Got a dumb-ass neighbor. Not a real one. Other neighbors call him that. Not an irritating neighbor but then again he's far enough away not to be irritating, just to those who live across the street and next door. It the kids. But I say: SO WHAT? They're active and mostly in a good way. Granted I'm probably just far enough away to say that. Taylor, Bailey and Chance, named because they took a chance and lost with another boy. Success on the fourth with Madison. Now I'm to their dog. ACE. And it names that play such a crucial roll in life and that's my fucking rant. My son and daughter-in-law have chosen the name Ace for their baby boy. Well fuck me with a chain saw! How in the hell can parents name children such fucked-up names?! Ace is as is worse than Moon Unit, the child of acid dropping Frank Zappa, a guitarist from the sixties. Hell! My damn dumb-ass neighbor's got more sense! It won't affect my life but what happens to kids named Ace? If nothing else matters in life, names do. How others react to a name create a reality through perception. What kind of girls would date an Ace? What kind of girl takes an Ace to meet parents? Oh yeah! The kind with a father in jail and mom's some basket case on drugs. The kind of girl that has a fucking snake tattoo on the top of her ass-crack. And when they get serious, she'll add the umpteenth fucking rattle on the snake's tail. Is it just me or what? How can you not have a couple of back-up names just in case when you see the little guy, "Oh Shit! He's not that one in a hundred million who should be named Ace! This is Patrick! This is Jacob!" There's a greater chance the little fella will come out looking like a Moon Unit or a Jingleheimer-Schmidt Anyways, my little Mikey has grown up to think Ace is such a cool name...Just like the fucking dog down the street. Either he's retarded or it's providence. Could be both. Had nowhere else to go with this and still don't feel better.
Michael, where I live it is very common for parents to name their kids with very similar names. You'll hear siblings named: Jadriel & Jaxiel Yomair & Yojaira (J makes an H sound in Spanish) José & Josue And dozens of other permutations. Besides the utter confusion that is going to cause later in life, all I can think when I hear that is that the younger of the two is going to forever live with the idea that he/she has the second choice out of two original choices. That is fuuuuuqed up.
As the parent of two adult children with cognitive impairments, I can tell you a) no, he isn't and b) this wasn't funny.
Ace is a fine name, similar to Brock or Chevy. Works well if you want to be the high school football quarterback. My daughters middle name is Love, and I think it's a cool middle name. I also agree with Ed, that term has gone out of style for reasons of respect and decency. I do agree with the issue with weird names like Apple, though.
I knew a guy who went by the name Ace. It was actually his initials: A.C.E. His first name was really Alvon, so I kinda understand why he preferred Ace.
I had an uncle named, Ace. I've never thought it was a weird name. And I'm with Ed, have you not learned the word, "retarded", is insensitive and not an appropriate thing to say?
Oh, well, you're not going to get much sympathy from me. While I don't necessarily like the name Ace, it's not my child. They're not naming the kid Apple, or Anus, or Megaman, or Goatface or Twitter or Nevaeh (heaven spelled backwards)... so, I think it's fine. I, personally, like names that aren't in the norm. I think there are enough Saras, Michaels, Johns, and Jennifers in the world. Ace is unique. They'll never have to worry about being Ace#1 or Ace#2 in a class. I don't feel that it's a name that can really be made fun of. *shrugs* I think you're making a mountain out of a mole hill. Little Mikey was probably sick of being the 5th Mikey in a class and decided that he wanted his kid to not deal with that.
This reminds me of the Bill Cosby joke from WAY back in the day where he thought his name was something totally different than it actually was. - Bill Cosby http://www.mustsharejokes.com/page/Bill+Cosby+Jokes
Worked once with a guy from Hungary and he told me many stories of his country and family. His work with Oppenheimer on the Manhattan Project, Bella Lagosi, the Gabor Sister who were unaffectionately referred to as the "four bitches" in his country. And he told me stories about his retarded daughter who did so many stupid things. I thought nothing of it. When he wanted to teach a Nuclear Physics Class in Budapest, he needed one more student but couldn't find one. Finally added his retarded daughter to the role and Wa-La. He taught Nuclear Physics. His retarded daughter is now an Electrical Engineer and a Professor at NYU. My retarded son has an MS in Mechanical Engineering and to answer your question, "Have I learned?" How I rant about my children has nothing to do with anyone else's family and friends. And if it's taken as though I've cross a line because it's a word used by people in an manner to degrade and ridicule others doesn't give a carte blanche another group to claim the use of the word retard has but one context. So there it is. If you're still buzzed by this context and think I'm insensitive...Oh well. And To Cartographers: b) "Retarded" is not okay as a negative descriptor. Are you twelve? No...Not twelve. There is not a "negative descriptor" in my rant. That's your assumption. c) Proof-read your work. Even your rants. It's fine to write informally, but try not to sound illiterate. Sound illiterate? Nothing auditory here. Perhaps you haven't noticed...Everything is written. Or is there another context? That's rhetorical
Ace...It's gonna take a while. Won't matter when I see him. Snake women are years away. Maybe never. There's a pretty good writer named Ace. Maybe I'll get John to change his dog's name. I played Frank Zappa in a chess match once and he beat like a drum. Can't believe he named his children Moon Unit and Dwizle so it could be worse. On occasion I'll write something that just seems to bring the "Writing Nazis" out. You have taken the high road and been most helpful and I thank you for it.
If I want to see videos of freak-a-zoids I'll go to U-Tube. But that's an assumption on my part because of the made-up the dude is wearing and his eyes are screaming crazy. Here I just write because I'm on break.
Damn dude chill out. It ain't like Ace is the most disgusting and uncommon name of all time. Kinda cool actually
Personally, I think they could have picked worse. I once knew two sisters called "America" and "China". In some countries there is actually legislation that prevents parents from giving their children names that are likely to harm them.
Hey instead of calling someone retarded. Just *slaps hands together and makes walrus sounds* I am the eggman they are the egg men I am the walrus *slaps hands together and makes walrus sounds*
@GingerCoffee: I love Tim Minchin, good call @Michael O: If you wanted to come across as an offensive and demented old grandpa who drinks too much and then rants on the internet, congratulations, you succeeded But you are hardly original:
Lord love a duck, people. Simmer down. @Michael O, It was a poor choice of words. Had I read that far in your initial post, I'ld've said so myself. But I think the pound of flesh has been had, people, is the remaining gristle so succulent? For your part, Michael, do yourself a favor and drop it, man.
