flashing as I went. The hallway was washed in a dim red light and I almost tripped on wires as I ran. This was it. The New Order was marching on us now. But I couldn’t use that name. Here, everyone called them the Death Collegiate. It’s how we scared them into hating the enemy. The word death in their name removed the humanity from them, making them easier to fight. But the bulk of their force wasn’t alive from the start. Edited to add: Again, if you prefer first person present, that's fine. But if you prefer it only because you think that you need this or need that, I want to demonstrate that you don't. Edited to add: And very little change is needed for third person past, either: Joe pulled on his uniform and ran down the halls, alarms flashing as he went. The hallway was washed in a dim red light and he almost tripped on wires as he ran. This was it. The New Order was marching on them now. But he couldn’t use that name. Here, everyone called them the Death Collegiate. It’s how they scared them into hating the enemy. The word death in their name removed the humanity from them, making them easier to fight. But the bulk of their force wasn’t alive from the start.
It's a mix of both. Like now that I'm looking at it (with your corrections), I guess it wouldn't be very difficult. At least for me, straight up writing it I get more done faster and somewhat better work is written in present tense for me. It sounds better to me and is less used. So much is still written in past tense so writing in present tense is fresh and new for me. I also love writing trains of thought. I think I get carried away with it sometimes, but it's really fun to be able to write exactly how I think. But yes, past tense could also work for my piece.
It's not exactly the same, obviously, but you can do something similar in close third (and past tense). "Raul snorted in disgust and let the door slam behind him. It was drizzling out, but that didn't slow him down. Instead, he found himself relaxing, enjoying the simple pleasure of walking in the rain. The smell of rain on gas and concrete was soothing." The first person made it sound more like a universal truth than something that only worked for Raul, of course. For me, I'd say it works in 2nd person, too. "You snort in disgust and let the door slam behind you. It's drizzling out, but that doesn't slow you down. Instead, you find yourself relaxing, enjoying the simple pleasure of walking in the rain. The smell of rain on gas and concrete is soothing."
"Jackson slyly sneaked around the building wall and gingerly pressed his way through the barbed wire surrounding the compound." "Jackson slyly sneaks around the building wall and gingerly presses his way through the barbed wire surrounding the compound." So what would be the correct terminology for the above sentences? First, second, or third tense? Thanks!
Well now we're mixing tenses and PoVs. Both are Third person PoVs. The first one is past tense while the second one is present tense.
Right. I get it now. Thanks! So then 1 person PoV, past tense, would be, "I slyly sneaked around the building..." and 1 person PoV, present tense would be "I slyly sneak around the building..."? So can I mix 1 person PoV, past tense, with 1 person PoV, present tense? Thanks!
Only change tense if there's a reason for it. Like, if you're telling a story within a story, or referring to something that happened at a different time. eg. I sneak around the building, the same way I went in the last time I was here. ("I sneak" = present tense; "I went" = past tense, used b/c the narrator is referring to an event that happened before the events of the story.) You might also change tense between narration and dialogue. eg. I leaned down and whispered, "I love you." ("I leaned" and "whispered" = past tense; "I love"=present tense, used because the narration is past tense but that doesn't affect the words used by characters.) But just a random switch for no reason? eg. I sneaked around the building and press my way through the barbed wire? Nope. Doesn't work. Don't do it.
Okay. I've started my story where in the first chapter the character is writing in his journal. In the second chapter, I wanted to go back in time with him sort of "narrating" his childhood, then later on, go back to him writing in his journal again. Then I wanted to continue on from there, him sort of narrating his actions as he's doing them. I'm not sure if it would all work, though....
Those sound like valid reasons to change tense, and even to change POV. Just make sure you're consistent within each section and have clear breaks between them.
Awesome! Thank you. That's good to know that I can change PoV (with caution, of course) too. That would help a lot. Thanks @BayView!
Both. It took me a while to get used to reading first person/present tense because I wasn't used to it. At first I hated it but I grew to like it over time. When my writing picked up and I got ready to write the most recent draft of my manuscript, I picked The Hunger Games up for some reason again and read it. I said "I actually think I could write like this!" And then I switched from first person past tense (Which was really bad the way I did it) to first person present tense. I enjoy it so much more.
Ultramar, I shall refer to you as Ultra Smurf. As for the actually post, they make valid points. Although I find writing in past tense easier for me sense that's what I've done for the past three months of writing. It seems off to me when writing, "He began walking." instead of "He walked" or one that I can't think of how to put in present tense, "He sliced through the air, his blade glistened a bright red as it met the target." That said, I'm not very skilled at present tense writing. Although I have read a few that I enjoy.
I'm not sure where "Ultra Smurf" came from but I'll live with it! I have yet to see good third person present tense. I mean as the PoV narrates "Jake walks over and picks up the sword, staring into my soul" with 'Justin' as our PoV it works, but I've never seen "Jake walks over and picks up the sword, staring into Justin's soul" as Third Person Omniscient. I'm sure it works but it seems... off... to me. It may be something with me but I'm sure it's possible. My combos usually would be Third Person/Past Tense or First Person/Present Tense. I used First Person/Past Tense for a time but I didn't like it and I think I did it horribly wrong.
Your name (Ulramar) Sounds a lot like Ultramar from Warhammer 40k. And the Ultra Marines are called Ultra Smurfs by everyone since they're the poster boys of 40k and they're blue. That said, I've haven't read a Third Person/Present Tense. Although I'm horrific with First Person. With First Person/Present Tense I can do. Also... I believe the Pendragon series uses First Person/Past Tense.
Ultramar was actually where I pulled the name Ulramar I get the Ultra Smurfs reference now lol. There's no reason to cause yourself unnessessary pains. If you can write in Past Tense/Third Person and you do it well, do it. If you can do just as well or better in First Person/Present Tense, do that. Now if you can do First Person/Past Tense, do that. But I'll have to check out the Pendragon series because I haven't seen First Person/PAst Tense done well anywhere so far.
That works pretty well, but second person lets you use the imperative mood and rhetorical questions: "You snort in disgust. The door slams behind you. It's drizzling outside. Wait -- smell that? Rain on grass and concrete. Mmm. Soak it in. Just relax and let the rain wash over you as you walk away. Use past when narrating his actions that happen before he starts writing. Use present to narrate actions that interrupt his writing, or to narrate his act of writing. ("So now I sit here alone, writing about my feelings -- someone's at the door.") Or if he is doing something while writing about it (I imagine a scientist running an experiment), use present but make sure you have a clear mental scene and you know when he picks up the pencil and when he puts it down. In general, to move around the timeline when writing in past tense, I recommend putting a chapter break or a horizontal line / extra space / centered star on a new line / whichever symbol you use. At the beginning of a scene, provide enough information for the reader to know when it takes place. It could be as simple as "On September 16, ..." or "Three weeks later, ..." or as subtle as a hint at which season it is."
