1. Lea`Brooks
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    Lea`Brooks Contributing Member Contributor

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    Struggling with novel intro

    Discussion in 'Plot Development' started by Lea`Brooks, May 28, 2015.

    Hello again. :superhello: Another post about my urban fantasy.. lol

    My novel is based in future America, and creatures of myth have come out of hiding to try and live among humans. Many humans, however, just aren't having it. They believe the creatures are unnatural and dangerous and have locked them into cities to control them until the country as a whole can decide what to do with them.

    A little backstory: My MC's mother was accidentally killed by one. I haven't decided exactly how yet. She was either a doctor treating a creature and was accidentally killed (either by poison blood or the creature lashing out because it was afraid), or she was in one of the creature cities, bringing supplies and support to them when a fight broke out, and she was caught in the crossfire. Her death breaks something in her husband (a politician), making him 100% against the creatures, believing they should all be killed or jailed in tiny cells for the rest of their lives. He's become very bitter and angry, so he tries using his political status to make laws to control the creatures.

    My MC is effected by her mother's death differently than her father. It makes her realize that the creatures really are misunderstood, and it makes her want to help them even more. But because of her father's political stance against them, it's very hard for her to openly oppose her father without ruining his career.

    So my MC seeks out a creature and has his change her into one of them to show her father that they aren't all bad.

    But I don't know how to get there...

    I originally planned to have the creatures start a riot, in which my MC gets separated by her family, chased by a creature, and saved by my second POV character. But that seemed like a cop-out. So then I had her being injured in the riot and changed to save her life by the second POV char. But that seemed like even more of a cop-out. So then I decided that maybe she was given an assignment in her college course, asking her to write a paper on her stance on the creatures, which drives her to find the POV char and interview him many times, drawing them closer until he eventually changes her, per her request. But now that just seems silly....

    Her mother has been dead for some time (maybe 10 years?) so using her death this late in the game wouldn't really work. I need an epiphany moment for my character that makes her realize that yes, now is the time to reach out to the creatures and show my father that he's wrong. But I can't figure out the best strategy. Maybe a new law being put into place? Maybe her father trying to put a new law into place? An important "creature leader" arrest?

    I just don't know. Any suggestions?
     
  2. Masked Mole
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    Masked Mole Contributing Member

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    Perhaps her father's attempts to legislate against these creatures would provoke her curiosity to the point where she would go out in search of them.
    Maybe the creature that killed the MC's mother would track her down to apologize and explain everything. This could show the MC that the creatures have a conscience, and do care about the "normal humans".
    OR (this is pretty weird) the MC finds out that another relative (an uncle or cousin perhaps) is one of these creatures posing as a human.
    Just my two cents. I hope you find a workable solution no matter what.
     
  3. Lea`Brooks
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    Lea`Brooks Contributing Member Contributor

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    Those are all really interesting and could work very well. Thank you! I especially like the first and last one.

    My struggle with the opening is that I need to show the father's character very early because the majority of the book is my MC running from her father. He called the FBI on my second POV when he found out his daughter was changed (it's illegal to change humans). So she's trying to get to this secret location before she dies (long story), all while out-running the feds.

    So it's imperative to show his stance and attitude from the beginning, and a controversial conversation over dinner would be the perfect way to start. Hell, I could even have my MC meet the man who killed her mother during her travels... That'd be interesting.

    Thank you again. :) That was incredibly helpful.
     
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  4. Masked Mole
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    Masked Mole Contributing Member

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    I'm very glad to hear it was helpful. The last time I tried to help someone with his plotting, I ended up feeling like a moron.
    Hope your book goes well.
     
  5. Doc Holiday
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    Doc Holiday New Member

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    I know this isn't what you asked but I have a concern about your premise.

    "creatures of myth have come out of hiding to try and live among humans. Many humans, however, just aren't having it. They believe the creatures are unnatural and dangerous and have locked them into cities to control them until the country as a whole can decide what to do with them."

    This theme has been touched on heavily by Charlaine Harris in the Sookie Stackhouse book series and the Alan Ball HBO show True Blood that was based on her series. Tread carefully and stay original as you delve into this premise lest you waste a lot of time and energy writing something that will get dismissed as a copycat.
     
  6. Lea`Brooks
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    Lea`Brooks Contributing Member Contributor

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    I've never read the book, but I've been informed of the similarities. I pulled it up in Wikipedia though just to get a basic idea of the plot.

    And while the element of creatures making themselves known is similar, it isn't the central conflict of my plot. It's just the setting. I follow one race, which I created, throughout the story and only mention the other creatures as they're seen on the street. If I do a sequel, it will focus on a different race, but still one of my own creation.

    Is that different enough, or am I way off my interpretation of the book?
     
  7. Blighters
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    A couple ideas I had while reading your post. Feel free to disregard them all - just bouncing ideas around :)

    Have you considered the MC having a massive argument with her Father and running away from home? She could stumble upon the mythical creatures almost by chance while struggling to 'live rough'. This would give the chance to show her developing from initial preconceptions (fear etc) into acceptance, trust and a desire to be changed.

    Or a different tack - Get the mother more involved? Perhaps the mother left a diary dictating some incredible experiences with the creatures that the MC is keen to investigate as a way to connect with her mother. Or perhaps when her Mother was killed a family treasure (could be a simple as a necklace etc) was lost. MC goes in search of it and in the process of this comes into contact with the creatures.

    One final idea. Perhaps one of the creatures save's the MC/father but in doing so breaks some law (i.e. leaves the set boundaries they are allowed to live within). The father can't see past this breach of law and has the creature killed. MC is wracked by guilt/shame/sorrow and decides she has to make a change.
     

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