1. Jack Asher
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    Jack Asher Wildly experimental Contributor

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    IT'S NURSES WEEK

    Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by Jack Asher, May 6, 2014.

    It's nurses week, apparently. So if you know a nurse, or happen to be a nurse yourself, today is your day!
    [​IMG]
     
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  2. GingerCoffee
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    GingerCoffee Web Surfer Girl Contributor

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    :D

    The Ranks of a Hospital
    Surgeon:
    Leaps tall buildings in a single bound
    Is more productive than a train
    Is faster than a speeding bullet
    Walks on water
    Talks with God

    Internist:
    Leaps short buildings in a single bound
    Is more powerful than a switch engine
    Is faster than a speeding BB
    Walks on water if the sea is calm
    Talks with God if special request is approved

    General Practitioner:
    Leaps short buildings with a running start and favorable winds
    Is almost as powerful as a switch engine
    Can fire a speeding bullet
    Walks on water in an indoor swimming pool
    Is occasionally addressed by God

    Resident:
    Barely clears a picket fence
    Loses tug-of-war with a train
    Can sometimes handle a gun without inflicting self-injury
    Swims well
    Talks with animals

    Intern:
    Makes high skid marks on a wall when trying to leap buildings
    Is run over by a train
    Is not issued ammunition
    Dog paddles
    Talks to walls

    Medical Student:
    Runs into buildings
    Recognizes a train 2 out of 3 times
    Wets himself with a water pistol
    Cannot stay afloat without a life preserver
    Mumbles to himself

    Nurse:
    Lifts buildings and walks under them
    Kicks trains off the track
    Catches speeding bullets with her teeth and eats them
    Freezes water with a single glance
    The Nurse IS God!!!!

    Source unknown.
    http://www.npcentral.net/humor/sub.jokes.shtml
     
  3. minstrel
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    minstrel Leader of the Insquirrelgency Staff Supporter Contributor

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    @GingerCoffee: Let me guess: that list was written by a nurse, right?
     
  4. Jack Asher
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    Jack Asher Wildly experimental Contributor

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    *Gasp!* No!?
     
  5. GingerCoffee
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    GingerCoffee Web Surfer Girl Contributor

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    I have no idea, it's been around for decades. Could have been written by a doctor, we are appreciated quite a bit within many hospitals, especially teaching hospitals.

    I've worked in a dozen different settings and despite some of the uninformed posts here about nurses, in many of those settings we really are seen by the doctors as colleagues, not underlings. The nurse knows the hospital system better than the physicians and they know we have answers they don't about that system. They also know we have information about the patients they need and they rely on us to have.
     
  6. KaTrian
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    KaTrian A foolish little beast. Staff Supporter Contributor

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    I'm going to show those ranks to my students (soon to be registered/public health nurses). Make it into a language exercise :cool:
     
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