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  1. Eurlo
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    Eurlo Banned

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    I need help my character is at a screeching halt-_-

    Discussion in 'Character Development' started by Eurlo, Jan 26, 2011.

    Ok my characters are fantasy, wolfs to be exact, I can't tell you to much or I might risk my book being publish later soo here I go....

    One wolfs name is Shebra(sheah•bra) she's a female with grey coat of fur and a hint of glossiness
    She has ice blue eyes

    The other is Eurlo(your•low) he's a male and has a very odd orangey/brown coat color he's simi muscle, has dark green eyes

    They also like each other...

    My question/problem is:

    I'm not good at character development and need extra description to these two characters I need a bases of their life,family,friends,demeanor(did I spell that right?)


    So all help is encouraged
     
  2. Elgaisma
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    Elgaisma Contributing Member Contributor

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    See you have told us what they look like here not what they are like - one suggestion would be to take them out of the story and write a first person present tense few paragraphs about them doing something can be anything from sniffing each others behinds to shopping.

    Remember they have five senses as you write it. There is also a thread on here what would my MC do under games its worth working your way through some of the questions on there.
     
  3. Eurlo
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    Eurlo Banned

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    Huh I'm confused :(?
     
  4. Eurlo
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    Eurlo Banned

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    Ok here's a few details I'll release:

    Shebra:was a lone wolf,found a pack,was hated in new pack,eurlo met her,they became great friends,there's evil being plotted (I'm working on that part)
     
  5. Elgaisma
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    Elgaisma Contributing Member Contributor

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    Well I know what your characters look like but I don't know if they are shy, outgoing, if they prefer pepsi or cola, do they have any mannerisms, do they have hobbies (maybe a favourite tree to pee against etc)

    One way to understand them as characters better is to write about them. One of my character's called Nate is a spy and proved hard to pin down concerning looks and personality. So I took him out of the enviroment of the main story and took him fishing with his boyfriend. If you write first person, present tense you will get into the head of your character. It doesn't have to be good.

    http://www.writingforums.org/showthread.php?t=36790

    Here is the thread I was talking about.

    Something I have also done is written about my characters as children.

    I also keep a blog (in process of changing it to my website so it hasn't been updated for awhile) - where one of my character's talks to me tells me about his life. (the link is in my signature)
     
  6. Eurlo
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    Eurlo Banned

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    I write as the characters, um

    Shebra:she's calm,has a tender voice,is kinda tomboy,likes getting dirty(mud),thinks everyone hates her,is in love

    Eurlo:he's complex as far as his personality he's nice/evil/immortal,he's tricky,lovable,dangerous,not to be questioned.... That's about all I can tell really :(

    Hobbies:

    Shebra: likes the lake at a full moon,likes fitting in, she is fast/agile , likes to ??? Havnt thought bout her hobbies8(

    Eurlo:likes to kill,loves to trick females, is not good with his temper, likes to take souls of those he loves:)
     
  7. Elgaisma
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    Elgaisma Contributing Member Contributor

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    How far into your story are you ? I need to write a lot before i know my characters to the point I am happy with them.
     
  8. Eurlo
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    Eurlo Banned

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    I dk I didn't plan chapters I just wrote iv figuered the name of one chapter:D

    I think I've wrote like 9+ pages:)
     
  9. Eurlo
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    Eurlo Banned

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    That's alot for a person who's never wrote a book8(
    I'm quite proud of my self:)
     
  10. Elgaisma
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    Elgaisma Contributing Member Contributor

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    lol just keep writing, it is a lot but you have a bit further to go - it usually takes me a full first draft and then some to get the proper feel of a character, even the ones I am right inside of the head of.

    Just talk to them, and tell their story. They will tell you who they are better than any of us can. They may even change beyond recoginition. Nathaniel Smith (Nate) my part sparrow/part immortal spy who is partner to the once Crown Prince,, tall wears brightly coloured eye patches and hats. Started out life as Paul Jackson, Palace Facilities Manager - a funny little dark haired man in a pin stripe suit. His job to organise a funeral. He didn't like that at all lol
     
  11. Eurlo
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    Eurlo Banned

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    Talk to them8(? btw I messages you:)
     
  12. Pen
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    Can you imagine your characters talking to each other, or indeed to other characters? What would be my first impression on meeting this character and talking to them?

    Elgaisma's right in that characters will change as you write them, and they become more characterised, so to speak, by the effect of the plot on them and the effect they can then have on the plot. Say you have a scene where some pack insiders are plotting this nameless evil, and Eurlo has overheard them. Later, he meets Shebra at the lakeside, perhaps by chance- what does he tell her about what he's heard?

    As far as I know, the threat to publishing occurs when you post large excerpts (more than a page or two) of the finished article here- giving a brief plot overview shouldn't cause trouble, especially as stories change an awful lot between a first draft and a finished piece.
     
  13. Eurlo
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    Eurlo Banned

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    Unedited edition...IGNORE FEMALES NAME THAT WAS TEMPERARLY IN PLACE TO GET STARTED!!

    This is not specified part of book because I havnt divided it into chapters,epilogou(spelled right?)ect...

    I'm here looking for sancuary under the land of Elana.
    Iv been traveling for a year till I stumbled apon your land ....
    My name is White Fang and I'm a female, I'm grey with a shiny gloss on my coat.
    **As I grew without my mother,my father taught me how to hunt for my first time and I failed miserably, as I crept up on the very wise bird I step on a twig and scare it off. As the months went by I grew older and with age came knowledge, I'm now able to hunt for myself I'm 4 years old and my father has decided he has to leave.Out of curiosity I ask him why, pausing for only a minute he gazes towards the sky and say he's needed elsewhere...shocked by his answer I stare at him unknowing of my future and what lies ahead. He looks at me with much heart felt love he tells me good-bye...as I watch him disappear into the distance he stop to look at me for the last time ...he turns and leaves.
     
  14. Pen
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    Pen Member

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    Is this written in a letter? A character describing themselves physically to somebody in whose presence they are is pretty unusual. Also, tense wise, use "I travelled" rather than "I have been travelling" before "until". I mention this because getting across physical descriptions can often be a tricky thing to get right. You could go from the point of view of the gatekeeper e.g.

    "A bark at the gate- at this hour? Perhaps a straggler from the night's hunt, but unless the heavy rain had muffled the call this was a stranger. I hurried to the slit window, from which I saw an unfamiliar female, mottled grey with a coat wet enough to reflect the gatehouse lights in hundreds of little points..."

    Sounds like the sort of thing the newcomer would say to the gatekeeper as he either kept her out there, gruffly barking questions through the porthole or invited her in and questioned her in more comfortable surroundings, depending on the tribe's policy on such matters. That initial interview would give plenty of opportunity for exposition, along with the strange situation giving your characters a lot of time to establish themselves and the setting.

    Is the gatekeeper hostile initially? If so, why does he change his mind? WHo else does he call to help him make the decision, if anybody? How do they take the news of a single stray female asking for shelter?

    Also, do watch those tenses in there, and "My father left for no apparent reason" might not be the best explanation, but don't feel she should explain the whole thing then and there. There may be secrets she wants to keep.
     
  15. Eurlo
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    Eurlo Banned

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    Yeah sounds great thanks:D

    No & it's a she.
    The gate keeper is the lands leader.
    She takes it camly,and organized,welcoming her in after talking first:)
     
  16. R-e-n-n-a-t
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    R-e-n-n-a-t Contributing Member

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    I liked the old name better, White Fang seems cliched, and copyrighted. Seriously, that name might be subject to copyright. I'd look it up if I were you.

    Also, if you plan on posting excerpts (I'm not saying you should if you want your idea completely safe, but if you do) then they should probably be in the review section.

    I like the idea, and as I mentioned before I like the old name more.
     
  17. Ellipse
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    Ellipse Contributing Member Contributor

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    I know your story is fantasy, but have you tried researching the behavior of wolves?
     
  18. Pen
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    A good point- there seems little point in having lupine characters if they don't act as you might expect wolves to act. Wolfish society for me summons memories of Kipling and "The Law of the Jungle".

    Feudalism, an enshrined social hierarchy with ascribed roles, would be the overall social model and I'd expect wolf ethics to be based on similar principles- right is what your lord and master says is right, and he in turn gets those instructions from his lord, and so on up to the King- traditional notions of good and evil would have to at least be adjusted for a society that has existed in a state of continuous struggle and has no democratic tradition.

    Individualism would probably be something akin to treason to a wolf pack, so that might put a strong cast on how the story is told- between wolves, it would probably be a cautionary tale or indeed a horror story of how poisonous selfishness subverted a Head Wolf who indulged the lower orders.

    Another question that might be worth asking is what are your character's flaws- I can't help but notice you've named yourself after him, and so you might identify quite strongly with him- this can lead to hero-centred morality and assorted other problems that occur when a hero faces too little adversity.
     
  19. Eurlo
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    Eurlo Banned

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    That whitefang is THE OLD ONE DUH!(name)
    I changed it that was in place to get my story started cause I can relate to it since iv read the book and watched the movie a ton:)
     
  20. Eurlo
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    Eurlo Banned

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    Regarding

    Yes I identify strongly with eurlo for the fact of when his name was brought to my attention I was so happy with the name that I attached to him like a tick:p
     
  21. Eurlo
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    Eurlo Banned

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    No but that might help I kinda jump into my book & got carried awayXD
     

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