1. T.Trian
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    T.Trian Overly Pompous Bastard Staff Supporter Contributor

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    Come vs. Cum

    Discussion in 'Erotica' started by T.Trian, Aug 7, 2014.

    So, which is it? I've heard that some editors use "come" as a verb to indicate the act of orgasming whereas they use "cum" as a noun to signify male or female ejaculate. Then again, I've seen plenty of authors (and probably some editors as well) avoid "cum" altogether and use "come" for both purposes, claiming "cum" is what you see in the stories in Penthouse etc.

    What do you folks say? Does "cum" have any place in "proper" literature?
     
  2. jazzabel
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    jazzabel Contributing Member Contributor

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    I don't really know, to be honest. I think 'cum' raises porn flags, more than anything, and in context, 'come' gets the point across just as well, so maybe it's an unspoken rule?
     
  3. daemon
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    daemon Contributing Member Contributor

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    "I'm coming!"

    "I'm cumming!"

    "I came way too soon."

    I am still inconclusive. But I do know that "cum" does not make me think of porn any more than "dick" makes me think of porn.
     
  4. FallenShandeh
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    FallenShandeh Member

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    I hate the word 'cum'. I actually hate most slang words for ejaculate, but I also hate calling it that in something that's meant to be erotic. It's a dilemma.

    'Cum' is the worst crime, though, because the editor in me feels like it's spelled incorrectly. It's not a word I like to see when I'm reading and I never use it when I'm writing. Yes, that does pose some challenges when it comes to writing erotic scenes.
     
  5. Adenosine Triphosphate
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    Adenosine Triphosphate Old Scratch Contributor

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    Define "proper".
     
  6. Mike Hill
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    Mike Hill Natural born citizen of republic of Finland.

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    I would come much rather than cum if you understand what I'm saying. All kidding aside I think that if author uses cum he tries to appiel to young audience. "Look at me I used cum rather than come! I'n not a fossil like other writers".
     
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  7. Acanthophis
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    Acanthophis ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Contributor

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    In my reading experiences 'come' is much better. It makes the writing look better and gives it a more erotic feeling - that's obviously what you're going for, isn't it?

    Cum is for porn, it's dirty and there is nothing erotic about it. It's fake, it's for kids talking about their first sexual experience and saying "man I had her cumming so hard!" I've always thought of it as an ego booster.

    As for a proper place in literature, I guess it honestly does depend on your writing style. I could see myself switching between the two when writing say a 30 year old woman (come) and a 15 year old boy (cum) in the same story. I feel like it would add a bit mor depth to their personalities.
     
  8. T.Trian
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    T.Trian Overly Pompous Bastard Staff Supporter Contributor

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    That seems to be the most common view among writers: only use "cum" in an immature or lowbrow character's dialogue or thoughts.

    I was just surprised some editors actually use "cum" for the substance, ejaculate. Oh well, if the common consensus is to use "come" for both, verb and noun, act and substance, so be it. I've always used "come" for both since "cum" just looks wrong, but I had a spell of uncertainty because of those damn editors. Then again, I could live with "cum" if I had to; no strong preference either way, but to my amateur eyes, "come" just looks and feels better in both instances.

    Thanks all for your input. Another display of this place's usefulness. :cool: Anyway, I got what I wanted from this thread, but if anyone has further comments, questions or whatever, that's what this thread is here for.
     
  9. cutecat22
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    cutecat22 The Strange One Contributor

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    I would go with come.
     
  10. Nilfiry
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    Nilfiry Contributing Member

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    I say use "cum" only in dialogue, and use "come" everywhere else.
     
  11. Acanthophis
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    Acanthophis ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Contributor

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    I actually kind of like it more for the substance though, to be completely honest. I think if directly talking about the substance I'd go with cum, but if I'm talking about the action of doing so, I'd go with come/coming.

    Now I have to try writing a sex scene to see which I prefer. Damnit. :p
     
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  12. tionA
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    tionA Active Member

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    how uncouth a topic...
     
  13. Lae
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    Lae Contributing Member Contributor

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    doesnt bother me which is used to be honest, although i agree the use of either should probably be restricted to dialogue. There must be alternatives to describe outside of dialogue

    @T.Trian had a question, he asked, people answered. If you didnt like the topic from way up there then why did you click on the thread?
     
    Last edited: Aug 8, 2014
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  14. cutecat22
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    cutecat22 The Strange One Contributor

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    @Lae
    You mentioned using cum as dialogue, would you use the phrase "I'm cumming" (spelled either way) in the dialogue of a sex scene?

    I did and got mixed thoughts from my test readers. Some thought it cliched and odd while others liked the fact that I'd actually used the phrase.
     
  15. Lae
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    Lae Contributing Member Contributor

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    I would, people say it. I like natural dialogue, it should feel flowing. Was the objection to the word or to the use? some folks are taken aback by words they consider "uncouth" :p

    The cliché part is up to you, i don't like avoiding something because it might be cliché, if it feels right and fits with the style of writing then go for it. I'd imagine a lot of people say it, some probably right now! It's popular.
     
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  16. jannert
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    jannert Contributing Member Supporter Contributor

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    Personally, I'd use 'come.' You can't really go wrong with it. 'Cum' conveys the feel of ...I don't know ...childishness? In the sense of snicker snicker hee-hee-hee...maybe seems childish because the word 'come' is spelled 'wrong?' However, whatever you feel suits your writing best. Cum is certainly a word you see a lot more often these days.
     
  17. cutecat22
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    cutecat22 The Strange One Contributor

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    I'm not sure why some thought it cliche. I suppose it's also down to the way you handle the sex scene in general as a writer. Do you write every move, every noise, every moan, groan, growl and grunt?

    I've used the phrase I'm coming, in one scene I wrote, I've also used the phrases, 'you're going to make me come' and 'please don't stop' but, I don't know, it's strange, sometimes when you read it back, it just sounds, wrong!

    :)
     
  18. Lae
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    Lae Contributing Member Contributor

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    No, i think the reader's imagination can do a far better job that i could depicting a scene. They'll also imagine what they like. I might add in certain actions, and some reactions but overall i'd probably leave it as loose as possible.

    haha everything i read back sounds wrong to me so i cant comment on that! maybe its the taboo seeping through.
     
    Last edited: Aug 8, 2014
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  19. T.Trian
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    T.Trian Overly Pompous Bastard Staff Supporter Contributor

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    People say the corniest things while having sex, things that sound God-awful and totally embarassing when taken out of the heat of the moment. And, of course, some people say the weirdest things while fucking, even creepy stuff, so "I'm coming," "don't come yet," "aw, shit, I got come in my hair" aren't really all that weird in the original context, seeing as intense sexual arousal often makes people say funny things. If we only wrote characters who only produced Shakespeare-worthy gems whenever they spoke during sex, it wouldn't be very realistic now would it? :p
     
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  20. Lae
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    Lae Contributing Member Contributor

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    pfft i rattle off a sonnet or two consistently!! :crazy:

    seriously though, "call me daddy" is one common one the creeps me out the most. Still behind closed doors and all that, each to their own.
     
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  21. cutecat22
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    cutecat22 The Strange One Contributor

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    That's very true, but sitting at the lappy having come to the end of a scene where your characters have just had sex on the kitchen table, he's got his breath back and looks at her and says .........

    Sometimes it's hard (pardon the pun) to know what to put. Whatever he says, half your readers will go "awwww" and the other half will burst out laughing. Probably for different reasons though :)

    I've lost count of the number of during sex conversations/noises/movements I've actually edited and edited and deleted and re-wrote just to get the right feel and lets not forget, you can dress it up in any package you want but at the end of the day, sex, is just sex.
     
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  22. T.Trian
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    T.Trian Overly Pompous Bastard Staff Supporter Contributor

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    I don't get the daddy-thing either, it's creepy, but still far from the most disturbing pillow-talk a fella can hear... :unsure:

    @cutecat22, it's impossible to please every reader so why even try? Just do what feels and sounds right to you and some will love it, some will hate it, but to hell with the latter. :p
     
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  23. cutecat22
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    cutecat22 The Strange One Contributor

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    My thoughts exactly! So long as I like what I write - which is why I write because no one has yet written the stories I want to read! :)
     
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  24. tionA
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    tionA Active Member

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    ''daddy'' is a commonly used phrase in the hispanic culture. ay papi.. ay papi asiiiii lol. not creepy at all. it is also used among couples as a term of endearment.
     
    Last edited: Aug 8, 2014
  25. outsider
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    outsider Contributing Member Contributor

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    I would use neither. Ejaculation can be described far more articulately than by using such a crude term.
     

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