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  1. Snoopingaround
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    Snoopingaround Banned

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    The Versus Thread

    Discussion in 'Writing Prompts' started by Snoopingaround, Dec 16, 2011.

    I thought we should have a little section for battles and contests between characters and types, historical or fictional, real or imaginary. I often wonder about who would prevail in various fights or match ups (like Hulk vs Superman), who is better at detective work between Sherlock Holmes or Detective Poirot, and so on. Questions of this nature excite the competitve juices and creativity of responses. So here we can debate who would win and why, and also this can be good debate practice for making good arguments in general. So, without further ado, I shall present the first match-up:

    Cavemen vs Astronauts.

    The situation is this. There are 5 Cavemen and 5 Astronauts slated to face other on a neutral planet. Each group is comprised of the finest specimens of their type, the Cavemen are strong and robust and savage, the Astronauts are clever, resourceful, and careful. They were abducted by an advanced alien species, who snatched them out of time and placed them into a contest of survival between each other. Victory is attained when one group either subdues or kills the other, when one or the other group is totally wiped out or incapacitated. The landscape they are on is a wilderness type of area. There are wild animals, forests, and mountains. They have to fend for themselves and survive off the land during the contest as well. They have plenty of preparation and planning time. Then they must engage in the hunt and battle each other for domination. Both groups know the stakes are high. The victorious group gets to go home. Who will win, Cavemen or Astronauts???

    (I got this idea from an episode of Star Trek the original series where two groups had to fight each other after being abducted by aliens and also the Cavemen and Astronauts match-up comes from an episode of Angel if I remember correctly).
     
  2. art
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    art Contributing Member Contributor

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    Cavemen win every time.

    Astronauts will be hampered by their modern sensibilities. They will hesitate. Worth reflecting too that they are simply nerds who go to the gym. Hardly the cream.

    Captain Caveman and his crew will not fuck about. Unga Bunga.
     
  3. Alex W
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    Alex W Contributing Member

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    Astronauts win. The cavemen have the edge in being in a more natural enviroment but they aren't the smartest. Astronauts can trap them, create better weapons, avoid harmful wildlife etc.

    "10 soldiers wisely led will beat 100 without a head." (I think that's the quote anyway, either way it's an old Chinese Proverb, or atleast it's almost one)

    What a strange thread this is. Reminds me of that absoloutely ridiculous show I saw once, is it Deadliest Warrior or something like that? Saw it on a show over here where they were taking the mickey out of foreign shows/adverts etc. I couldn't stop laughing, Charlie Brooker presenting the IRA vs the Taliban in a car park?

    F*****g brilliant.
     
  4. Link the Writer
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    Link the Writer Flipping Out For A Good Story. Contributor

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    Astronaut vs. Caveman?

    You'll have to boil it down to this: Who will move faster? The caveman who is, at best, in loincloths and armed with a club, and an astronaut in difficult-to-move outfit with no weapons?

    Yeah, Cro will win better than Mr. Astronaut.

    Cro also wonders how this will end, as sooner or later, someone's gonna say "Ninjas vs. Samurais". Cro thinks this is an odd thread as well. Now, if you'll excuse Cro, he's going to draw the astronaut (depicted as a stick figure with a lone retangle in the middle of the circle head) on Chauvet Cave for a bit. =3

    But seriously, yeah, this is an absurd thread. How are we going to decide who wins? Who will decide the next challengers?
     
  5. Snoopingaround
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    Snoopingaround Banned

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    This is a thought experiment. You run these in your mind in order to draw conclusions from known premises, also using your imagination to explore the possibilities of the situation. You have the freedom to take it wherever you think it should go, and can explore whatever aspect of the thought experiment you believe is important. Some may disagree with you, while others may see the wisdom and logic in your arguments for or against the side you pick. A good debate from someone can change your mind, or you may find that your position is made more solid and correct. That's what makes these hypothetical-type of explorations fun.

    As to the decision of which result is more likely (in this particular case concerning the battle between cavemen and astronauts), that would probably be best determined by majority vote. Generally the majority is correct more often than not, right? That's why we have at least 3 judges or more when deciding various athletic contests in sports, so that there can be a majority decision rendered (such as in boxing, figure skating, etc.). If more judges say that one athlete or performer did a better job than another one, then it is assumed that the majority conclusion is correct, even though there can be alot of subjectivity in these sorts of competitions. Now, obviously we know that not every majority decision is correct, but nonetheless by expressing our own opinions on the matter we can provoke greater insights and stronger arguments from the opposing side. It's thought-provoking, and that is a win-win situation for everyone. On your question of who will decide the next challengers, I would leave that to the forum too. As far as I know, I am not the only one who can come up with juicy match-ups and interesting comparisons for discussion. So I say to anyone who wants to move onto another thought experiment, have at it. We should just let things flow as the discussion progresses.
     
  6. Cacian
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    Cacian Banned

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    At this very moment in time both their position is very similar.
    Both might not have the skills to win because of their initial backgrounds.
    One is an astronaut that comes from a different place presumably something similar to a moon or space planet completely alien to earth.
    a caveman lived in a cave all his life and has n ot wondered out into mountains and the wilderness hence the word cave.
    Both have had ''sheltered'' backgrounds very different from where they are exposed now.
    so my theory is they both lose or win they are at the same level because of their differences and similarities.
    Ultimately they will have to join forces if they have to win or destroy each or themselves if if they don't.
     
  7. VM80
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    VM80 Contributing Member Contributor

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    Cavemen.

    Astronauts are, from what I've seen, not necessarily brutes. The savageness of the typical caveman will therefore come in handy, in such an environment.
     
  8. Pea
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    Pea super pea!

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    Gandalf vs Dumbledore. The fight to end all fights.
     
  9. Link the Writer
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    Link the Writer Flipping Out For A Good Story. Contributor

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    Gandalf.

    Because he defeated a frickin' BALROG! He fought the demon while telling others to run. What did Dumbledor do? Defeat some wizard and had an orphan child do the rest of the fighting for him.
     
  10. James Berkley
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    Depends the astronauts time period and nationality
    Are they modern American, who are less often pulled from the military and may have survival training?
    Or cold war American and they where generally military, had survival training, occasionally weapons training and a machete in their kit?
    Or are they Russian who/are are given weapons training, survival training (in the Russian winter), and pack a gun on their ship?
    Or is it futuristic astronauts? Who knows what they will have for training and what the Russians might decide needs to be packed.
     
  11. mugen shiyo
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    mugen shiyo Contributing Member

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    Astronaut vs Cavemen?

    Depends on the location. If on earth, the astronaunts get pummeled while trying to take off their space suits. In space, the cavemen freeze and suffocate while getting a moon-boot in the balls.

    Gandalf vs Dumbledore?

    Ah...Jeez. No that I think about it, sounds like a tie. I mean...they're almost the same wizard.
     
  12. Alex W
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    Gandalf is by far more powerful, he wins that one hands down i'm afraid.
     
  13. Link the Writer
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    Link the Writer Flipping Out For A Good Story. Contributor

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    Gandalf is not the same as Dumbledore. Why? It's a spoiler, but...

    When Gandalf...um...was ''detained'' by the Balrog, he eventually came back and was one of the leading officers of the War for Middle Earth.

    Did Dumbledore do any of this? No. No, he did not.
     
  14. Raki
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    I call a draw. The local wildlife of this alien planet turns out to be too much, and a six-legged, Avatar kitty-dog hybrid thing eats all the contestants and no one goes home. :(
     
  15. Snoopingaround
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    ^Hehe, that is a fair conclusion to draw as well. The chance of some random beast attacking them is fairly high in this scenario, and both groups could lose members due to being eaten. However, one should keep in mind that the cavemen are well versed in fighting against large beasts, or at least would be able to put up strong resistance against them. Even the astronauts should be able to put up a solid defense against any predatory animals. Astronauts in this scenario are what I would call "fine specimens" and I shall clarify what I mean by that. They would be considered exceptional by the standards of the "common" astronaut. Obviously, almost by definition an astronaut is by no means common, as the profession itself demands a high performance bar that most people would probably not be able to meet. So these 5 would be the 'creme de la creme' of the astronaut program. They would be athletically fit, though not at an olympic level, 3 out of 5 should be able to run a full marathon with good times. They would also be extremely competent and resourceful when faced with unfamiliar or emergency situations. The cavemen group would also be "fine specimens", the most representative individuals of the physical strength, hunting prowess, and aggressiveness of the caveman type. Their alpha male could be the alpha male of a confederation of tribes, rather than just one tribe (so he would be like an alpha male's alpha male for example). All 5 of the cavemen would be able to run a full marathon with excellent times, carrying a baby deer on their backs in addition to that. I think that one should not underestimate the cunning of the cavemen as well. They were not complete dunces. Even though the astronauts have them dominated in brainpower, and in planning ahead and in uses of strategy, it is not totally inconceivable that the cavemen might fool the astronauts in some way (such as luring them into an ambush). And yes, in response to an earlier poster, these astronauts do have extensive wilderness survival training.
     
  16. RusticOnion
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    Under the Cavemen vs Astronaut senario it would really boil down to the enviroment.

    What resources are avaliable? If it's a desert planet I think the Cavemen would have a higher chance of victory. That being said it would also depend on the kind of Cavemen/Astronaut groups, because there are many variances, such as:

    How advanced are the Cavemen exactly? Can they communicate effectively?

    I'm not an expert on this but I'm pretty sure there are different kinds of astronaut jobs that lead to that title, typically Astronauts are physically fit and healthy aswell as intelligent
     
  17. Fullmetal Xeno
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    Fullmetal Xeno Protector of Literature Contributor

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    Chuck Norris VS. Morgan Freeman. It's going to be the ultimate battle of awesomeness!
     
  18. Snoopingaround
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    Snoopingaround Banned

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    Chuck Norris. This one is obvious. It is like an unspoken rule that whenever you have any kind of versus situations, and Chuck Norris is involved, then Chuck Norris will always be the winner. It is the Chuck Norris law. This is why we never, ever, ever, match up Chuck Norris against Chuck Norris. To do so creates a black hole paradox which can destroy the known universe. So please guys, for the love of goodness, let us not match up Chuck Norris against himself on here. I am looking forward to seeing Christmas this year.
     
  19. jnk1296
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    I won't, for the sake of humanity and life as we know it, but your post really tempts me to do otherwise, Snoopingaround. :D
     
  20. Fullmetal Xeno
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    Fullmetal Xeno Protector of Literature Contributor

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    But don't you know Morgan Freeman is the black version of Chuck Norris! lol (no racial pun intended)
     
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