Not sure why I'm posting this, other than to just unload, but I have a dilemma. An aunty of mine is expected to pass away over the weekend and one of her grandsons has contacted her family to say that anyone who wants to say goodbye needs to do so ASAP. The lady in question is my dad's sister-in-law, whom I haven't seen in a good number of years, and when asked by my parents whether I wanted to go with them the next time they visited, I said I didn't, and that I'd rather say goodbye at the funeral. Regret in not saying goodbye isn't a concern. It's not that I'm uncaring, but as with most families we drift far away from most of our uncles and aunties as we grow older, and I just don't feel the 'need' to say goodbye. However, my one concern is that I'm being selfish and need to consider how my parents - especially my dad - might feel about my decision not to go and see her. He says he fully understands and has not put any pressure on me at all, but then he probably would say that anyway. I don't mind admitting that my decision is partly borne out of cowardice on my part. It would be awkward and upsetting to see her in such a state, but I still don't feel it's something I need to do. Am I being selfish and immature over this?