1. Cornflower
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    Cornflower Member

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    I'm re-writing a story I already wrote

    Discussion in 'Character Development' started by Cornflower, Jan 20, 2011.

    I'm re-writing a story I already wrote but my one problem is character development. My characters don't get any character development I don't think (its hard for me to tell).
     
  2. Anonym
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    Anonym Contributing Member

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    I don't know what you could possibly expect given the dearth of details in your inquiry.. or statement, rather. You need to give a lot more detail if you're hoping for meaningful feedback... a synopsis or somethin'. Just my opinion.
     
  3. Cornflower
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    Cornflower Member

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    Its hard for me to do a synopsis without telling the whole story.

    Anne is a woman from the modern world, she accidentally arrives in Ellabur where she been prophesied about 23 years earlier. She falls in love with the prince (she doesn't know her love interest is a prince-neither does he) and than she gets trapped in a castle. Eats an Orange and falls into a "Sleeping Death" until the Prince kisses her.
     
  4. Anonym
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    Anonym Contributing Member

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    That's better, the last part sounds like Snow White to me.
    You've still only stated that you think you have a problem with character development & given 3 sentences of context. What feedback could anyone possibly give given what little we know?
    What aspect of the character's development is lacking? What are you having trouble with? What do you want? The more detailed the OP & context, the more people can help. You get what you put in, ideally.
     
  5. Mallory
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    Mallory Mallegory. Contributor

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    I obviously don't know much from a short paragraph sypnosis, but with a plot like that, it's important to make sure your character isn't a Mary Sue or that she isn't just a predictable Snow White clone.

    Your story could be good, or it could be really bad.

    I'd recommend you put a spin on it of some kind. Did she eat the orange deliberately because she's suicidal? If so, why? Does she have dependency issues? (Needing to be rescued by the prince) Why was she, as opposed to someone else, the one who was summoned after 23 years -- what makes her special? And be dang sure it isn't an annoying, Sue-ish reason.
     
  6. Trilby
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    Trilby Contributing Member Contributor

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    It's hard to tell, going from your second post I think you may be suffering from a touch of the tell instead of show syndrome.
    For characters to develop they need to have personal characteristics.
    Are they shy, bold, cheeky, honest, trustworthy, religious or what? You show this by their actions and through dialogue.
    Hope this helps.
     
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  7. Unit7
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    Unit7 Contributing Member Contributor

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    Quick Question: exactly how did you come up with that from a three sentence synopsis of the plot?
     
  8. Elgaisma
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    Elgaisma Contributing Member Contributor

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    Because the 3 sentence synopsis is all about the plot and contains little information about character it is about what they do not why they do it.

    Cornflower try and work out like Trilby says are your characters naturally shy, brave etc then use that to get them to react to situations in a way that reflects their personality.

    Also try the What Would Your MC do? Thread on here it will get you thinking about how those characters would react in scenarios you couldn't consider. Don't give cop out answers really think about it in context of your character and story.
     
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  9. Cornflower
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    Cornflower Member

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    There were 3 things in the room and the 3rd thing was the Orange (other two were Spinning Wheel and apple.) Anne being a bookworm and Disney movieworm (I made that word up) knew the apple was dangerous and she shouldn't touch either of them (apple or spinning wheel). But who ever heard of a poisoned Orange? That's why she thought it was safe.
     
  10. Elgaisma
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    Elgaisma Contributing Member Contributor

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    That is better there is more of Anne in it - now develop her a bit further just add one more sentence about Anne and what she does and why.
     
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  11. Cornflower
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    Cornflower Member

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    The tower she went into wasn't there when she was exploring earlier (probably between the 2 parts of Chapter 10) so she was curious enough to go into the tower-she know she shouldn't but her curiosity got the best of her. In an earlier chapter she and her love interest (they were starting to fall in love in that chapter) had an arugment
     
  12. Elgaisma
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    Elgaisma Contributing Member Contributor

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    now take her out of the story and put her in an everyday situation - maybe she is chosing clothes from your wardrobe, or her car gets a flat tyre - how does she handle that ?
     
  13. Cornflower
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    Cornflower Member

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    She just gets mad if she's running out of clothes.
     
  14. Elgaisma
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    Elgaisma Contributing Member Contributor

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    I find it easier if I consider it as a full blown scene, write it as I would part of the story - sometimes I have conversations with my characters it deepens them and makes writing them in the main situation easier, Gran is new I still haven't got a handle on her yet:

    Anya: Hey Soc, what do you think of our new home?
    Socrates: Hmm getting used to it, bit miffed I have to share you. Before it was just us.
    Anya: At least we get to chat on a regular basis now.
    Socrates: I hear you are planning on writing about people other than me. I don't like it, will be picketing.
    Anya: Picket away Soc, fact is your new story is giving me a headache.
    Socrates: Been giving me much worse given what you have done to me, you so can't leave it like that. Please Anya I do not want to be out of my mind indefiintely..
    Anya: OK pal what do you say I write passed that bit first - then take a break?
    Socrates: That works - think I could do with some time with Nate without you watching.
    Anya: Sounds like a plan - so see you in a couple of days when I have finished the short stories for the website ? Tomorrow I get to work with Gran.
    Socrates: Keep that woman away from me. She clouted me with her umbrella, the joke I told Gus wasn't that filthy.
    Anya: Hmm why do I suspect you deserved it.
    Socrates: Yeah well anyway if you are going to be mean, I'm not speaking anymore.
    Anya: Remind me again how old you are?
    Socrates: How should I bloody know get jet lag the way you move my age around.
    Anya: OK Soc take care I got loads to do and my kids want feeding
    Socrates: Next week then I guess

    OR another one

    Anya: Good morning Iris how are you today ?
    Gran: Me old bones are aching, but not bad.
    Anya: That is good to hear, what do you think of our new story?
    Gran: Not bad luv. Think I should 'ave a go at pretrifying those damn witches meself.
    Anya: I bet you could do it single handed with a glare and a whack of the umbrella :)
    Gran: Don't be rude. I 'aint that scary
    Anya: That isn't what Gus says
    Gran: Yeah well he is a silly man.
     
  15. Cornflower
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    Cornflower Member

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    She gets in an argument with Aramis (neither of who knows he's a prince yet) that "just because she's from the other species doesn't mean she helpless". I'm thinking of including a scene where she uses a bow&arrow. Since using a bowl and arrow would indicate she's not helpless. I'm also thinking of having some sleep-action taking place (Its like Sleeping Walking just more action-packed).
     
  16. Elgaisma
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    Elgaisma Contributing Member Contributor

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    do you know how you will use the sleepwalking to develop her?

    Also describing her body language and facial expressions in a scene can help, remembering to include some touch, maybe hearing. for example (this isn't ment to be good just an example):

    Anne comes upto the door of the tower. She had been told not to enter, but she doesn't care. She stops and listens for anyone approaching, nothing all she hears is some scuffling in the undergrowth. She reaches for the handle, she experiences a small moment of anxiety, what if the stories were true - she pulls her hand back. Shivering a little she tries again gingerly, her hand hovering over the door knob. Then she tosses her hair back and fixes her expression, saying to herself, 'Get a grip Anne, you need to know.' Defiantly she grabs the cold metal of the handle and turns.
     
  17. Cornflower
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    Cornflower Member

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    the tower wasn't there before hand-when she was exploring the castle after finding out about the prophecy (about her and Aramis)-so who could told her no? Hold on on a sec- the mouse Chole and Dove Peace could tell her "No">
     
  18. Elgaisma
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    Elgaisma Contributing Member Contributor

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    you don't have to write it like that I don't know your story it was just to help with ideas about how to use the other senses and Anne's feeling and body language.
     
  19. Trilby
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    Trilby Contributing Member Contributor

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    Quick answer: experience.
     

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