1. Deepak
    Offline

    Deepak New Member

    Joined:
    May 6, 2015
    Messages:
    3
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    India

    Template sentence for "As is... So will..."

    Discussion in 'Word Mechanics' started by Deepak, May 6, 2015.

    How to better frame this sentence:
    "The kind of food we eat attracts the same kind of people in our lives."

    This is an example. Looking a suitable template for these kind of sentences.
    One such usage is "As is the ..... So will be the ...."
    But I am looking for a crisper more accurate template.
     
  2. SethLoki
    Online

    SethLoki Unemployed Autodidact Contributor

    Joined:
    Jan 1, 2011
    Messages:
    596
    Likes Received:
    482
    Location:
    Manchester UK
    Well it's a good template to work from, that framework was used in Genesis I think, "as it was in the beginning so shall it be in the end". That said, I can't quite grasp exactly what you want convey in your sentence. Are you saying that preferences for food match one's preferences for people? An example being liking sweet food and similarly sweet natured people? Or is it more simply a matter of mentioning shared tastes?
     
  3. Lance Schukies
    Offline

    Lance Schukies Active Member

    Joined:
    Apr 1, 2015
    Messages:
    178
    Likes Received:
    39
    if that is the line I would use the qualifier, we are made up of chemicals so the food we eat changes our chemical balance, this can cause us to be attracted to people who eat the same food.

    I don't know if that's what your thing but it how I like to write...
     
  4. Deepak
    Offline

    Deepak New Member

    Joined:
    May 6, 2015
    Messages:
    3
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    India
    Thanks to all for your answers Seth and Lance. Your guess as to the intent of the statement were both correct. I am getting some insights and the topic is opening up for me. But here is another example to better explain what I am looking for.

    "Whatever you focus on, the details of that thing begin to reveal before you."

    So here, the same "thing" is being described with two different constructs. In the first is it 'Whatever', in the second it is 'that thing'. I am doing a translation of a 'Hindi' language sentence and am trying to bring about the same intensity and crispness. The native language provides a direct construct and the sentence formation is very crisp. But English has a different way. Maybe I am stuck with a structure of the native language. The context in which such sentences are being used are to state laws. So the sentence construct is that of stating a law.

    Hope my question is clearer now.
     
  5. Lance Schukies
    Offline

    Lance Schukies Active Member

    Joined:
    Apr 1, 2015
    Messages:
    178
    Likes Received:
    39
    "Whatever you focus on, the details of that thing begin to reveal before you."

    that is pretty clear, I would say translate the words and put it out to some people to give you feedback.

    now that you explained where the original text is from just translate it, the only thing that comes to mind is if it is a cultural differences your test readers will ask for more information.

    I have been meaning to read up on Vedas text.
     
    Deepak likes this.
  6. SethLoki
    Online

    SethLoki Unemployed Autodidact Contributor

    Joined:
    Jan 1, 2011
    Messages:
    596
    Likes Received:
    482
    Location:
    Manchester UK
    Ahh, it's clearer now you mention the backcloth of scripture. I'm not a religious man and feel a bit awkward praising something I disagree with in the round. But in part, the New Testament has a little merit where it contains:

    "Ask, and it will be given to you. Seek, and you will find. Knock, and it will be opened for you. For everyone who asks receives. To him who knocks it will be opened.

    Are these crisp enough?

    :)
     
    Deepak likes this.
  7. Deepak
    Offline

    Deepak New Member

    Joined:
    May 6, 2015
    Messages:
    3
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    India
    @SethLoki: Thanks a lot for that. Though I'll have to modify the style a bit to make it less cryptic. It makes a lot of sense.
    @Lance: Yes. I will be taking feedback from our readers to take care of the cultural differences.
     

Share This Page