Just wondering if for the sake of style can you eliminate the subject or does it add confusion and isn't really stylish but confusing - here's a sample of something I'm working on - He wants to excuse his thoughts... “Didn’t I give you that diamond? Couldn’t I have sold it? Be nice to me.” Spoken with fumbling hot, wet lips. He’s breathing rapidly while chewing the corner of a card. Ace of diamonds. Seen behind the veil, he’s like a snorting beast. Hunched and sweaty and anxious. the Spoken sentence has no subject ( that I notice ) is it clearer to say - he spoke with fumbling hot, wet lips? also - if the action doesn't seem to link up - the speaking and chewing the card - it's because the scene fluctuates between what he imagines, what he'd like to do with what he's actually doing. - the Spoken sentense is imagined, the chewing sentence is real.