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  1. Banzai
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    Banzai One-time Mod, but on the road to recovery Contributor

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    Baywriter - the HUNDREDTH Poetry Contest Winner

    Discussion in 'Bi-Weekly Poetry Contest Archives' started by Banzai, Dec 2, 2009.

    Remember When You Were
    By Baywriter


    I see you each day
    by the streetlight,
    in a corner. Right at my neck.
    Over there. Everywhere.
    Never there.
    When you were,
    in June
    “I became a goddess wrapped
    in translucent scarves
    of provocative color.
    No man would resist.”
    “… it excited me.”
    “I was the luster of desire,
    gleaming brighter each time
    I unveiled new skin.”
    I remember. Everywhere.
    You said:
    “You will always
    Belong
    To
    Me.
    Those other men are nothing.”
    So was I. Your response:
    “The kingdom is aloft,
    and rose vines are my latter.
    Meet my blood at each handle;
    kisses on a petal aren't enough
    to hold me steady:
    I am plunging.
    Ice castles, floating wonder,
    pass me by, and by again.
    Underneath birch trees,
    I am reaching.
    And falling.
    Bitter calls press my lips,
    But I cannot stop.
    Stop the thorns on my flesh.
    It hurts.
    I need it.”
    I did not in July
    when
    “my body began to
    disintegrate beneath him.
    I couldn’t
    feel
    myself
    .”
    “I began my descent
    devoid of hesitation,
    falling into his form,
    the blackened lines
    and shaded sectors clinging
    to my body like a new lover.”
    “I wasn’t
    some
    whore.”
    Y
    O
    U
    “Punch, I punch back.
    Wanna die?
    Want it, fight for it.”
    Oh, scarlet and concrete
    Meeting in a dirty, infected kiss.
    Leave me. Leave me to burn.

    Angel, you called me.
    Dead angel. High angel.
    Won’t you lie, Angel?
    Just one more time, Angel.
    And then
    you were gone.
    Now.
    Never here. Over there.
    It could not be helped.
     
  2. Gannon
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    Gannon Contributing Member Contributor

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    Deserved congratulations! Well done Baywriter. Great poem. Care to explain the bolding choice? :)
     
  3. Evil Flamingo
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    Evil Flamingo Contributing Member Contributor

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    I knew this one had it for the win as soon as I read it, well deserved. Great poem Baywriter.

    - Steve
     
  4. Jewels In Autumn
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    Jewels In Autumn Member

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    Enjoyed reading it immensely~
    Bravo!
     
  5. Baywriter
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    Baywriter Contributing Member Contributor

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    Thanks everyone! :D

    The bold words are a separate voice within the poem, showing the transformation of the true character, since it's so obscure throughout the rest of the piece.
     
  6. Lydia
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    Lydia Contributing Member Contributor

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    Congrats, Baywriter, well done. :)
     
  7. Palmer
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    Palmer Senior Member

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    Very picturesque and vivid. :) A style worth my emulation. Congrats! :D
     
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  8. becca
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    becca New Member Contributor

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    Congratz Baywriter on your win!
     
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