1. One90proof
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    One90proof New Member

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    I heard there was free beer in here. Am I too late?

    Discussion in 'New Member Introductions' started by One90proof, Jul 22, 2011.

    I'm not a writer. I wish I could say I am but that would be a lie. You see, I suffer from the unfortunate combined effects of laziness and procrastination. That's a deadly combination but I'm working hard to overcome it. Well, except for when I'm daydreaming. That does take up a lot of my time.

    An amazing thing happened one day last week. During one of my brief "I wanna be a writer!!!" phases that seem to hit me every so often I did something that I haven't done before. I wrote. Yep, I touched fingers to keyboard and banged out 1500 words...of crap. It was awful. Really, it was terrible. I'd take a bullet in the leg before I would let anyone read it. But, and this is the important part, that simple exercise stirred something in me. Some sort of sneaky writing gremlin in my brain that's been sleeping since childhood, biding its time, suddenly woke from its slumber and demanded more!

    I'm proud to say that I've written something every day since. Is any of it any good? Eh, I think a couple of things I'm working on are pretty clever but most of it is still crap. That's not important right now though. What is important, at least to me, is how I feel when I'm writing. It sounds corny and makes me want to puke a little to write this but I feel more alive when I'm writing, especially when I'm in 'the zone' and the words are flying from brain to screen without effort. It feels like the air is electric, my senses are heightned and I'm traveling through space at light speed. Ok, deep breath, finding my calm, putting the crack pipe down. ;)

    Ok, so that's my little introduction. My goal is to continue writing every day, become more knowledgeable in the art of writing, and perhaps learn a little bit about myself along the way. I've been reading a lot of fantasy lately but I also enjoy horror, various non-fiction stuff, science fiction, humor, and whatever else looks interesting at the time. As with most of my interests, my taste in books varies widely. What do I like to write? I don't really know yet. I'm dabbling a bit with some humorous (at least to me) pieces and I want to try something in the horror genre. It all depends on my mood I suppose. Anything is fair game.

    I'll see you all around the forums. :)
     
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  2. Mallory
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    Mallory Mallegory. Contributor

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    *Cracks open a beer can, hands it over*

    Here you go dude. Get writing. ;)
     
  3. Taylee91
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    Taylee91 Carpe Diem Contributor

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    Welcome, one90 to WF. Have fun!
     
  4. One90proof
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    One90proof New Member

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    Cogito, in an effort to lighten your workload ever so slightly I've taken the liberty of pasting your newbie welcome post below. :D


    Hello One90proof, Welcome to the Creative Writing Forums.

    Before you can get critique, you must first give constructive critique. This is not just a quid pro quo, it is because improving your critiquing skills is the primary focus of the Writing Workshop. Improving your critiquing skills will improve your ability to find and fix weaknesses in your own writing.

    Please read How to Use the Writing Workshop before you try to post there. Posting your own writing for people to comment on should not be among the very first things you do here anyway. It is worth taking the time to see what other people have done to improve their writing, and see if some of it applies to your writing as well. That is part of why we require members to review other members' work before posting their own for review. On the other hand, there are no restrictions, other than content and copyright rules, on showcasing your work in your member blog.

    Also, be aware that posting a piece of writing on any public site, including this one, will greatly diminish your chances of selling it for publication. Removing the writing later does not alter that fact - once posted, it is irreversibly considered published. So do not post anything more than a small excerpt of any piece you are planning to submit for publication.

    If you haven't explored the site yet, you should probably do so soon. Newcomers often gravitate to the Lounge, the Word Games, or the Writing Workshop, but there is much more to be discovered if you poke in the corners. Remember to check out our FAQ as well, and be sure to read through the forum rules, too, to avoid any misunderstandings or hurt feelings. Respect for one another is our principal mandate.

    As for the Writing Workshop, new joiners often wonder why we do things a bit differently on this site than on other writing sites. We emphasize constructive critique as a vital writing skill. Training your eye by reviewing other people's work helps you improve your own writing even before you present it for others to see. Therefore, we ask members to review other people's writing before posting work of their own. We also impose a two-week waiting period before you may post writing for critique, to give you time to become familiar with what is expected and how the site operates. The Writing Workshop forums on this site, therefore, are true workshops, not just a bulletin board for displaying your work (and on that note, please only post each item for review in one Writing Workshop forum). Also, please use the same thread for all revisions and additional excerpts from the same piece of writing. See this post, Why Write Reviews Before Posting My Work? for more information.

    And while you're looking around, don't forget to check out the RPG forum for improvisational fiction. Also try our Weekly Short Story Contest and Weekly Poetry Contest. They actually run more than one week apiece, but any member may enter, and all members are urged to vote for their favorites.

    Enjoy your stay here, and have fun!
     
  5. Taylee91
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    Taylee91 Carpe Diem Contributor

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    ^haha, very funny!
     
  6. Jayyy1014
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    Jayyy1014 Jerrica Contributor

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    Welcome to the Writing Forums! :) I hope you enjoy your stay! :D
     
  7. LaGs
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    LaGs Banned

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    Haha, this fine introduction made me laugh

    I think you and I will get along just fine

    Welcome :)
     
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  8. Eunoia
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    Eunoia Contributing Member Contributor

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    Welcome. :)
    That was an amusing introduction. :p
     
  9. Trish
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    Trish I've been deleted.. again Contributor

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    LOL :D Welcome to WF, one90proof!
     
  10. One90proof
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    One90proof New Member

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    Thank you all for your kindness. All jokes aside, I do hope to contribute positively to these forums.

    I just read Cogito's Constructive Critiques. This is a skill I hope to improve. I sometimes struggle understanding why I like or dislike a book or story. It frustrates me when the best I can come up with is "it's really good" or "um, that sucks". I want to know why I think a particular piece works well, or doesn't, and what the writer can improve to tell a better story.

    I'm excited right now as I always am when I start something new. I'm going to spend the next few days getting to know these forums a little better, perhaps try my hand at a critique, and of course write, write, write. But first, I'm going to drink this beer that Mallory so kindly cracked open for me before it goes flat. :)
     
  11. Gigi_GNR
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    Gigi_GNR Guys, come on. WAFFLE-O. Contributor

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    Welcome.
     
  12. Cogito
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    Cogito Former Mod, Retired Supporter Contributor

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    Hello High Proof, Welcome to the Creative Writing Forums.

    The good news is, there is some beer left. The bad news is that it is warm Schlitz.

    Please read How to Use the Writing Workshop before you try to post there. Posting your own writing for people to comment on should not be among the very first things you do here anyway. It is worth taking the time to see what other people have done to improve their writing, and see if some of it applies to your writing as well. That is part of why we require members to review other members' work before posting their own for review. On the other hand, there are no restrictions, other than content and copyright rules, on showcasing your work in your member blog.

    Also, be aware that posting a piece of writing on any public site, including this one, will greatly diminish your chances of selling it for publication. Removing the writing later does not alter that fact - once posted, it is irreversibly considered published. So do not post anything more than a small excerpt of any piece you are planning to submit for publication.

    If you haven't explored the site yet, you should probably do so soon. Newcomers often gravitate to the Lounge, the Word Games, or the Writing Workshop, but there is much more to be discovered if you poke in the corners. Remember to check out our FAQ as well, and be sure to read through the forum rules, too, to avoid any misunderstandings or hurt feelings. Respect for one another is our principal mandate.

    As for the Writing Workshop, new joiners often wonder why we do things a bit differently on this site than on other writing sites. We emphasize constructive critique as a vital writing skill. Training your eye by reviewing other people's work helps you improve your own writing even before you present it for others to see. Therefore, we ask members to review other people's writing before posting work of their own. We also impose a two-week waiting period before you may post writing for critique, to give you time to become familiar with what is expected and how the site operates. The Writing Workshop forums on this site, therefore, are true workshops, not just a bulletin board for displaying your work (and on that note, please only post each item for review in one Writing Workshop forum). Also, please use the same thread for all revisions and additional excerpts from the same piece of writing. See this post, Why Write Reviews Before Posting My Work? for more information.

    And while you're looking around, don't forget to check out the RPG forum for improvisational fiction. Also try our Weekly Short Story Contest and Weekly Poetry Contest. They actually run more than one week apiece, but any member may enter, and all members are urged to vote for their favorites.

    Enjoy your stay here, and have fun!
     
  13. the1
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    the1 Active Member

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    Cogito, your job has already been done! :D
     
  14. Marranda
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    Marranda Senior Member

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    Eww, Cogito, warm Schlitz? Gah! I'd settle for a hot Hieneken before touching a warm Schlitz (which I've done before, but it was a hot Hieneken over a hot MGD).

    Sorry, I'm a beer snob. I had to say something...
     
  15. Cogito
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    Cogito Former Mod, Retired Supporter Contributor

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    I always say, "Before you're out of Schlitz, you're out of beer."

    Schlitz, the beer that made Milwaukee famous bleed rectally.
     
  16. MiscEtc
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    MiscEtc Member

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    My, my, that was a fantastically amusing and well written introduction you have there. You told us quite a bit about you and entertained at the same time. Not a writer you say! Ha! You definitly have a knack for it. Just don't let that nasty procrastination/laziness bug take ahold of you any more. Kick it's butt and keep learnin' and writin'! I think you'll do great- you're definitly in the right place.
     
  17. One90proof
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    One90proof New Member

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    Great quote! The last Schlitz I drank chugged as quickly as possible to avoid the taste was about 15 years ago when I was too young to know any better. But hey, free beer is free beer so I wouldn't complain. :D
     
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  18. One90proof
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    One90proof New Member

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    Thank you but I'm starting to feel guilty so I should just come clean now. I didn't write that introduction. Sadly, I'm just an extremely wealthy dot.com millionaire that's beta testing the next Big Thing.

    We've just launched a new startup that will offer affordable, professional ghost writing services to the masses. With our devoted team of expert writers working behind the scenes on your behalf you'll be the envy of everyone you interact with online. Why waste time posting mediocre content to forums, Facebook, blogs and Twitter? Let our experienced team of ghost writers do it for you with elegant style and dramatic effect.

    Each of our professional ghost writers has earned at least a master’s degree at one of world’s most prestigious universities. We are very excited about this new venture and expect explosive growth once we go live early next month. Stay tuned for more updates.

    Here’s a photo of our team.


    [​IMG]
     

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