Female Author, Male Character

Sorry to everyone if this is starting to get off-topic.

I'd like to share with you a little advice though, my friend. Most of the time when responding to someone over the internet, it's real easy to come across in a less than cordial manner, or even angry in some cases unless stated otherwise or tempered in some way. That's part of the reason why we use smilies is to give a visual cue that everythings all good and you're really just trying to help out or something. It's also best to not be so direct and try to seem more casual, not everything needs to be on point at all times. Its almost just like talking in person, there's little indicators that can be placed to keep from coming off as a jerk or worse. It just takes some practice, and it also helps to read your own message as if you were the one to receive it. Here's an example of how I would have phrased what you wrote :

"Yeah, it's best not to just completely blow off your critic though, I mean, she could have a point. I don't know if she was just old-fashioned and had some issue with a certain type of behavior or whatever, but if one person felt that way, chances are there could be others. You might consider taking a look at the character and seeing if theres some things that could be changed a bit to fit a wider audience.

Is this particular character like the female version of Han Solo kinda'? If that's the case then you're probably shooting for arrogant, but if not then it could be coming across that way and you don't realize it. If she is a "Han Solo" then I'm sure you have some females that are more like the women in Firefly, and then you probably have others that aren't quite that strong, right? It's best to mix things up a bit and not just have everyone be equal, superior or weak all the time."

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Kinda' get where I'm going here? See, that sounds more like you're genuinely trying to help and not just pointing out errors for the sake of it. I think I'll respond to what I wrote actually, at the risk of having a conversation with myself. XD

The woman who critiqued my work is very old-fashioned, she didn't approve of some of the behavior. Instead of thinking in a "gender equality" way and treating her like a man, all she saw was a woman that was acting inappropriately. Not that said behavior is appropriate for men either, but generally accepted as okay since men are just like that sometimes. It's shocking to have a woman behaving like that, and the first conclusion this critic jumped too was that this character was overly promiscuous and seemed "desperate". When in fact said character is promiscuous to an extent just like a man would be, but it's "okay" for a man to be like that in society's eyes and not okay for a woman, which is what I'm trying to pull off with this character, a woman who is considered "okay" to behave like that and not be a sl*t.

Yep, she's definitely a female "Han Solo". I've also mixed up both genders with weak male and female characters, average male and female characters, and a few that are just overboard trying to be better than everyone else. So overall it equals out in a different way so as not to be incredibly boring and have everyone just be on the same level. There's diversity in the characters just like real life, not some even style across the board. I probably should have gone in-depth with my post and explained that a little more, but I was too tired last night when I wrote it.

 

I've actually been doing the same thing (having a male character in a fantasy novel im writing) i think you just have to go with your gut on it. Ask yourself questions like: would he act this way in this situation? Personally, i think its just a matter if you know your character or not. The better you know your character, the easier it gets. really i never thought about it and (yes im a girl) until i saw this thread i just typed up what i thought he would do in the situations i put him in. *laughs as i remember coming up with him* off topic but DONT go with long names; i can deal with them peice of cake but i knew i had to stop when i had to change Badrobonhoed to Batos.

 

I have the same problem. Not only am I writing about a male character, but he is also almost 30 yrs younger than I am. what I am trying to do is people watch and study males of that age group so to speak. I also like the idea of getting input from their perspective.

 

I have inadvertantly discovered alot about my character because of the posts on this thread. I think my main worry in the beginning was that {Male Character} spoke a bit too "on the nose" about things. However, it has sort of become his personality (How can I love and hate the moment a character comes to life so equally?). {Male Character} is not a subtext kind of guy. If something is too painful or scary to say, he just doesn't say it. If it's not, then he just says what he's thinking.

I love this site (and its users). Living in a extremely rural area doesn't allow me to network with other writers, so this site has already made me feel like a better writer. I feel kind of like a spazz when I say it, but I just really love being here.

 

-Best thing to do is to stray away from gender stereotypes.There are masculine girls ,feminine guys and the everything in between.I always thought it worked best to give them there own personality first.

 

(Sorry about quoting the whole thing). It really matters about what your character will do. If the guy is shy and everything then make him shy, if he's rough and tough then make him rough and tough. Don't suddenly jump from a shy guy into a badass at these parts (surprising, but I've seen a shy guy who's always blushing and nervous most of the time become a suave master the moment relationships are brought up and it's not being done for effect. To be honest it doesn't even make sense). The character is what's important in these parts and whatever you think he'd do, he should do (your story after all).

Hopes this helps (it probably won't)

-Lightning

 

Get a feel for your character. Know what they like, don't like etc. Know them like you know yourself. Write the book, then get both a man and woman to read it. Just so you can see what s/he liked and didn't like. Its all trail and error, if your male characters very feminine then you can allow your femininity to rub off onto him, if he isn't resist. The only thing I will say is, Men fall in love easier and women take time. Or so my own personal experience has shown. I've seen many relationships where the male is infatuated with one woman and she just doesn't care, not to the same extent anyway.

As for the side-track of woman being noticed and what not. I would disagree with only attractive women get noticed. Not the case everyone gets noticed its just how gets you going and who doesn't. I've known horridly jealous men and women who cause such an uproar of their partners get a lot of attention and I've known others not care because of the loyalty. I've seen people get cheated on and they all react differently, only yesterday and this is a true story, one of my sisters friends slammed the door that hard onto his boyfriends hand, it sliced off one of his fingers. Men can be nasty, women can be nasty if anything I tend to think women are worse when it comes to being the revenge seeking missile. Never think that one traits only for one gender. if it can happen in one it can happen in the other.

 

I just wrote my big scene where my two characters became an "official" couple. I drew their dialogue and the scene from a composite of my own real life experiences of such moments and that really helped me to get the dialogue right. I also had scenes earlier in the story that made THE scene easier to write because their prior experiences of each other placed them emotionally on the same page. Try using your actual experiences, even if they weren't all that great or romantic, write them as you wish they would have gone.

 

I think you should write it the way you would without overthinking it, with all the emotional nuances traditionally assigned to women if you feel like it, and then in editing you can always make it sound more "masculine" if you need to. But at least you have all the highly charged emotional detail and in my experience it is that kind of detail, carefully and timely placed, that make romantic characters particularly appealing.