1. WDearborn
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    WDearborn New Member

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    The phrase "Luck shone through"

    Discussion in 'General Writing' started by WDearborn, May 20, 2012.

    I'm at finishing the final draft of my novel, and looking back over the previous draft, I circled the phrase "Luck shone through." I'm wondering anyone's thought's on whether this is a cliche or an unoriginal way to say what I'm trying to say. It's a pretty action intensive novel, and I do only use the phrase once. It's a scene where a kid on a bike is pedaling away from the cops. The sentence is:

    "Luck shone through and he saw a thin alleway coming up on his right."

    I'm having a hard time thinking of another way to say it or else I would just change it. But I also overscrutinize my work so do you think this is alright?
     
  2. jo spumoni
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    jo spumoni Active Member

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    I don't think it's cliche, but if you circled it, that probably means it stuck out and detracted from the effect you were trying to get. Anyway, if you dislike it, there are plenty of other ways to put it, the simplest one by far being "fortunately." Another phrase that may be equally cliche is "luck was on his side".
     
  3. mammamaia
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    mammamaia nit-picker-in-chief Contributor

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    that expression makes no sense to me... and i've never heard it said, or read it in over 7 decades of wandering the world, reading, and hearing folks speak, so it's definitely not a cliche... plus, since there were barely 1,000 hits in a google search, including your posts about it, that's pretty solid proof i'm right about that...

    but it could be a regional idiom, since some folks did use it in various writings archived by google... most likely a uk thing...
     
  4. koal4e
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    koal4e Member

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    Yep definately a UK saying. I know this saying from the UK, its like one of those old school sayings your grandparents used to say but you dont hear often now...not very cliche if you ask me and I like that you used it :)
     
  5. Cogito
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    Cogito Former Mod, Retired Supporter Contributor

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    It sounds like something I would expect from the British Isles, particularly Ireland. I think the meaning is clear enough, and it has a folksy air to it. I wouldn't call it cliche. To me it evokes a metaphor of a shaft of sunlight breaking through a cloud to shine on someone.

    You could, of course, reinforce that metaphor in your narrative.
     
  6. Igor
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    Igor Member

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    I wouldn't call it cliche either but it may be a little old-fashioned. This could be what you are looking for though since you ask the question I am guessing that you are not wholly convinced by it yourself. Try alternatives to see if you like them any better. If I had to put a label on it I think it would be quaint.
     
  7. Trilby
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    Trilby Contributing Member Contributor

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    I've never heard it.
     

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