1. poetryliberates
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    poetryliberates Banned

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    first impressions

    Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by poetryliberates, Feb 14, 2007.

    Do you think its fair to judge someone by their appearance? I mean theres people out there who take one look at someone and just think that they immediatly know what theyre all about. but the truth is were all different, were all unique, and judging someone by the way they look, their hair, their clothes and even their lifestyle, i mean how fair is that.
    you cant just think that you know everything about a person by looking at them, looks can be decieving, i think people should try looking past peoples faults...after all, beauty is only skin deep.


    PL
     
  2. ariella
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    ariella Contributing Member

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    I have never heard a truer word PL.
    As they say it is not what is on the outside that matters it is what is on the inside that truely counts.

    Ari :):)
     
  3. Frost
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    Frost Contributing Member

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    Well done, you can post things that is as good as general knowledge. Kudos to you sir.
     
  4. Kincaid
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    Kincaid Senior Member

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    Okay. Something that I’ve learned in life is that there are two ways: the way that things should be…then there is the way that things are.

    So maybe we should live in a world were no one is judged by their sex, race, religion, or social standing…but the reality of it is that we don’t.

    Everyone judges people upon how they look, whether they admit it or not. Shouldn’t be that way, but it is. If you can find the time, check out the book BLINK, by Malcolm Gladwell, in there is some interesting facts about people’s first impressions of one another.

    Like for example: if you’re walking down a street and you see a woman pushing a baby cart with a baby in pink, the first thing you think is that the baby is a girl…because we all associate the color pink with feminism. The baby COULD be a boy, but because it was wearing pink…we are conditioned (even without realizing it) to think about a girl.

    I’m black. And I hate rap. I like rock. That shocks people. Because they think that just because I’m black I should like rap. It’s an automatic assumption (whether you admit it or not) because people associate rap music with black people.
    If I were standing next to a Caucasian male, and someone asked you to point to the one who listened to rock, and you only had one second to reply (without stopping to think), who would you point at?

    That’s how life is. We all make snap decisions of each other, lots of times without even realizing it
     
  5. Frost
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    Frost Contributing Member

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    I blame MTV for the rap thing. But you are very right.
    Apologies for the first post i was feeling cynical.
     
  6. Bluemouth
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    Bluemouth Contributing Member Contributor

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    You'll find 90% of the time if a person looks like a stereotype group of people that they do actually fit into that category. I judge everyone in this way, and rarely am I wrong.
     
  7. Frost
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    Frost Contributing Member

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    Except for the emo people. Because emos love to deny their emo-ness, because secretly, they know its lame too.
     
  8. ariella
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    ariella Contributing Member

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    hahahaha good one Frost...lol...

    Ari :)
     
  9. HeinleinFan
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    HeinleinFan Banned

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    To an extent, yes, we should all be nonjudgemental - but in some situations you just don't have time, so you have to go with a stereotype. After all, stereotypes get started because someone realized that a rule of thumb is "mostly true" about a group.

    For example, if I'm walking along a street at night and a group of blonde, high-heeled girls - oh, heck, just a group of practically any girls - were to start walking behind me, I don't get worried. If a group of tall, tattooed guys with Raiders shirts starts to walk behind me, I think strongly about Brady-Kinen in diethyl-methyl-sulfate and my body tenses up. Maybe those people are just walking home after a football game. But I'd be a fool to assume that I had no reason at all to be scared.

    You see my point. When you meet someone for the first time - a business meeting, a class, a friend of a friend - the just thing to do is to assume the best and be friendly. But if you have to make a snap decision, the stereotype or the rule of thumb might make more sense, even if it's only right 40 % of the time.

    - Spoken as one whose high school was, shall we say, not friendly. It isn't good to be in the lunch line, try to stop someone from cutting into the queue, and have the guy threaten to beat you up. Not me - the guy right in front of me. It was still scary.
     
  10. poetryliberates
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    poetryliberates Banned

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    you all have very excellent points here!

    But lets say for example that your avatar was a picture of you, and some obviously bored little person were to study it intently, and then give you the rundown on what they THINK, that your life is? and if that person was to make their final decision of your life/personality based solely on that picture, would you believe that to be fair?
     
  11. Frost
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    Frost Contributing Member

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    If a whole bunch of white tatooed guys in Raiders shirts etc etc start walking behind you here, you stick out of their way and walk fast, head down. If they're black, you run.

    That sounds very racist, but here, that's how it goes. Which is a pity.
     
  12. poetryliberates
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    poetryliberates Banned

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    thats a sad truth right there, my town is the same.
    you just dont go anywhere on foot at night unless theres a minimum of 10 of you..
     
  13. Bluemouth
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    Bluemouth Contributing Member Contributor

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    Yes. For example, if the picture displayed the person in their garden with a certain appearance that links to typical stereotypes then it's fair to judge their life based on that. It doesn't mean you know everything about them, but you would know enough.

    This thread seems a bit personal if you ask me.
     
  14. poetryliberates
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    poetryliberates Banned

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    personal, no.
    just a thought that was in my mind, because after we arent always correct when we sterotype people. even if we think we are.
     
  15. poetryliberates
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    poetryliberates Banned

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    Also if you were to stereotype a person from a picture, would it not be fair to take into account that maybe they simply were under the weather, maybe theyd had a hard night, or maybe they had a dodgy camera lol. things like these are so commonly overlooked when we stereotype
     
  16. ariella
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    ariella Contributing Member

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    It is no more personal than everyone sharing their fantasy with the rest of the forum if you ask me.

    But it is an interesting subject. I mean I am accused of having an eating disorder just because I am so thin....and I don't have an eating disorder...

    You can't tell what a book is like by looking at the cover or if a pair of jeans will fit and be comfortable by looking at them. So why is it fair of people to judge you for your appearances.....

    Ari :)
     
  17. poetryliberates
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    poetryliberates Banned

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    exactly what i mean ari, and yes the fantasy's thread is deeply personal ahahah
     
  18. ItalianStallion
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    ItalianStallion Senior Member

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    There are things that just don't seem fair......Can it be relinquished? or can it be some thing of less importance?.......No, I think not......Whats done is done......more people seem to judge people by there looks and looks alone....Yes, it's sad, but true.....There are always assumptions inplanted in our heads......That kid wears all black and black make-up he's gothic or emo....When really that is how that kid expresses himself to people....but people decide to judge and push that kid away.......It's not fair and it is out there......But.... the question is will it ever change??
     
  19. ariella
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    ariella Contributing Member

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    Well honestly I do not judge people by their appearance what so ever, never have, never will. I have always judged a person by who they are, their personality. You may be the most gorgeous female or guy in the world, but to me it means nothing if your personality stinks.

    Ariella
     
  20. Bluemouth
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    Bluemouth Contributing Member Contributor

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    I get the same thing.

    That's a fair statement.
     
  21. Vroom Vroom Daddy
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    Vroom Vroom Daddy Member

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    That is the wonder of the web, I really DON'T know anything about you that you don't choose to tell me, and even that I take with a grain of salt. I assumed most of you were older until someone put that age question up. (Kudos, assuming everyone was truthful, there is a very mature and smart crowd of teenagers here)
    But back to appearances, reality and moral right are streets that rarely intersect. I'm sure that if I had all my biker leather on and my friends and I met you in a back alley you ask me directions to the opera.
     
  22. Robert
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    Robert Banned

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    There's nothing wrong with judging people by their appearance, and of course it's fair because by and large people choose their appearance. I don't agree, though, with the idea what we fix our opinion of someone based solely on that first appearance or consider that we know everything about them. Often we refine our opinion of someone as we get to know them better, and may change our opinion of them radically over time. It's all quite natural.

    Cheers,
    Rob
     

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