1. hollywood.dreams
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    hollywood.dreams New Member

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    pregnant?

    Discussion in 'Character Development' started by hollywood.dreams, May 18, 2009.

    The main character in my story is pregnant and fourteen years old.. I have her mostly thinking about how happy she is, how much she loves the baby, etc. I want to show how immature she really is, how she doesn't realize how hard it is to take care of a baby, especially being so young. I don't want to do something really cliche, like having her babysit or something and have this huge epiphany about it. But I can't think of anything else! Suggestions? :]
     
  2. architectus
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    architectus Banned

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    Maybe her cousin visits who just had a baby and your MC sees how hard it is by watching her and helping out?
     
  3. arron89
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    arron89 Banned

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    Sounds like she needs an adventure to Wonderland! It helped for Alice, after all...
    Nothing better than surreal fiction...
     
  4. Cogito
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    Cogito Former Mod, Retired Supporter Contributor

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    You shopuld try to get to know someone in that situation, or who has been in that situation. Every degree of separation will diminish yoru ability to write about the character convincingly.
     
  5. madhoca
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    madhoca Contributing Member Contributor

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    How many months pregnant is she? When I was 3 months pregnant my 'morning sickness' started to get worse and worse until I could hardly get out of bed and I was on a drip at one point having lost so much weight. That was a real test of how much I wanted the baby, at one point I wanted to hurl myself off our 15th floor balcony! It lasted until the baby was born--the first full meal I ate three days later was the most delicious I've ever tasted!
     
  6. hollywood.dreams
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    hollywood.dreams New Member

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    She's 38 weeks, not sure how many months, hahah.
     
  7. fantasy girl
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    fantasy girl Contributing Member

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    how old are you to start off with? if you can, why dont you go to the local nursary and find out for yourself how hard it is or like cog said, try to get to know someone in that or a similar position and find out how they delt with it.
     
  8. NaCl
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    NaCl Contributing Member Contributor

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    Do a Google search under "adolescent pregnancy stories". There are lots of personal stories and if you search under "adolescent pregnancy", you'll find lots of professional discussions about teen pregnancies, including the problems these new moms face.

    More important, if you aspire to become a writer, you need to learn how to research. With Google, Yahoo and similar search engines, there is no shortage of information. All you have to do is learn to serarate the fact from fiction. As far as the advice to talk with someone who endured a teen pregnancy, I would advise against that because any similarity to her experience that made it into your story might expose you to serious legal issues.
     
  9. daturaonfire
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    daturaonfire Senior Member

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    Let me make sure I got you: you need ways to show that your fourteen-year-old has way unrealistic ideas about motherhood, right? A naieve, but otherwise likable, young girl could shrug off concerned questions about her and her baby's future. "Everything will work out." She might prefer to page through baby name books instead of What to Expect. If she's still working, she might spend hundreds of dollars on a frilly crib, then have no money left over for diapers and formula. Thoughts about getting back into her size 2 jeans might occupy her more than how she's going to go to school and take care of a baby. Basically, remember what it's like to be a fourteen-year-old girl. = )
     
  10. hollywood.dreams
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    hollywood.dreams New Member

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    I don't have to remember, because I am a fourteen year old girl. hahah. :]
     
  11. fantasy girl
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    fantasy girl Contributing Member

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    well, we have a week off next week, if you do, why dont you go downto the local nursary, get some experience of your own. that way, you will get the idea of how hard it acctually is to look after a child. i am also 14 (well almost) and i did a similar subject, so i went down to the nursary and it actually helped.
     
  12. Nervous1st
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    Nervous1st Senior Member

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    Hi OP,

    In reality and cetainly in my experience, nothing can prepare you for the arrival of a new born. I am the eldest of 5 siblings, the youngest being 20 years my junior. I have had numerous babysitting jobs and all of my close girlfriends have had kids before me. Absolutely nothing prepared me for the sleepless nights - when days and nights blend into one or breastfeeding until your nipples are cracked and bleeding. As natural as it is, breastfeeding is probably one of the hardest parts of having a baby and no long lost friend with a baby or babysitting job is going to tell you about that!

    The truth is, all first time Mothers worry about the birth, but seldom think past bringing the baby home from the hospital. Sure, I had the cot, the clothes, the pram, the car seat, but I had no idea of the basics like, how often to feed the baby or how to sterilize feeding equipment.

    If it works in with your story, I would continue going with the “everything will be ok” version until the baby comes along. The truth of having a baby will set in very quickly once it arrives. This will be a lot more realistic that way.

    This is just my opinion, of course.

    Good luck.

    NB: My sister was pregnant at 14 and had the baby at 15. If you need any help feel free to PM me.
     
  13. Torana
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    Torana Contributing Member Contributor

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    I have witnessed females of many different ages becoming mothers and have noticed that sometimes 14 year olds make better parents than woman who are in there 30-40's.

    I think the best thing you could do is go do a google search for articles about parenting, teen parenting experiences, etc.

    I could give you lots of imformation on things I have seen with younger mums who are too immature as such, to cope with a young baby, but at the same time, I can also give you information on younger mums who I have seen do a far better job with being a parent than some woman who are in their late 20's to early 40's with new born babies.

    It really does depend on the invidual, NOT the age.

    One very classic example of a parent who needs a little adive on parenting is when they take there child outside and it is not dressed suitable for the weather conditions. Winter and pouring down with rain, the baby is in a little dress/singlet and nappy, with no blanket to keep it warm. (I see this far too often)
     
  14. Ashleigh
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    Ashleigh Contributing Member Contributor

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    I see this alot too when i'm out and about, and sometimes I just want to slap the mother's into sense!

    I think that'd be a good example though - things like taking nappies and bottles and whipes out with them, and making sure they have things on hand if the weather changes or the baby's clothes needed changeing...all kinds.

    Maybe if your character experienced some sort of panic when out with the baby, and had left the house totally unprepared, she'd realise that caring for a child isn't as simple as just leaving the house with them? (I don't mean at all to suggest that a young mum would necessarily make this mistake, but a naive mum certainly could, and as Torana says, Naivity comes from the individual and not necessarily the age they are)
     
  15. RomanticRose
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    RomanticRose Active Member

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    Since the length of a human pregnancy is 38-40 weeks from the date of the last menstrual period, she really won't have much time to learn this.
     
  16. x_raichelle_x
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    x_raichelle_x Contributing Member

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    Oooh this sounds good! I agree with the idea that naivity is more to do with the individual rather than the age.
    I got pregnant at 18, but I'll be the first to admit I had no idea how hard motherhood was going to be, and was ridiculously naive about it all looking back.
    Maybe you could have her saying to her friends that she could still hang out with them all the time, & a 'nothings gonna change, it's only a baby' kinda attitude. Have her forgetting to take her folic acid tablets (this is really important in pregnancy to stop spina bifida) or putting a sexy nightie in her hospital bag for after the birth rather than a set of comfy pyjamas. Not that I did any of these things lol, but it's the kinda thing I can imagine happening. Nothing too extreme, but still shows how much she's got left to learn.
    Hope that helps :)
    xxxxxx
     
  17. Sound of Silence
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    Sound of Silence Member

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    To introduce her as 'settled' with what's going on maybe isn't the best reflection of pregnancy. Pregnancy itself plays havoc with your hormones, so one minute she'd be up, the next down. You'd need to reflect those changes, then things like like how those around her have reacted and how she's reacted to them will no doubt come in.
     
  18. arron89
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    arron89 Banned

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    Or you could have an invisible cat and a talking rabbit and an insane tea party

    just saying, i know which one i'd rather read XD
     
  19. hollywood.dreams
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    hollywood.dreams New Member

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    Yes, I know that. So I'm either going to have her learn it once she actually has the baby, or I'll have her be only 20 weeks or something.
     
  20. TheNewGuy
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    TheNewGuy Senior Member

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    Hello again, hollywood.

    If I was her boyfriend I'm make dang-well sure that she knew the hell she was entering in to as soon as she found out tha she was prenant. Just in case she wanted to 'change her mind.'

    Perhaps you can make someone she knows pro-choice, and her (or her friends) be decidedly pro-life?

    This situation has never been a problem for me, thank whoever ya want.
     
  21. Brightsmiles
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    Brightsmiles Senior Member

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    just a heads up, both time i was pregnant (first time i was 18) once i hit the 32/33 weeks, i just wanted the damn thing out! i had stretch marks everywhere, i'd put on 25kg (60lb?) i had kankles i was that swollen with fluid - my boobs hurt so bad - and i could never get comfortable trying to sleep. (4ft 11 and my belly was as wide as i was tall lol) i def wanted it out - even though we were really excited to have her. it doesn't matter how much you love the kid or want them, you eventually hit a stage where you think 'i want it out now!'

    fyi the exciting stages are
    12-14 weeks - you've passed the danger stage of loosing baby and made it to the second trimester.
    16-18 weeks is when most ppl will start to feel the baby move (i'm so tiny i felt my bubs move 14/15 weeks)
    18-22 weeks is ultrasound time to find out the gender and see if anything is wrong/make sure bub is developing well...

    after that its just getting bigger, fatter and emotionally nuts. nesting instinct was always the biggy for me. i'd go crazy if someone messed up the house. a dirty towel on the bathroom floor would have me in tears cause i just wanted everything to be perfect and ready.

    anhoo - i think 38 wks is a bit late for an epiphany... maybe when she first feels the baby move and its an 'oh crap, its an actual living being that's gonna need me and cry a lot' idk.
    good luck with it though!
     
  22. daydreamer
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    daydreamer Contributing Member

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    There will be no epiphany nor any overwhelming sense of the responsibilty of it all until the baby is actually born and she has to deal with the crying, sleepless night, being tied down.

    Maybe the best thing to do is to continue to show her naivety until the birth and then you have a strong contrast with the reality.

    If she is 38 weeks pregnant, you could bring the birth forward.
     
  23. fantasy girl
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    fantasy girl Contributing Member

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    maby have her have a premature birth or something?
     
  24. Brightsmiles
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    Brightsmiles Senior Member

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    maybe not with your first, but i swear i got a good dose of it as soon as i saw that positive stick with bubby #2 lol
     
  25. Nervous1st
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    Nervous1st Senior Member

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    LOL brightsmiles! Ah, the joys.

    We seriously need a Mother's thread!
     

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