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  1. Medic
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    Medic New Member

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    Need help improve a blurb (Military Fiction)

    Discussion in 'Plot Development' started by Medic, Oct 23, 2008.

    Hello all, I need some help in improving the blurb below. I am simply not happy with how it reads, think it sounds quite amature. Can I have some thoughts and advice please.

    For those that do not know the Special Air Service (SAS) is a special forces regiment within the British Army.

    Lieutenant Scott Kray of the SAS leads a daring raid on an Taliban stronghold deep inside Afghanistan, and reveals the unthinkable. What is found is a document, a document that could shatter the very foundations of the western world as we know it. Kray must get the information back to his government if they are to stand any chance of stopping and expose a terrifying secret. Kray is forced to confront terrifying enemies not only on the battle field but in the murky shadows of the intelligence services on both sides of the Atlantic.....
     
  2. Cogito
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    Cogito Former Mod, Retired Supporter Contributor

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    Sorry, but all writing posted for comment/assistance must be posted in one of the Review Room forums. This applies to blurbs as well, even though short (poems are short too!).
     
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