There are two great phrases that i like when it comes to writing: 1. Write what you know - Unless you've had personal experience of something on some level you will generally struggle to write about it authentically. A writer who writes about being caught in a war will always play second fiddle to someone who has lived it. 2. "I cut my wrists and bleed onto the page" - The most powerful writing is writing that exposes you in some way. Now this doesn't mean writing like a blog where every single mundane item in your life is catalogued like a twitter feed. It means writing with a degree of "honesty" about the real issues and concerns that motivate you (fictional or otherwise). If you're writing to aggrandise yourself then chances are you will merely come across as pompous and the situtations you place the idealised form of you in will seem artificial, or comic.
Ever listen to an organ recital? No, I don't mean the kind performed by a musician. I mean when people witter on about their aches and pains, their surgeries, and an encyclopedic listing of their health concerns. Generally, it's because they have naught better to talk about, but the deepest pain of all is having to sit there and listen to it. It's obsessive and narcissistic, and so is writing that is all about the author. No one other than teh author really wants to hear it all. But that's different from injecting the authors experiences into his or her writing, so the reader is exposed to an authentic glimpse into true feelings and the complexities of interaction that extend beyond the predictable. The writer also views other people through the lens of his or her experiences, and the writer cannot shy away from any personal pain or embarassment that may evoke.
I've been through and seen alot in life and it'd be a shame to have suffered through all this without putting it to good use. I draw the line only at the point where my own dignity is at stake, or by not making a person I know in real life, be too recognizeable (this boils down to real name + proffession + location as fictionalized/name-changed real people are still recognizeable to those who know them). My first finished novel draws from the worst time of my life and everybody who knows me, knows who the characters are. So what: I was told alot of times that it was good (not by friends or family but by people who don't care about giving me a warm fuzzy feeling). And if the people the characters are based on, fear for their reputation: Well, that only means that they endangered their reputation themselves and can't blame me just for telling the truth since nobody can expect me to make a secret out of others being a-holes to me, out of consideration for those same a-holes. A metaphorical punch in the groin would be what they had coming, so no, I don't spare them, I merely have the decency to change their names and those of their college, suburb etc. Also, the chances of Belgians reading a German novel, are slim. As for sharing my private life with the reader through slightly modified/fictionalized events in my life, I'm not very shy usually. As I said, my dignity is where I draw the line, but where exactly that line is, can be surprising to others. For example, I'd be more ashamed of the event of ****ting my pants beyond age 3, than I'd be about being raped (both hypothetical).
