People with "Internet Muscles"

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by seelifein69, Nov 2, 2011.

  1. Arathald

    Arathald New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 11, 2011
    Messages:
    313
    Likes Received:
    17
    Location:
    Seattle
    For what it's worth (very little), I'd imagine that such a story *would* redefine a genre. Now, whether that's a good or a bad thing remains to be debated.
    (now back to your regularly scheduled discussion)

    Edit: Okay, now I *really* want to write that. It'll probably be a complete load of utter crap, but that's how all writing starts out anyway.
     
  2. shadowwalker

    shadowwalker Contributor Contributor

    Joined:
    Jul 27, 2011
    Messages:
    3,258
    Likes Received:
    847
    I know it's possible to have arguments and spirited discussions and still remain polite. It's called 'maturity'.
     
  3. Trilby

    Trilby Contributor Contributor

    Joined:
    Jun 21, 2010
    Messages:
    2,097
    Likes Received:
    73
    Location:
    NE England
    I am quite happy with the mods on this site they do a good job sorting 'the men out from the little boys'. And to prove I am sincere in what I say there's a rep for Banzia, and Cogito when I can find him, they have both more than earned it.
     
  4. mammamaia

    mammamaia nit-picker-in-chief Contributor

    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2006
    Messages:
    19,150
    Likes Received:
    1,034
    Location:
    Coquille, Oregon
    huh?... how does that make it any less rude than just plain 'moronic'? [or were you trying to be funny there?]

    i'd really like some serious opinions on this, if anyone here cares to help me out a bit...
     
  5. shadowwalker

    shadowwalker Contributor Contributor

    Joined:
    Jul 27, 2011
    Messages:
    3,258
    Likes Received:
    847
    Yeah, it's rude. One can say "I don't agree" or "I don't understand that" or "???". Saying something is moronic is placing the one saying it on some kind of self-awarded upper plateau.
     
  6. bobnr32

    bobnr32 New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2011
    Messages:
    23
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Bucharest
    I have been a vicitm of cyber-bullying on other sites. It is so easy to be brave online and say things that some people would dare not say face to face.
     
  7. Alex W

    Alex W New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 4, 2011
    Messages:
    202
    Likes Received:
    7
    Indeed. And some discussions between people on here that became lively but civil have been taken down fro what i've seen, which seems a shame.

    Not sure if this is a nod to my comment or not, if so I wasn't trying to demean the mods, they must have a tough job with such a big site, it was just one instance where I felt how one of them acted was a bit pathetic.

    I've been a moderator on a large forum before so I know that it's a busy task at times, dealing with all the trolls and arseholes. This forum seems to be run fairly well, on the whole.
     
  8. seelifein69

    seelifein69 Active Member

    Joined:
    Jun 20, 2011
    Messages:
    204
    Likes Received:
    7
    Location:
    SW Florida


    That is exactly what I'm talking about (calling something 'frankly moronic'). There is just no need to be like that with people.

    And a lot of people write on here because they are too afraid to share their writing with anyone else. I get that not everyone is a genius and I get that not everyone has great skills, people are here to learn, not to be frightened to ever post anything again.
     
  9. art

    art Contributor Contributor

    Joined:
    Sep 5, 2010
    Messages:
    1,153
    Likes Received:
    117
    FWIW I think the poster was being entirely serious. Absolutely so.

    When I have harsh words to say to folk I will often deploy 'frankly' to render the message more palatable - less rude perhaps.

    By being 'frank' you are assuring the other of your unflinching honesty and perhaps exposing yourself at some cost, often, for the good of the the other. Thus, for 'frankly', read 'what I'm about to say is a little unpleasant and perhaps, indeed, makes me look unpleasant, but still, I say it, because I am a lover of truth and you need to hear this.' In polite circles - my circles, to be frank with you - the listener is bound to cut the talker a good deal of slack should the 'frankly' card be played.

    Conversational tyros often preface their criticisms with the the expression ' to be honest ' thinking that the phrase does the same job as 'frankly'. It does not, of course. Laughable foolishness on their part.
     
  10. shadowwalker

    shadowwalker Contributor Contributor

    Joined:
    Jul 27, 2011
    Messages:
    3,258
    Likes Received:
    847
    I use 'frankly' quite a bit - never as a preface to being rude. I don't expect anyone to allow me to be impolite just because I use 'frankly' or 'I'm going to be blunt' or 'forgive me for saying this, but...' or any other caveat that people like to use.

    If someone can't express themselves without being rude, everyone is better off if they just keep quiet. Not only is the actual message lost, it makes the speaker look bad and makes the spoken to feel worse.
     
  11. RusticOnion

    RusticOnion New Member

    Joined:
    Nov 3, 2011
    Messages:
    306
    Likes Received:
    8
    If it's good you better reference me.:p
     
  12. Steerpike

    Steerpike Felis amatus Contributor

    Joined:
    Jul 5, 2010
    Messages:
    13,984
    Likes Received:
    8,557
    Location:
    California, US
    People have varying degrees of sensitivity toward this sort of thing. The question is whether everyone must or should word their comments so as not to offend the most sensitive on the forums. I do not think that should be the case. And I also think lively discussions are shut down too quickly on the site, before they've had a chance to play themselves out (in which case such conversations usually end up just fine with everyone resolving their issues on their own). And I think trolls are rewarded by the policy of locking a thread when a troll shows up in it.

    See, there is no pleasing me :D

    I'm not easily offended, and I enjoy sarcasm and good-natured ribbing. I think those things can be distinguished from plain meanness or rudeness, but I think not everyone has the capacity to make the distinction.
     
  13. RusticOnion

    RusticOnion New Member

    Joined:
    Nov 3, 2011
    Messages:
    306
    Likes Received:
    8
    ^ I agree, but I also think there is a time and a place for "ribbing."
    And people commenting on a thread should take into consideration who made the thread and what their intentions were, which I grant you can sometimes be hard to discern.
    In regards to debating I think we can all agree that alot of debates get easily derailed and can quickly become overly hostile... not that I don't enjoy starting debates...
     
  14. Man in the Box

    Man in the Box Active Member

    Joined:
    Jun 21, 2011
    Messages:
    254
    Likes Received:
    41
    Location:
    Brazil
    To the OP: it seems you haven't really experienced "rude" yet. Try out gaming community forums to see what I mean. I've seen many forums full of angry teenagers ready to bully you at any instant, for nothing. Also, the YouTube comments section is full of people saying crap about videos, and so on. Anonymity is one of the gifts from the internet, but also a kind of poison.

    In this forum, on the other hand, I've seen nothing but educated people and, all the time I needed help, they provided me with constructive criticism. The people in this forum are always helpful and polite and I've yet to see a member here sound harsh to another during my short membership. I'm rather sensitive to criticism so I should know very well. :D
     
  15. VM80

    VM80 Contributor Contributor

    Joined:
    Nov 16, 2010
    Messages:
    1,209
    Likes Received:
    46
    I agree with everything you say, especially the last sentence. Seen it happen here and on other forums a lot. Often it's a cultural thing; some of what is completely normal speech, say, here in England could be seen in a quite different light elsewhere.

    As for plain 'rudeness', well I wouldn't lose sleep over it. I might give as good as I get though, if need be.
     
  16. bobnr32

    bobnr32 New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2011
    Messages:
    23
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Bucharest
    How can rudeness ever be justified?
     
  17. Lemex

    Lemex That's Lord Lemex to you. Contributor

    Joined:
    Oct 2, 2007
    Messages:
    10,704
    Likes Received:
    3,425
    Location:
    Northeast England
    I could see that getting pretty messy. Making a silly comment can happen to anyone. Even to the best of us.

    And even if you made a good point in a post it would be so easily abused by another user with a differing opinion.
     
  18. Trilby

    Trilby Contributor Contributor

    Joined:
    Jun 21, 2010
    Messages:
    2,097
    Likes Received:
    73
    Location:
    NE England
    'Sarcasm the lowest form of wit' - a well known saying.

    Sarcasm n a scornful or ironic remark; the use of this - the dictionary's explanation.


    Lighthearted sarcasm if used with good intent among friends can be amusing and acceptable. Sarcasm can also be mean, hurtful and demeaning.

    I know a couple of sarcastic men and I do not like either of them. Both of them pick on the weak and vulnerable in a company and if their victim looks hurt or embarrassed; they seem to get a kick out of it. If their victim fights back; then they say 'can't take a joke' or 'no sense of humour' or 'touchy, touchy' and although both these men in question live in different countries, one in England the other in Scotland, both their wives laugh it off saying 'Take no notice of him it's just the way he is' or 'he doesn't mean it' or 'it's just a bit of fun.' or words to that effect. But both these men, I have noticed that if there is someone is in their company with a bit of authority or maybe they just have a few bob; then both these sarcastic men will unashamedly flatter and stick their heads up the ar... of the people they are trying to impress.



    Answer, It can never be justified.
     
  19. RusticOnion

    RusticOnion New Member

    Joined:
    Nov 3, 2011
    Messages:
    306
    Likes Received:
    8
    I think we've all taken this a tad too far.
     
  20. VM80

    VM80 Contributor Contributor

    Joined:
    Nov 16, 2010
    Messages:
    1,209
    Likes Received:
    46
    There's a certain finesse to sarcasm, and using it in such a way that it doesn't get 'nasty'. Again, for some it's a fine line to draw.

    Who's justifying rudeness? It's something I try to avoid all the time, but then it's a part of life. You can bet your life if
    someone were to be rude (especially to someone I care about), they'd hear from me about it. That's normal.
     
  21. Banzai

    Banzai One-time Mod, but on the road to recovery Contributor

    Joined:
    Mar 31, 2007
    Messages:
    12,834
    Likes Received:
    151
    Location:
    Reading, UK
    There's also a cultural difference. I tend to use sarcasm and dry comments quite flippantly, which I think is the norm in the UK- whereas American members might interpret it as me being a dickhead.
     
  22. mammamaia

    mammamaia nit-picker-in-chief Contributor

    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2006
    Messages:
    19,150
    Likes Received:
    1,034
    Location:
    Coquille, Oregon
    thanks for the input, folks!... i'm glad to see that i'm not alone in having taken 'frankly moronic' as being rude...

    the poster's then putting me down for having taken it that way made it even more of an insult, imo...
     
  23. JPGriffin

    JPGriffin New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 8, 2011
    Messages:
    180
    Likes Received:
    5
    Location:
    Connecticut
    In what context was this posted? If there wasn't any other constructive criticism, then of course it's downright rude, but if he or she was trying to earnestly help build your writing skills, then it can be seen as appropriate (maybe).
     
  24. shadowwalker

    shadowwalker Contributor Contributor

    Joined:
    Jul 27, 2011
    Messages:
    3,258
    Likes Received:
    847
    Not appropriate unless talking about something a character said.

    I don't think people have to handle others with kid gloves, but when getting ready to make a less-than-polite comment (and come on - we all know the difference), we should ask ourselves why. If we're having a bad day, we shouldn't choose that day to critique. If we're tired of seeing the same mistake, step back and either count to ten before responding or just don't respond. And for heaven's sake, remember those emoticons. A :) or ;) can really take the edge off any 'misunderstandings'.
     
  25. mammamaia

    mammamaia nit-picker-in-chief Contributor

    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2006
    Messages:
    19,150
    Likes Received:
    1,034
    Location:
    Coquille, Oregon
    it was actually a cut about my advice to the op, not about any writing work of my own... which made it even more unacceptable, i thought...
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice