1. AltarianX
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    AltarianX New Member

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    7 Deadly Sins-Suggestions and Opinions appreciated

    Discussion in 'Plot Development' started by AltarianX, Feb 25, 2011.

    Hey everyone, My names AltarianX and i just recently joined the forums, Im excited that there is a discussion board for people who right their own fantasy stories and the like, and that i can be a part of said community.

    Im currently trying to write a story about the 7 Deadly Sins being personified, or living beings. I have figured out a basic idea of what i want to do with the story but my problem is shuld i make it modern day or fantasy, and exactly how i should go about writing it.
    Now granted, its going on 2 am here where i live, So i dont have my notes in front of me. But heres a basic idea
    You have the seven deadly sins as human beings in a society/world. Each is in control of a major industry/area of ther "expertise" meaning what they stand for. Lust is prostitution/sex, wrath is fighting rings/mob, sloth is slave trade/labor camps (due to a slothful person not doing work themselves)
    one issue ive found is finding a thing for PRIDe to be in control of.
    So heres my ?'s
    1) Modern Day or Fantasy
    2) ideas/Suggestions on how to start the story off or How to write it
    3) "Expertise" or Industry for Pride to be in control of

    One idea from a friend of mine, who may very well be a co writer was to have ENVY be the main character and Kill off the other 6 sins, and clomax the story with the discovery of he/she doing it out of envy
    but i dont know how i feel about it.

    Ideas? Suggestions? Opinions? all are welcome and appreciated
    Ill try to post my actual concept notes and ideas tommorow (=
     
  2. Leonardo Pisano
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    Leonardo Pisano Active Member

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    Welcome here where the blind help the lame :)

    I think your story is doable in modern times. Maybe you can combine with a Pandora's Box equivalent (prologue?). How you do want to end, though, is a mystery. Maybe a bad ending -- they remain existing, part of the dark side of human character.
     
  3. tristan.n
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    tristan.n Active Member

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    Your idea is very interesting, I have to say. You could make Pride rule over religion or be a politician (to me, pride brings to mind the people who try to push their beliefs and ideas on others), but some people may take offense to that idea, so do it at your own risk if you like it... lol
    If you don't want one main character (which may be a little tough since there are seven), you could start off the story with a sort of day-in-the-life of each character and then weave them together. I don't know your style of writing or what styles you like, so it's hard to say.
    And for the first question, which I'm responding to lastly for some reason, I think you could do either setting. Are these people going to be normal in a sense, or are you planning on adding a magic element or something (besides the fact that they represent the seven deadly sins, of course)?
     
  4. spamalope01
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    spamalope01 Member

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    I'm digging the idea.

    Pride could be in charge of cosmetics, or plastic surgery...or modeling...the fashion industry....or in charge of film/hollywood....or own a massive nightclub, you know, one of the ones where only the most beautiful can get in....?

    I definitely think that it's doable in modern times. But as far as how to start it off...hmm....I can't offer any suggestions without knowing more about the plot you have in your head. I don't really agree with your friend about the Envy angle, I'm not sure that would be enough....I mean, I can see it, but I'm not sure it would make this story a page turner (it would be hard for readers to care about these characters....hell, Sloth is in charge of slave labor!).

    How to start the story hinges totally on the story itself. As humans, what are these sins doing?
     
  5. AltarianX
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    AltarianX New Member

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    Ok, So now that its not ridiculously late and i have some time to respond, Here are my notes;

    General:
    The 7 Deadly Sins, named as Lust,Pride,Wrath,Sloth,Greed,Gluttony & Envy live in a personified form. Where they exist, the qualities of their sin is amplified in people, more than the normal amount that they exist already.

    Each sin's personified form is the epiphany of the sin.
    For example Lust is referenced as being the sin of pleasure, most often sexual. So the personified form of lust, which in my case is a woman, would bring out the most sexual desires in people around her, particularly those she talks to directly.
    -The twist, Is lust has a fetish of killing people she encounters sexually, all for the sake of pleasure.

    Breakdown of Sins and their "Industries"
    Lust: Prostitution,Brothels,Courtesans
    Wrath: Fighting Rings, Security, Law enforcement, Soldiers
    Greed: Banks, Money,Gambling
    Sloth:Slave trade,Labor Camps (<==== Suggestions on this too please)
    Envy: Thieves Guilds, Possibly associated with/partner of greed
    Gluttony: Tobacco/Entertainment/Food--Essentially Hedonism at its finest
    Pride: Religion and Government (Thanks to all for the feedback and suggestions, I will keep them in mind, especially the Night club/cosmetics idea)

    Possible that the personified forms are all unified in a "Council" of seven, maybe having an 8th member included(Lucifer reference, i imagine) and they are in control of "industries" because their respective followers largest sin is one of the seven. (Again, Lust is about sexual desire, so Lust followers would be prostitutes or sex addicts etc)

    I still dont know exactly how id like to set the story up, but at one point i was thinking about killing the personifications off and at least for the modern day style of the story i figured out how i would want them killed.

    As always, Suggestions, Feedback and opinions are welcome (=
     
  6. Mallory
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    Mallory Mallegory. Contributor

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    One thing that comes to mind is that you need a protagonist. As it's been mentioned, it's going to be hard to make us like your 7 deadly sin characters, unless you give a relatable reason to explain the way they are: and even then it'll only go so far. Sure I could be friends with the lust girl, but not the slave owner or power-toting sleazy politician.

    The protag is the POV character, not necessarily the "good guy," but it still needs to be a relatable person. The 7 deadly sins seem more big-picture, abstract, personifications of issues -- more like forces acting in your plot than main characters.

    Here's what I'd be fleshing out if I were you. When these 7 individuals get together (or affect each other, or whatever) and things start happening, what events will unfold? Who will be affected? What will be that person's motive, goals, etc?
     
  7. spamalope01
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    spamalope01 Member

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    I wonder if a dual modern and old/fantasy setting would be doable....flashbacks....maybe back in the day (the old/fantasy setting) these characters entered into a pact/wager..maybe a power struggle to see who could amass the most followers or tempt certain things...control certain things that would shape humankind towards *their* particular sin....lust wanted everyone in the world to be sexual...basically have a large orgy or live a la ancient rome where sex was rampant....cut to modern times and the terms of the bet/pact have come to a head. ?? the protagonist could be a key figure (or figures) that the sins are trying to sway or control....

    just a quick thought before i go home for the weekend. have fun!
     
  8. Dauracul
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    Dauracul Member

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    I love it. Has a very 'Metal Gear Solid' feel to it I think.

    You could easily make this a very surreal, psychological horror / thriller plot. Envy, for example, could be a psychotic (or even a group of them) who go around stealing identities and so on (someone has what they want, so they take it). For an added horror twist you could have them kill those people and like, wear their faces (literally).

    I personally love the idea of the main character turning out to be one of the sins. Although if not done properly it could probably be guessed at very early in the book.
     
  9. KillianRussell
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    KillianRussell Contributing Member

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    "I'd be fleshing out if I were you. When these 7 individuals get together (or affect each other, or whatever) and things start happening, what events will unfold? Who will be affected? What will be that person's motive, goals, etc? "

    BINGO ....TOUCHDOWN
     
  10. Cogito
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    Cogito Former Mod, Retired Supporter Contributor

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    A story concept means nothing. I can tell you now, it has all been done before. What matters is how you write it, the characterization, the flow, the imagery, all of it.

    There's no benefit in asking what other people think of the concept! They'll either say,"Sounds great," or, "it sounds like a ripoff of..."

    If the idea stirs you, write it. Then ask people what they think of the final story. After they tell you what they don't like about it, revise it, usually several times, until you're happy with it or until you throw up your hands and say the hell with it.

    Please read What is Plot Creation and Development?
     
  11. tristan.n
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    tristan.n Active Member

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    Maybe for sloth you could have that person be the head of a big business or something like a (cough) oil company (cough cough) if you don't like the slave trade/labor camp thing.
    P.S. I like lust's "justification" for killing people.
     
  12. nhope
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    nhope Contributing Member Reviewer

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    What if you picked a central theme (industry) and have each react to that. For example, if you picked prostitution, how would sloth, pride, gluttony react when confronted with it? It may be easier to write as each sin would have to stay in character without merging with another (not easy), unless, the outcome is that no one reigns, they are indeed blended, as we have them all within ourselves. You would retain your main focus and not become overwhelmed with trying to tie so many industries together.

    Great idea, by the way.
     
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  13. Leonardo Pisano
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    Leonardo Pisano Active Member

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    Brilliant post, nhope! You can probably link all seven to this single industry. Any Big industry would do (think Banks, Oil, Pharma). These three are interrelated anyway.
     
  14. AltarianX
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    AltarianX New Member

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    The seperate industries were more for the idea of it being a fantasy story. Im still 50 50 on which setting id like it to be, But i did start forming the modern day. Oil would work for sloth, ill keep it in mind, but when i think Oil Companies, i think money,a nd money brings greed to mind.
    Thank you fro the compliment on the depth of lust and her "justification" id like to bring that kind of depth to each.
    THe problemn with fantasy is trying to make it more "magic" esque.
    I liked the suugeestion of the Pandoras Box spin, and the idea of the personifications leaving and the sin still being in the world. Very movie like :D
     
  15. AltarianX
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    AltarianX New Member

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    i think what i might do is do a cross between modern and fantasy, witht he actual setting be a modern day, but have ""flashbacks" to the past. Going with the idea that "Sins dont die, they just live in people" kind of. So it could start with the sins asa council in the past, then have flashbacks to where they died in the past. Maybe the MC could have dreams or something to see these flashbacks.
     

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