@BFGuru: I'm not going to ask you to tell me, simply because I can't guarantee that I'll use it in my novel, and I don't want to make you tell me something so important for you, and then just leave it be...So I'll leave it up to you. In any case, I think I'm already decided about what to do. To all, I'm finally decided about using the gf incident. The thing is, with this I'm stumbling with another dilemma. I've got one choice to make, and that is whether the gf just cheated on him, or the gf died. The cause of death would be something that would involve him greatly, like a car accident or something like that, thus he blames himself for her death. The thing is, choosing one of them makes me think about the way he'd move on from that, how he will do it. If I'm making the gf cheating, then I could, as someone here said before, bring the idea that he has to separate this affiction or hobby of his from the relationship, and not let her ruin his life just like that. But if I'm making the gf dead, and the guy feeling guilty about it, what reason or what could convince him about it not being his fault at all? Because I really don't think that a simple "It's not your fault, don't blame yourself." coming from the female MC would heal him at all.
Although you certainly can have the guy feeling guilty about somehow being responsible for the gf's death, it's not a requirement. You have three options -- 1) he was somehow responsible for the death -- he was driving a car and was at fault for an accident or something; 2) they were both in a common accident that wasn't his or her fault but either the fault of some third party or Act of God. Your MC feels 'survivor's guilt' for him surviving and her not; 3) the gf dies in some way that is totally unrelated to him, like she gets sick and dies or goes on a business trip and is in a plane crash or murdered or something. In all of these scenarios, his grief could be totally wrapped up in a common interest they shared like the piano, irrespective of whether he feels guilt about the death. If you have a desire to write about the guilt aspect, by all means do so -- it is completely valid. But you could also make his grief so great that he can't think about the piano without her and is just so upset that she's gone, etc. If this was a serious gf that he had planned on marrying and was really a special person in his life, his grief and upset would involve more than just the loss of her companionship, although he would feel that acutely on a daily basis, but it would change everything about what he thought his life was going to be -- his whole future, including kids (or not), trips together, projects they'd planned, the house they'd live in, what they'd do when they retired, etc. He has to change his whole world view, and that would include bringing back the music he loved and adjusting his life plan to still have a life even though she's not with him. So you're right, the death would require way more than a simple "don't blame yourself" kind of advice.
I don't think a cheating girlfriend would be severe enough to make any self respecting musician give up on his/her trade. Death, yes. Break ups? Not so much. Music is a part of serious musicians and they don't walk away from it that easily. The death and self inflicted guilt is pretty serious thing though. It has potential. It's going to take a lot of personal working through to get past the feeling of guilt. It's part of the grieving process naturally, but if he was responsible, by way of driving (intoxicated or passing out) then he's going to grapple with a lot of guilt and for a long while. Perhaps he's got a pathological process going on that's hard to diagnose and because he had been drinking (but maybe not intoxicated), the black out that caused the accident was blamed on the drinking but years later, when the black outs continue they find out that it was what caused his accident causing black out and not the alcohol.
@BFGuru: I also think so, that's why I'm leaning more towards the gf's death. Actually, the accident itself it's not really important, since I'm probably doing it just like chicagoliz said, like a survivor's guilt. The thing is, -how- is he going to overcome that? @Chicagoliz: [[So you're right, the death would require way more than a simple "don't blame yourself" kind of advice.]] That's the most difficult part of all XD; I know it would take lot of time before he can actually move on from it, but there should be something that would trigger that.
Yeah, a broken heart most moves the musician closer to his instrument, not farther away. I would definitely go with the "survivor's guilt" angle, unless there's an aspect of his personality which makes that seem implausible.
Have him making up a song for her on the spot, singing it out loud, being sort of silly because he's tipsy. When he hears music after that, he can be reminded of the song he was writing for her and the accident simultaneously. It will bring a lot of flash backs at that point and have music be hard to deal with.
You could do injury. Something muscular. I remember reading about a pianist in the book The Mind's Eye by Oliver Sacks. She had a slowly progressive neurological disorder that made music scores unintelligible and foreign to her. The pianist doesn't have to fully comprehend what the disorder is because of the medical lingo involved. He could also be depressed because of a death. Could be the parents, a friend, a lover. Said person could have even mentored him, making him associate that person with his love for piano.
I quit playing the violin because my teacher scared the c!*p out of me. I later got pressurized into taking it back up with a teacher who was lovely but the damage was done. Just the sight of a violin made my break out in a cold sweat.
I know when i was younger i quit playing the saxophone for the simple reason that i couldn't carry the damn thing to the lessons! When i was older i came across an inspirational music teacher, after speaking with him i started playing again, and although i don't play professionally, i still pick it up every so often.
He needed $4,000 to bring his 1900's baby grand back to life (no only kidding...that's why I stopped playing). But more seriously, I think life often gets in the way, and then you slowly watch your dreams change. Piano might have been the thing he let slip away, and then he felt he had lost proficiency and it was easier to let that go than to try to get it back??
I'm talking slight buzz, not tipsy enough to forget. I've never been drunk. I've been slightly buzzed before. And I remember every detail of those experiences.
