1. hawky94

    hawky94 Active Member

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    Main Character Synopsis for my first military fiction novel.

    Discussion in 'Character Development' started by hawky94, Jan 13, 2011.

    Main Character Synopsis

    Character Profile:

    Protagonist: Alex Jones.
    DOB: May 24th, 1984.
    Background:

    Alex Jones was born in London to a poor family, his father left him and his mother when he was seven. He'd never been that smart of a child, his marks in school were always drifting from being in the high-80's to low-70's. He left school at 16 and decided to join the military. He applied and passed the basic fitness and aptitude tests with ease. Having always been a good athlete, playing football and basketball at school, the standards for the basic fitness levels were much lower than he'd expected.

    His military career went from strength to strength which led to him ultimately being seconded to the SAS. He rose to the rank of Captain in the SAS and despite being a good soldier and the sort of man you'd want at your side, one decision ruined his military career. Out on an operation in Afghanistan to rescue three captured British aid workers, his four-man SAS team was partnered up with a four-man US Navy SEAL team. They reached the compound and secured it.

    Just when the order was about to be given for the team to swarm and rescue the aid workers, the American OC decided that the area was too hot and gave the order to stand down. Alex and his team disobeyed the order and rescued the three aid workers. He was court-martialled and kicked out of the military.

    Ever since his military career ended he's been in and out of various jobs, security guards for hotels, private security for diplomats that sort of thing. He's lonely and nearly jobless, a return to action is in order.
     
  2. Ellipse

    Ellipse Contributor Contributor

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    You may want to go into a bit more detail with the reasons for his court martial. Did disobeying his orders get his entire team killed despite rescuing hostages? Were the hostages injured? Was his CO a complete ass that hid evidence so the MC could be railroaded with a court-martial? Was the MC's discharge from the military honorable or dishonorable?
     
  3. vanarie

    vanarie New Member

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    I agree with Ellipse, perhaps it would be beneficial to put an innocent life on his hands so when he did get the court martial he was unwilling to fight it because of his internal guilt. Something that he feels he has to make amends for.
     
  4. Mallory

    Mallory Contributor Contributor

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    We can't exactly give feedback on basic character background and facts about the person. What you really need to focus on are things like goals, motivation, obstacles, fears/what bothers the MC most (not just trivial pet peeves but things that would actually hold the MC back or be a threat to him), changing points for either personality/motivation, etc. Hope I helped. :)
     
  5. Trilby

    Trilby Contributor Contributor

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    I'm not sure what you expect from us? what are you asking?
    Are you asking our opinion on the synopsis - as a synopsis. Or are you asking for our opinion and advice on the character - as a character?

    It reads more like a CV than a synopsis. A list.
    For a synopsis, as Malory said, you need to focus on his hopes, goals, fears...
     
  6. Cogito

    Cogito Former Mod, Retired Supporter Contributor

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    A character synopsis is about as useful as a chemical analysis of a gourmet meal would be to a food critic.
     
  7. Mallory

    Mallory Contributor Contributor

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    Btw, did you know there's a conspiracy theorist talk show host named Alex Jones? :D
     
    1 person likes this.
  8. Ellipse

    Ellipse Contributor Contributor

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    One more thing, assuming this story is in the US, the earliest a person can join the armed forces is at age 17 with parental consent. On top of that, if the MC dropped out of high school, most recruiters wouldn't even look at him. They rarely accept people with GEDs now.
     
  9. Mckk

    Mckk Member Supporter Contributor

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    You should read Lee Child. He's a bestselling author whose series is based on Jack Reacher, an ex-military cop :) He sorta "resigned" from the army after winning many honours and medals etc and is now a drifting loner, the sorta guy you don't wanna mess with and definitely don't like to follow rules. His books are action thrillers. Might be something good for you to study from?
     
  10. sidtvicious

    sidtvicious Contributor Contributor

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    Was about to bring that up.
     
  11. barlettaborn

    barlettaborn New Member

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    Just a quick question I dont really understand the grades you've mentioned high 80's low 70's? Is that an American grade system?
     
  12. Ellipse

    Ellipse Contributor Contributor

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    Yea, it's sort of like a percentage system. 90-100 = A. 80-89 = B. 70-79 = C. 60-69 = D. 0-59 = F.
     

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