1. yuny2853
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    yuny2853 New Member

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    Greetings

    Discussion in 'New Member Introductions' started by yuny2853, Jan 23, 2008.

    Hi everyone,
    I'm yuny2853 and I'm an "free-lance writer" here because i need feedback on my first children's story that i'm writing that I hope will be published this year. It actually has educational purpose in it for this young female panda bear needs glasses and goes to the optometrist and optical store and learns that she is near-sighted and has slight astigmatism. I'm aiming for the 7-12 year olds and have had my sister (who is 11) and my cousin (who is 12) read it...
    I'm going to post in the Children's section so hopefully all will come on over and take a look to provide much needed critique/comments/suggestions.

    Thanks and i hope to be hear from you.

    ~yuny
     
  2. Shinn
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    Shinn Banned

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    Hello there yuny and welcome to the forum :)
     
  3. Charisma
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    Charisma Transposon Contributor

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    Cheers, I hope you get good and constructive critique on your work. However, I must add that posting your work will disqualify it for publishing.

    Here's a basic welcome from all of us. It should be obvious, but in case it isn't, let me explain. The Writing Problems Area is exclusively where opinions on different ways to write, blockages in writing styles and similar problems can be discussed. In the Review Room, you can get critical appreciation and/or analysis of your written material. Behold, you must first review two pieces of writing before posting your own. This is ensure the pieces are evaluated to the most. Other than this, we have Writing Cotnests, weekly and monthly, where you can submit your writing. We also have Word games, Book Discussion and so on, classified under Community interaction. It may interest you if you're just hanging around.

    adamant has been kind enough to put many of the things I have mentioned or missed out on in one comprehensive place. If you want to check it out, see the Newbie Packets:
    Noobie Packets! - Writing Forums

    Enjoy it here, and don't feel shy to ask for help. We are all here to teach and learn in a mutual environment. And we hope you can do the same.

    Regards and Best Wishes!
     
  4. Charisma
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    Charisma Transposon Contributor

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    Reposted.
     
  5. mammamaia
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    mammamaia nit-picker-in-chief Contributor

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    welcome, yuni!

    i have to ditto anthrax's good advice re the posting of your story and scotching its chances of being published... if you've already posted the whole thing, delete all but a short excerpt of it ASAP... and if you want the whole thing gone over for feedback, i work with lots of beginning children's writers, so feel free to send it to me by email and i'll let you know if it's ready to be submitted or not, plus show you what needs fixing [if anything does] and how to do so...

    i must say, however, that a lesson' story about a bear who needs glasses sounds way too young for 11-12 yr olds... much better suited to the 4-8 range, imo... such a story would have to be a picture book, i should think and the older kids are reading chapter books... the fact that 2 family member older kids said they liked it is not a good test of the actual market... and of course, they love you, so are not exactly unbiased test readers...

    if you haven't done the requisite research into what's out there and selling well along your story's lines, i strongly urge you to do so... do an amazon search for that age range to see what comes up [and what doesn't]... i t think you'll find little or nothing like yours in that division... then check the books selling for 4-8 and you'll be more likely to find books like yours... fyi, the ranges on amazon are 4-8 and 9-12... that is not exactly as all publishers divvy up the ages, but i suspect it's close to how most do...

    hope this is helpful...
    love and hugs, maia
    maia3maia@hotmail.com
     
  6. Neha
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    Neha Beyond Infinity. Contributor

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    Hey Yuni...!!! Hope you have a great time here!!

    ~Neha~
     
  7. Cogito
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    Cogito Former Mod, Retired Supporter Contributor

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    Hello Yuny, Welcome to the Writing Forums.

    If you haven't explored the site yet, you should probably do so soon. Newcomers often gravitate to the Lounge, the Word Games, or the Review Room, but there is much more to be discovered if you poke in the corners. Remember to check out our FAQ as well!

    As for the Review Room, new joiners often wonder why we do things a bit differently on this site than on other writing sites. We emphasize reviewing as a critical writing skill. Training your eye by reviewing other people's work helps you improve your own writing even before you present it for others to see. Therefore, we ask members to review other people's writing before posting work of their own. The Review Room forums on this site, therefore, are true workshops, not just a bulletin board for displaying your work (and on that note, please only post each item for review in one Review Room forum). See this post, Why Write Reviews Before Posting My Work? for more information.

    Enjoy your stay here, and have fun!
     
  8. Torana
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    Torana Contributing Member Contributor

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    Welcome to WF.org I hope that you have a most wonderful and pleasant time here with all of us.
    Torana
     

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