1. SeaBreeze
    Offline

    SeaBreeze Banned

    Joined:
    Dec 15, 2006
    Messages:
    1,195
    Likes Received:
    17
    Location:
    At the bar

    I had no idea where to put this but his seemed close enough.. does it sound enticing?

    Discussion in 'General Writing' started by SeaBreeze, Sep 27, 2007.

    I wrote what would be put on the book I'm reading, or along that lines, more like a blurby thing that appeals to potential readers, can you let me know if this is at all appealing? Would you be interested in reading further or does it just plain... suck? (be nice! :p) If you don't like it, what would you suggest?? And if this is in the wrong section, let me know and just move it to the appropriate thread!

    ~~~~~

    “The police spokesperson revealed that this is the seventh murder in as many da...”

    Murder isn't such an un-commen thing in Hope City, but when people start dropping like flies then turning up with unusal markings on their bodies, Zeke Harris, resident vampire slayer of Hope City, begins looking into the crimes and finds that this is bigger than anything he has faced so far in his life.

    Then he recieves help from an unlikely source. A halfbreed vampire. His job is to slay vampires, but can he trust one with his life?

    “I used to be like you. A Guardian, a slayer.”
    “And now you're a vampire, congratulations.”
    “Don't you realise that if this thing gets out, everything will be wiped out? You need me as much as I need you. ”


    Street Malcovich. Four Hundred plus years old, working for an organisation that she hates, is about to find that life is about to start to get interesting

    Because for the past six hundred years, every six years, sixty-six people are sacrificed to the darkness. Now in the six hundredth year, it shall rise and we will all be fed to the darkness.



    Thanks for looking and let me know please! Regardless if you think this is crap or not. I need feedback as if you had picked up my book and Read the BluRb inside. So just let me know and I will either work on it or think of something else! Cheers!
     
  2. mammamaia
    Offline

    mammamaia nit-picker-in-chief Contributor

    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2006
    Messages:
    19,316
    Likes Received:
    1,014
    Location:
    Coquille, Oregon
    why are you even writing a blurb [spelled with an 'r']?... are you going to self-publish your novel?... if not, you don't write the back cover or jacket copy, the publisher does...
     
  3. SeaBreeze
    Offline

    SeaBreeze Banned

    Joined:
    Dec 15, 2006
    Messages:
    1,195
    Likes Received:
    17
    Location:
    At the bar
    Well, I wanted to know if it was good, even if I published the novel myself or whatever, I just thought I did an okay job on it. I wanted to know if, from a readers perspective if it sounded good and if it would intrest anyone in reading my novel, which would be fantasy. So not quite the reply I was looking for Maia but thankyou for your contribution.

    ~Doz.
     
  4. newguy
    Offline

    newguy Contributing Member

    Joined:
    Nov 12, 2006
    Messages:
    411
    Likes Received:
    2
    Location:
    everywhere but home
    Dropbear...
    Might I suggest that you go back and revise
    I've spotted a few typing errors...

    And unto your request...
    I found that the 'Blurb'
    lacked a bit more substance and detail
    but it did sound like an interesting read for me
    you just have to view it in such a way that you consider
    whether or not casual readers might take an interest in the novel itself
    after they read this...

    that's my opinion
     
  5. SeaBreeze
    Offline

    SeaBreeze Banned

    Joined:
    Dec 15, 2006
    Messages:
    1,195
    Likes Received:
    17
    Location:
    At the bar
    Thankyou kindly for your comments. Extremely helpful. As for spelling, My spell check on my computer refuses to spell anything correct, (I don't have microsoft word unfortunatly) and it was transfered directly from screen I had typed it from.
    But I want to thankyou for taking the time to read it and give feed back. It is exactly what I was looking for.

    ~Doz
     

Share This Page