I struggle with the grammar of my dialog sometimes. I started out with: But there are four people in the dialog, and it seemed necessary for the reader to get the quality of the woman's voice as soon as possible, instead of reading both sentences and then realizing, oh, that's Susan saying that, so I went with: Too much asked and said for my taste. Finally: It reads okay to me, but I don't really get if I can have her say a complete sentence and then continue by ending with what would be a run-on sentence. I imagine a solution would be: That works grammatically I guess, but it just reads stiffer to me than the third version. And yes, I am trying to get some meds for my obsessive / compulsive disorder.