Perhaps it's just my low self esteem, but I doubt my writing every single day. I cringe, thinking of some of the things I've done to move the plot along. I feel like my writing is shallow, boring, and poorly constructed, but I keep writing, chasing the story as I see it in my mind's eye. Too often, I feel like I'm just not good enough to tell it. I know a lot of writers - and artists of all varieties - sometimes struggle with nagging self doubt. How do you believe in your writing? What keeps you going?
By treating it as something that needs to be worked. I've never been under the delusion that I needed a gift in order to write. I treat it the way I treat my relationship with hubby. There too I am under no delusions that Prince Charming is in any way real, that relationships that are "meant to be" just happen magically. They don't. That's a lie. They have to be worked, and tended, and cared for, and cultivated. No different with writing.
Just write what you like to write. When you're dying inside from the lack of an outside opinion you'll know it's time to show it to someone else.
From the very first short story, I've had people who saw potential in what I was writing and asked me to write more. I don't think I'd have made it nearly so far without support. A good critique group can do wonders (provided it's not a sharks and dinner group.)
No matter how much people like my writing or drawing, I will always have doubts. There is always somebody out there who is way better than I, and that is the way it is always going to be. I guess it is time to throw off the normal and dive where few dare to go, even if it is risky insanity can break the mold if you can pull it off. In short I know I suck, but at least I have the nerve to say it. Not that it is going to stop me from doing it.
I believe my writing is good, or at least will eventually be good. Knowing that going in kinda knocks a lot of the doubt on the head. I trust myself to get to something good. It doesn't need to be perfect right this second, it just needs to get done. Write the story. The good will come. If it doesn't write some more. Every word is malleable, everything is on the chopping block for being potentially shit and that's how I roll. In short, I don't need to believe in my writing. I'm going to change everything anyway. I just need to get it down and it'll become something awesome.
I can see progress. And the only way to see progress is to keep writing, rewriting, polishing. Critiquing and being critiqued. There is no easy solution to having confidence in yourself or your art. Some days are better than others. I've read of Pulitzer prize winners wanting to torch their manuscripts. That alone lets me know - doubt touches everyone. There's no prize, feedback, outcome that's really going to make it completely go away. What keeps me going? I like my stories, I want to find out how they end.
Thank you for the link. That was a delightful read. Sharks & Dinner.... Also, I have to state for the record that Rule #6 has given me pause. We don't often get a member in the Workshop who is the Writer from Hell mentioned in the article, but they have happened. Going to have to give thought to implementing a Failsafe Procedure for Member Gone Mad.
If I believe in my writing? -> What is there to believe in? Of course not! It's fiction. What keeps me going? -> Well, I don't have a choice. (The Muse gets really pissed at me when I ignore her). I'll try to be serious now. Ahem... The only time I got frustrated about my ability in writing was when I had serious money issues and in my desperation ended up with the conclusion that in order to pull it off I would either have to rob a bank or become famous somehow. Now, do not rush to comment upon it. I already know that it's an idiotic approach but yeah... money. Can live with them, can't live without them. So I thought: "I know! I'll become a famous writer! I got very good feedback for my works from a blog I've been posting, so why not take this seriously? I'll make a master piece! If J.K Rolling made it then so can I. I only have to follow the rules and the trends." Right my megalomaniac self, - pet, pet - whatever you say. We'll get through this together... Anyways, what I mean to say is that worrying leads to more worrying. When you set the bar too high, putting a gun into your mouth in order to make up something greater than great, you usually end up with self doubt and doodling up shit. The "Rules" distort your already indecisive thinking and turn into a heavy cross that you have to carry on top of your personal Golgotha, while the Muse crucifies you and leaves you to rot. Why? Because your mind is not where it should be. It's preoccupied with survival issues (for you, it might be something different) which lead to self worth issues that lead to a bottomless pit of pure, mindless paranoia. When you write, you should be calm and a hundred per cent focused on what you are seeing in your minds screen. Everything else is left outside. No goals, no rules, no worries. Leave these for later. (I assure you that they will be loyally waiting for you on the other side). Enjoy the ride! ...Leave the editing for later. I still haven't finished anything yet. I'm simultaneously writing three different stories in three different genres. I'm also into other creative things that are tedious and take a lot of my time and effort apart from writing and I'm not willing to sacrifice anyone of them. Tried it once and it only made me miserable. Nothing was gained. I'm not published yet but by the looks of it, I'll be one day (except if I get involved in some kind of freak accident). So: (Caution! Pessimist advisory. Motivational content. Unconventional thinking). 1) Never try to contain yourself. Let the Muse show you. She knows better than anyone. As time goes by, she'll start speaking to you and your writing will become much better. 2) How will you find the golden section if you don't go through the extremes? Loathing your work is only one side of the extremes. (Got a bunch of negative critique and you feel like shit? Well done)! Let's move on to the other side now. (Try to find pilgrims. They'll make you feel like god). Somewhere in between lies the Truth. 3) Do not rush or whip yourself to produce. Why demean yourself to a donkey when what you really are is an artist? (This should be common knowledge. Duh)! You don't produce. You create. 4) 1,2 & 3 may not be suitable for you. We all got different finger prints anyways. (Even mirror twins do). Do not follow any advise that doesn't suit your personality. Maybe you are a masochist and like whipping or a kitten that likes petting or a nihilist that simply doesn't give a fuck. Why not? You are going to do what your mind is set to doing anyways. Have fun!
If you need motivation to keep writing, stop. Just stop. Go and do something else you want to do. For the OP: I hear ya. I still think my writing is shit and always miss the mark of where I'd like to be. But other people seem to like it. That'll do for now. I keep writing anyway. I have to. But it's not as good as I'd like. Maybe that's why. The endless desire to create something worthwhile.
I'm not going to argue if you are good or bad at writing. I trust that you are very self-aware like most creative types. Most people who start off writing are bad, because writing is a skill, a craft, that takes time to develop. My coach once told me there are several stages of skill, the first group the group that is people who are bad at things. 1. People who are bad and don't know it 2. People who are bad and do know it 3. People who are bad, know it, and know what to do to get better. If you are bad, like you sometimes feel like you are, you are still in group three and that is a good thing. In your first post you already pointed out that you see the mistakes you are making. You realize that you not reached your full potential and at times that may make you feel down. At the end of the day, that ability to look at yourself critically is what is going to make you great. It will enable you to grow in your skill. You are already in a position to become much better and deep down you are already identifying what you need to do to be better. If you are finding mistakes, you are getting better. I am getting better, and that is why i keep writing.
I like to hold on to certain attitude with everything; life, hobbies, friends and writing. "More you work for it, more it gives."
my answer would depend on what stage in writing you are in. First do you have a clear path for your story? If you do then you need to write it, simple. Just write your first draft and dont look back. You will have the opportunity to make it better with subsequent drafts. That is how I believe in my work, working on it until it becomes what i want.