1. Raven
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    Raven Banned

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    Squirrel goes on rampage

    Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by Raven, Jun 14, 2007.

    An aggressive squirrel attacked and injured three people in a German town before a 72-year-old pensioner dispatched the rampaging animal with his crutch.

    The squirrel first ran into a house in the southern town of Passau, leapt from behind on a 70-year-old woman, and sank its teeth into her hand, a local police spokesman said on Thursday.

    With the squirrel still hanging from her hand, the woman ran onto the street in panic, where she managed to shake it off.

    The animal then entered a building site and jumped on a construction worker, injuring him on the hand and arm, before he managed to fight it off with a measuring pole.

    "After that, the squirrel went into the 72-year-old man's garden and massively attacked him on the arms, hand and thigh," the spokesman said. "Then he killed it with his crutch."

    The spokesman said experts thought the attack may have been linked to the mating season or because the squirrel was ill.
     
  2. Cogito
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    Cogito Former Mod, Retired Supporter Contributor

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    Rambunctious Rodent Runs Rampant!
     
  3. Torana
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    I never knew a squirrel could be so violent!!!
     
  4. Gannon
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    Gannon Contributing Member Contributor

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    Can't crutch by a socio-variant accent for crotch? - now that would be funny!
     
  5. Raven
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    Indeed I think your right......:)
     
  6. Crazy Ivan
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    Creepy Crutcher Kills Capricious Creature!
     
  7. Raven
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    Raven Banned

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    lmao.

    Life has some funny things to share
     
  8. Torana
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    Torana Contributing Member Contributor

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    lmao for sure!
     
  9. Raven
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    Just wait until we reach the gates of heaven. You know what will happen to me Tor. lol
     
  10. Cogito
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    Cogito Former Mod, Retired Supporter Contributor

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    I never knew they'd attack hands. I only knew they gather nuts and berries...
     
  11. Banzai
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    Banzai One-time Mod, but on the road to recovery Contributor

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    Hang on, if the thing was rabid, doesn't that mean that there are now two rabid pensioners (one of whom may or may not have the power to kill with his crotch) and a rabid construction worker on the loose?
     
  12. Gannon
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    Gannon Contributing Member Contributor

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    Sounds like the start to a Danny Boyle film.
     
  13. Cogito
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    Cogito Former Mod, Retired Supporter Contributor

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    Ummm - I think that was with a CRUTCH. At least I bloody well hope so!
     
  14. Torana
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    Torana Contributing Member Contributor

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    ha ha ha ha I will just avoid that one lol
     
  15. Banzai
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    Banzai One-time Mod, but on the road to recovery Contributor

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    Hehe. Bestiality in pensioners :p
     
  16. Crazy Ivan
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    Kinky Killing Connects to Critter Crisis!
     
  17. Cogito
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    Cogito Former Mod, Retired Supporter Contributor

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    Bushy Bandit Bites Back, But Brutally Bludgeoned to Blood and Bones
     
  18. Crazy Ivan
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    Adolescent Author's Attempts At Alliteration Induce Annoyance!

    (Referring to me here, not you.)
     
  19. Godshaped hole
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    Godshaped hole New Member

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    Believe it or not, this actually reached norwegian news as well (not much happening here lately). I must now take the long way to school, I guess. Far away from the park with the evil squirrels:D
     
  20. Banzai
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    Banzai One-time Mod, but on the road to recovery Contributor

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    Wouldn't it make such a cool pet?
     
  21. Crazy Ivan
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    Crazy Ivan Contributing Member

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    "Nice pet!"
    "Thanks, I call him Nutty."
    "He looks a little mangy though..."
    "What did you say?"
    "Er- of course, I didn't mean any-"
    "Kill, Nutty, kill!"
     
  22. Banzai
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    Banzai One-time Mod, but on the road to recovery Contributor

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    I have to get me one of them... :D
     
  23. Eoz Eanj
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    *"Nice pet!"
    "Thanks, I call him Nutty."
    "He looks a little mangy though..."
    "What did you say?"
    "Er- of course, I didn't mean any-"
    "Kill, Nutty, kill!"*

    Call about going 'nuts'

    rofl.
     
  24. Crazy Ivan
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    [​IMG]
     
  25. Banzai
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    Heh. I still thing that the crotch idea is funnier.
     

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