1. PhillySS
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    PhillySS Member

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    Help! essay advice neede!

    Discussion in 'General Writing' started by PhillySS, Feb 17, 2012.

    I am writing a paper for a first year university literature class, i need help re-writing a sentence. "In the short period of knowing each other, their friendship has grown so much that Gilgamesh trusts Enkidu enough to let him manage his decisions." With the way it is written, it sounds so repetitive. and when writing 2/3 should i leave it as is or write it in words?
     
  2. Rapscallion
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    Rapscallion Active Member

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    Unless you are writing a math text book write 2/3 in words (two thirds), unless of course you are writing something explicitly mathematical (like a math text book).

    Your sentence also seems to have a dual meaning.
    Gilgamesh trusts Enkidu enough to let him manage Enkidu's (Enkidu's own) decisions, or Gilgamesh trusts Enkidu enough to let him manage Gilgamesh's decisions?

    I would change the sentence to this:

    "Despite there young friendship, it has grown so that Gilgamesh now trusts Enkidu to manage decisions on his behalf."

    Hope that's the kinda thing you were looking for.
     
  3. mammamaia
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    mammamaia nit-picker-in-chief Contributor

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    that's a bit better, rap, but 'there' should be 'their'... and 'strong' or 'close' is needed after 'so' to make that sentence make sense... better still/more clear might be:

    "Despite the short duration of their friendship, it has grown so strong that Gilgamesh now trusts Enkidu to make decisions for him."
     
  4. PhillySS
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    PhillySS Member

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    thanks a lot for the help guys :] the paragraph sounds a lot smoother
     

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