I'd rather a stranger read my pieces because they would give a book-buyer-pov. For critiques I never liked the idea of only one person voicing an opinion when a collection of a few gives a better balance. Critiques can be hard to take, harder still if the piece is close to you.
My husband and I have issues with this question as well. He is currently working on a YA novel and asks me to read everything he writes. This has definitely been a bit of an issue of us and has occasionally ended in heated arguments. But, he continues to ask for my critiques (glutton for punishment?). He knows that I will be honest and straight forward. I almost always have a lot of negative things to say, but I am working on expressing positive opinions in my critiques as well. What has helped us the most in this process is that he has learned to ask me specific questions about what he wants to hear. Is this character well-rounded? Does this plot turn make sense? And if he's looking for a bit of a morale boost, he will tell me (before I read the piece) that he is looking for what is working, rather than a long, tortuous list of what isn't.
Is this a person you can trust? Would you know without a second guess that this person's critique is just that, an assessment of the writing and questions about what you meant when you wrote that just the way you did? Or do you walk on eggshells, fire, or even broken seashells when they say, 'Honey, that story was very good.' If handled well, your relationship will grow and your writing will improve. if not, you will be getting a new friend.
Excellent question. It depends on a number of things. How strong the relationship is, how well you each take to being criticized, how well you give criticism etc. You won't be able to avoid being bias. But what it all boils down to, and where the potential is routed, Is which direction the bias will lean; you could either be biased toward making the other feel good about themselves and their work, or toward helping the other beecome the best writer they can be. but its all love -nate
I think it depends on the personality of the significant other. Is he or she capable of giving an honest critique, or too afraid of hurting feelings? For that matter, are you good at accepting criticism from your significant other? Because that can be a factor, too. It can work, Stephen King always gives what he writes to his wife first, because she gives honest critiques.
i always advise new writers to never show their work to friends, family, or anyone they're sleeping with... doing so too often leads to problems in relationships and/or to following bad advice from those not knowledgeable enough writing/publishing-wise...
Agree, but not entirely because they might not know a lot. Because they tend to lean towards always [and I mean always] giving you good critiques, no matter if your work really is good, or stinks. I once showed my work to my old colleague a few years ago, who's a writer now, and he said it was excellent. A few months later, I showed him another piece, and he again said it was excellent. It turned out to have 147 grammar errors (according to MS word), and 23 spelling errors (again, MS word).
It really depends on the person and perhaps your relationship to them. It's just as possible for a stranger to give an untruthful critique for fear of being unpolite as close friends, family and/or colleagues are to give you objective ones because they want your work to shine. If your critiquer is a writer and someone close to you, bias in my opinion may not factor into their response at all. Again, it depends on the individual.
your 'not entirely...etc.' is why i wrote 'and/or'... and i have to disagree with 'always...good critiques'... the potential danger to relationships comes from the fact that if the friend/relative/lover/spouse is honest and points out flaws, the writer's ego can suffer to the point where the relationship can suffer a change for the worse... believe me, this does happen!
A writer has to learn to deal with critiques. If they can't manage that, how will they deal with editors, either rejections or when editors recommend changes to a mansucript? How will the writer deal with less than favorable reviews of their published works? Beyond the personal struggles and 'ego shattering' that could occur (but in my opinion shouldn't even be an issue--a writer has to have a thick skin), poor/unprofessional responses to editors and/or reviews can torpedo a writer's budding career.
Everyone is biased. But everything you can do to eliminate IDENTIFIABLE bias is a good idea, with one possible exception. If your worst enemy critiques your writing, he or she will point out everything at all questionable. Your enemy may well dig out the problems no one else notices, or is to kind to say. So these may well be your most useful critiques.
which is why i advise my mentees to read over their work as if they were their own worst enemy... or, put the other way 'round, as if it was written by someone they really didn't like...
