1. assassins creed
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    assassins creed Banned

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    Advice on best way to research information on child abusers

    Discussion in 'Research' started by assassins creed, Aug 26, 2008.

    If you have read my previous thread about abuse by teachers you will understand why I am seeking advice on this topic. I am specifically seeking it on a personal basis as I would like to track down the teacher who abused me when I was a child. By tracking him down, I can confront him face to face, tell him how he made my life hell, even to this day.

    Doing this will hopefully rid me of those nightmares I have been suffering for the past thirty years. these inner demons that are torturing me have to be put to rest so this is my one and only chance to attempt to do it before it is too late.

    I would appreciate any information on the best way to seek out this individual, but I know if you have any information it will be general not specific. Thanking you all in advance.

    Assassins Creed :confused::confused:
     
  2. wackerob
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    wackerob Banned

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    The best way I can think of to research things like this is to either google it, check out your library for info. You could even ask for a voters registration of the area he lives in (if you know) or your could even go to the police and ask them for assistance. It would be better if you had your psychologist do it, so she can say it's a healing process, you have to go through to forgive him.

    Something like that anyhow. maybe somebody else has a better solution.

    wackerob:)
     
  3. Cogito
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    Cogito Former Mod, Retired Supporter Contributor

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    The problem with researching this subject is the sheer volume of informatiopn to wade through, scattered with land mines planted by people with agendas.

    I don't know the depth or accuracy you will require, but you could have a great deal of reading to do, and plenty of critical analysis to weed out the BS and the exaggereations (on both sides).
     
  4. assassins creed
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    assassins creed Banned

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    Thank you for your comments Cognito,

    I realize there will be stacks of reading material for me to sift through, but even having it may be helpful. As it may have some small piece of information that I could use down the line. Who knows the significance of what might come out of it.

    Again Cognito, I appreciate what you said and I will take your advice on board.
     
  5. mammamaia
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    mammamaia nit-picker-in-chief Contributor

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    finding someone isn't all that hard, if you can afford a few bucks to one of the better tracking service sites that abound on the net... and i don't see what paperwork you'd have to wade through, even if you did the tracking on your own...

    the teacher has a name... you have that and an approximate age... and he taught at your school in xxxx year/s... he had to be certified or licensed, or whatever they do in ireland and those records still exist... he would have known and been known to other teachers... he had to live somewhere and there are phone book listings still in existence from 30 years ago...

    police records may show other victims had reported this guy, even if you hadn't... plus, there are also death records you can check and he could well have passed on by now...

    doing detective work on your own will be time-consuming and frustrating, since you won't have the relatively easy access to records a P.I. or net-based service will, so if you're really determined to do this, your best bet is to let someone who knows how, do it for you...

    but if/when you find him i strongly caution you not to approach him directly... if what he did to you was a crime, report it and his current whereabouts to the police, or at least to an organization that seeks redress for victims, instead of putting yourself in physical and/or legal jeopardy... to accuse him of molestation at this late date without any solid proof can bring the law down on your head, not his... and/or he can sue you for libel/slander or any number of other costly-to-defend civil torts...

    i'm sorry to hear of your suffering, but you did survive it and if you can't find this guy, it's probably time now, for you to let go of both those memories and your need for revenge...

    if you've been seeing a counselor for this, what does/did s/he have to say about your need to confront the individual?

    love and healing hugs, maia
     
  6. Ungood
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    Ungood Contributing Member

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    I am with mammamaia on this one.

    I would just contact the school or look up an old year book to find the person's name, and then with the name intact contact a person finding agency. Should cost a few euros, but not more then a good dinner, but I have no idea how that works in Ireland.

    Be warned you might be charged with harassment, as the teacher may very well not viewed what they did as 'abuse' especially if it was within the limitations allowed by law.

    I know that Catholic schools in the united states allow the teachers to use physical discipline on the students and the parents must sign a waver to send their child to the school.
     
  7. Cogito
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    Cogito Former Mod, Retired Supporter Contributor

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    I really misread this. I thought you were looking for general information, not info on s specific person.

    Sorry. Mammamaia's advice is sound.
     
  8. assassins creed
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    assassins creed Banned

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    Thank you everybody for you kind comments. Just to let you all know, I do not seek revenge. However I do wish to know how I go about seeking out an individual, so I can confront him with what he has done to me.

    By doing this and letting him know how hurtful he was to me, may help me to put these demons to rest. As I can't go on living my in fear of these nightmares. Even if I managed to get this person to admit he was wrong and say he was sorry, would make me feel I have accomplished my goal.

    Cognito, you did not misread it the first time around, I know that everyone here may not be able to talk specifics, so I asked if they possibly can give me some general information on how I would go about getting information on someone.

    Again thanks everyone for your supportive comments and I am glad you could be of some help, with what you have already said to me. Thanks

    Assassins Creed
     
  9. mammamaia
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    mammamaia nit-picker-in-chief Contributor

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    ac...
    if the abuse was sexual and thus criminal, there may not be any statute of limitations on that in your country and if so, you could report it to the police, IF you have any way to prove it, such as witnesses... if it was a catholic school and the teacher was a priest, you can also seek redress from the diocese...
     
  10. NaCl
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    NaCl Contributing Member Contributor

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    Keep preaching the good word of pacifism, Maia. Maybe some day, mankind's evil shadows will be vanquished by the light of such philosophy.
     
  11. mammamaia
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    mammamaia nit-picker-in-chief Contributor

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    i wish it were that easy, salty... but the sad truth is that the evil you and your loved ones have experienced first-hand is only one of many that are too deeply embedded in this species to ever be eradicated completely... and, like that single rotten apple in a barrel full of good ones, even should my 'preaching' work on most [which would take a major miracle], the few it missed would eventually reestablish evil's hold on the race...

    fatalist?... sure, but also realistic and eyes-wide-open honesty, even when it hurts...

    i'm so glad for you, that you didn't have a chance to give in to revenge [which even i would probably be tempted to commit, if it were one of my children or grandchildren], and of course it's disgusting and disheartening to know he's free to harm more victims... pieces of merde like that should be locked up for life!

    love and healing hugs to you and yours, maia

    ps: you might like to read the first of an eventual 6 collections of my work that i've had printed, 'a mother's guide to clean-living in a dirty universe'... it's free for anyone who wants it, along with the second, 'on the path to matera'... next to come will be 'in whose name?' that deals with mankind's various dreamt-up gods and religions... just email me [ maia3maia@hotmail.com ] if you'd like me to send you one... the offer's open to everyone, of course... m
     
  12. destroyer
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    destroyer Banned

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    My god Assassin you've certainly been through the mill. Like maia and the rest of the gang I commend you for trying to put the past behind you. It is disgusting what that teacher has done to you, all that pain and suffering he also caused you.

    destroyer
     
  13. assassins creed
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    assassins creed Banned

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    Destroyer thank you.
    Maia thank you also for your vote of confidence and I would like you to email me your book. You already have my email as I was "conversing" with you before about a story I was writing, but I was a little confused with the tenses. It was about a girl named Emily who is laid up in bed imaging scene of a beach. She then reflects into her past about her best friend Susan Mc Donnell. How she is always fooling around in the water and drowned.

    Assassins Creed
     
  14. mammamaia
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    mammamaia nit-picker-in-chief Contributor

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    i recall your piece well, ac... i never thought of sending the ms for my books by email, but since i send it to the printer that way, can certainly send it to you... it just won't be all together, as i imagine an e-book would be...

    but i don't know what your email address 'name' is, so can't find it in my address book... and your work would be in my files under your real name, so you'll have to email me first...

    hugs, m
     
  15. assassins creed
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    assassins creed Banned

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    Thank you maia, I have just sent you an email so you can reply

    Assassins Creed
     

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