I never believed in hell...that there would be ice cream. Yes, ice cream. You know why there was ice cream? Because I am lactose intollerant of course. Infact the only thing there was...was ice cream. Every flavor that you can imagine. "Rocky Road," "Bubble Gum," "Postachio," even that seasonal "Pumkin Pie" my Mom likes so much that I think tastes nothing like Pumpkin Pie. Hard as I looked there was no sorbet in site. You see sorbet is a great replacement for ice cream when you can't have ice cream. It comes in wonderful flavors too. Like "Pina Colada Ice" and "Rasberry." Doesn't suprise me though that something refreshing like sorbet can not be found in hell. Back to the ice cream. Can you imagine spending all of eternity eating something that makes you fart? So not only are you stuck in hell, getting fat on ice cream, you are forever surrounded in a cloud of your own lactose intollerant stench. You will never get a date, even in hell. Allthough, there was a nice selection of toppings to choose from. So there is that. This not what you expected from such a powerful starting statement? This just goes to show that not everyone sees such a statement as evil and dark. I often see things with the eyes of humor. Humor can be found in most things in life, even subjects such as hell. In fact I believe that in hell there is nothing but humor. Irony seems to be the devil's way of showing us his funny bone. Irony is often what you find after you have been through an episode one might refer to as a personal "hell." Irony is packing up your umbrella only to have it rain one more time that season. Irony is spending 2 hours at the tire place getting new tires only to drive over a nail 10 miles from the store, 5 minutes after they closed. Irony is giving your silver plated champagne bucket with 8 matching flutes in a white elephant exchange only to have the recepient sell it on Ebay for $2000.00. That is also friends what they call "a bitch." (As in "That's a bitch" not the reference to one's personality). So as I mentioned before, I never believed in hell that there would be Jamocha Almond Fudge with nuts on top.