1. Buttered Toast
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    Buttered Toast Active Member

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    Beta read for first 2 chapters please

    Discussion in 'Collaboration' started by Buttered Toast, Sep 12, 2016.

    Hi,
    I'm a bit shy when it comes to asking people to read my works as I'm Dyslexic, although this hasn't stopped me from writing an 80k book.
    would anyone be interested in reading a story crossed between Harry Potter, Alice in Wonderland, The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe?

    I had a personal connection to the Harry Potter series as I boarded for 5 years at school.
    I really want someone to confirm to me that my story is not too much like the Harry Potter series and just general help.
    The only thing I can see in common is that it's based in a boarding school and magic is involved.
    The Synopsis:
    Jack Stark is a 13 year old half Necromancer and Pyromancer Mage living with his mother in a tiny caravan towed by an old red mini. Like all Mages they live a life of secrecy until one day the six Royal Mages, the all powerful rulers of the Mages, decide it is time to let the world know about their existence, to the horror of the No-Mage, humans with no magical powers.
    An Academy is built for young Mages to join but before Jack could join a shadowy figure try's to stop him, he looses the one person who has supported him his entire life and is saved by an elderly blackeyed woman and her butler Zombie, Ted.
    What was that shadowy figure and why did the elderly woman save him? Mysterious things continue to happen, he must overcome the possibility of being placed in the wrong Academy House, learn how to control two powers and stop a curse from destroying him and the world.


    I have pictures of all the characters if you want to see, let me know if your interested in reading it, I can give you the first two chapters and you can tell me if you want to read more.
    Thanks for you time

    I'm more than happy to help anyone else if they need a reader x
    Laura
     
    Last edited: Sep 12, 2016
  2. Brindy
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    Brindy Contributing Member Supporter

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    Hi, I'm happy to take a look for you and give you some feedback.
     
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  3. Buttered Toast
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    Buttered Toast Active Member

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    That is so lovely of you, I can't thank you enough! I honestly thought no one would be interested!
    When I'm home tonight after work I can send them over to you, can you message me your email address :)
     
  4. Cave Troll
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    Cave Troll Bite the bullet, do your own thing. Contributor

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    Sounds like something I might find entertaining after a fashion. So count me in as well Toasty. :)

    It has been a while since I have beta read anything. Be a nice change of pace while I am stuck in
    a rut with my own works. So send it over and I will get it on the slab, and then back to you with
    my diagnoses. :supergrin:
     
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  5. Buttered Toast
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    Buttered Toast Active Member

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    Thank you so much, I'm so grateful, send me a message with your email and I will pop a copy over :)
     

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