As a reader, would you be convinced by this?

Discussion in 'Character Development' started by CMastah, Jan 10, 2015.

  1. BayView

    BayView Huh. Interesting. Contributor

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    I guess I'll be a contrary voice, here, but I can see it working.

    I recently listened to Sebastian Junger's War, and while he's an outsider and I'm an outsider, it felt like a pretty compelling look into the military mindset.

    The soldiers he interviewed (and lived with, embedded with them off and on for over a year) certainly had the bond Wreybies is talking about, but they were also completely aware of the Rules of Engagement and followed them, even when frustrated by them. And the officers, at least in his version, didn't seem to be quite as much a part of the fraternity as the enlisted men.

    So, say your Captain has achieved her rank away from the front lines. She's a by-the-rules, idealistic, naive officer. Her encounter with the animal-people is part of her first tour in the real action, and she protests that the men are violating the Rules of Engagement, they're undisciplined, etc. She's already been in conflict with her superior officer, the one who ordered the attack - he's a sort of Colonel Jessup type, old-school and unorthodox but with a strong reputation. She's Tom Cruise's character, having coasted along most of her life, not really engaging but getting along because she's good at paperwork and making a good impression.

    She sees the massacre, confronts Colonel Jessup about it, and he blows her off. Laughs at her. She can't handle the truth, etc.

    If she were your MC, I'd want her to stand up to him a prove him wrong, but if she's a secondary character? Let him beat her. Maybe she really can't handle the truth. She goes out and realizes she's lost the soldiers' respect, she knows she's messed things up with the colonel, and honestly, this war thing isn't what she thought it was. She'd been expecting clarity and found confusion. She doesn't like it, and she wants out. Conveniently, your society allows that!

    I'd believe it. She's not quitting b/c of the animal-people, exactly - she's quitting b/c of what the incident showed her about herself.
     
  2. Chinspinner

    Chinspinner Contributor Contributor

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    Likewise, it works for me. Just think William Defoe in Platoon (I know he gets murdered, but he could have just as easily deserted despite being battle hardened).

    I can see her fighting on the front line, thoroughly battle hardened and then one day she sees just one too many things she does not like, maybe she suffers some sort of PCSD, or a simple realisation that the war is futile. Maybe she goes native, who knows; but all or any of these things could feasibly happen.
     
  3. CMastah

    CMastah Active Member

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    The thing about the world is it's ESSENTIALLY peaceful, but there's one dark force that humans are at war with (it's a rift in a specific location, no battling goes on anywhere else). The four ruling families are united through a bond and they keep their kingdoms peaceful (not out of benevolence though), hence her and MANY others did not achieve their position through bloodshed. She got it because her graduation from appropriate universities gave her a head start over others who did not have the same benefit, and then time led to her promotion (she'd never have seen battle anyway).

    Honestly, I'd imagined the scene a long time ago but when it came time to put it down on paper....I realized how insane she'd have to be , because she wouldn't be quitting over the massacre of innocent 'people' :/
     
  4. Nilfiry

    Nilfiry Senior Member

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    She is a Captain! That is a pretty high military officer rank (O-6). She would probably be able to do a lot more to change things by staying in the military than just suddenly quitting. That is the logic I see here.
     

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