1. yellowm&M
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    yellowm&M Contributing Member Contributor

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    To tolo or not to tolo? That is the question

    Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by yellowm&M, Jan 25, 2010.

    So this would actually be my second time asking for tolo related advice...proving to me how completely ridiculous this all is haha

    In about 2 weeks is my school's tolo dance. A group of my friends have decided they really want to go and apparently that means that I too have to go. My main problem so far has been i don't have anyone I would like to ask. Then last friday i ran into a friend of mine from this summer and my mom suggested I ask him; but by the time i went to find him again he was gone. I've since been asking people who know him for his number so that I can ask him but have hit a dead end with that so far. Then last night my friends called me telling me they needed to know right then whether or not I'm going to tolo because they need to make dinner and apparently limo (why do we need a limo?? it's informal!) reservations when they know that part of my decisions hinges on when/if i can get ahold of this friend of mine and what he says. They then told me that they need to know by wednesday if I'm going. So thats the background stuff


    Here's my problem, I don't even know if i want to go. The friend I've contemplated asking is homeschooled which means (if he says yes) I have to go through getting all the papers and stuff for a date from a different school, which i already had to do for homecoming...and it was a huge pain and I don't look forwards to going through again. Also while I think it could be fun I'm stressing over finding someone to ask then having the money for tickets, food, limo, pictures, and everything else for something i didn't really want to go in the first place. I know that dances really can be incredibly fun, and the group i would theoretically go with (provided that they don't throw me out first because heaven forbid I haven't gotten a date fast enough for the dance they want me to go to) would be really fun and I think I would have fun with my friend, providing of course that he says yes and all that. However I keep switching between wanting to go and not wanting to go and I feel quite evenly torn.

    So I suppose what I'm asking is, were you in my place, what would you do?
     
  2. hiddennovelist
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    hiddennovelist Contributing Member Contributor

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    Well...if you're struggling this much with trying to decide whether or not you want to go, if I were in your situation, I don't think I would go. It's nice having these happy memories from high school, but I've gone to dances I wanted to go to, and I've gone to dances that I was indifferent about or just didn't really want to go, and I have to say that looking back, I really wish I had just stayed home from the latter.
     
  3. mammamaia
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    mammamaia nit-picker-in-chief Contributor

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    what the heck is 'tolo'???
     
  4. hiddennovelist
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    hiddennovelist Contributing Member Contributor

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    It's a girl ask guy dance at school.
     
  5. yellowm&M
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    yellowm&M Contributing Member Contributor

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    oh yeah i probably should have said that
     
  6. rory
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    rory Contributing Member

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    Were I in your place, I would not go. But this is coming from the girl who skipped out on her graduation ceremony/prom/whatever you want to call it. I suffered from a school spirit deficiency throughout my high school days...
     
  7. mammamaia
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    mammamaia nit-picker-in-chief Contributor

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    we called those 'sadie hawkins' dances back in the old days... what does tolo stand for?
     
  8. SonnehLee
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    SonnehLee Contributing Member Contributor

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    I thought they were Sadie Hawkins dances too...
     
  9. Cogito
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    Cogito Former Mod, Retired Supporter Contributor

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    I had never heard the term "tolo" before either. I just googled it, and it appears to be a regional term. A Wikipedia aricle claims it is from Chinook Jargon, meaning to earn or to win. Other google hits use the same definition verbatim, but I have yet to find a more reliable, primary source. So take the etymology with a grain of salt.
     
  10. NaCl
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    NaCl Contributing Member Contributor

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    Blasphemy...we're losing the Sadie Hawkins label...poor Sadie...all she ever really wanted was Li'l Abner...or any man, for that matter! LOL
     
  11. yellowm&M
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    yellowm&M Contributing Member Contributor

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    I have no clue what tolo stands for

    Its still called Sadie Hawkins dance also
    Like Cog said I think it might be a reginonal term. Out where I am everyone calls it tolo, but I also know lots of people who call it Sadie Hawkin. It's the same thing regardless.
     
  12. Gigi_GNR
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    Gigi_GNR Guys, come on. WAFFLE-O. Contributor

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    A little twin advice: Dances are supposed to be fun, and filling out all those forms for a date is the exact opposite. If you don't think you're going to have fun, don't go. I've been to dances where I was skeptical of even going, and they ended up not being fun. You can hang out with friends or find an even cooler thing to do that night if you'd rather not go.

    I'd go with you if I could, even though I'm your twin sister--we'd twin it up! :D
     
  13. yellowm&M
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    yellowm&M Contributing Member Contributor

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    haha thanks twin/co-dictator
    honesly I wish I could ask people from here to go with me (like my twin :D) that would be insanely fun right there

    I keep switching decisions...but I think i'm going to go with no, I just don't think it's worth it to go through all the crap it's already been
    though most of my friends are going so I can't really get a group together to chill with instead

    *sigh*
    high school is such a pain
     
  14. Gigi_GNR
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    Gigi_GNR Guys, come on. WAFFLE-O. Contributor

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    It is, isn't it? *sigh*


    :D
     
  15. yellowm&M
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    yellowm&M Contributing Member Contributor

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    and I've still got two years to go....

    *sigh*

    haha
    man I wish I could just hang out with my twin on tolo
     
  16. Sabreur
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    Sabreur Contributing Member Contributor

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    Dances blow, never go to them. The only reason I go is because I enjoy pain. ;)

    Seriously, if you're certain you'll have no fun, don't go!
     
  17. mammamaia
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    mammamaia nit-picker-in-chief Contributor

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    filling out what forms!??

    when we went to dances, we just went!
     
  18. Cogito
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    Cogito Former Mod, Retired Supporter Contributor

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    What is it, a lawyers' dance? :D
     
  19. yellowm&M
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    yellowm&M Contributing Member Contributor

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    if you want to go with/take someone who doesn't go to the school you have to fill out a form for them to attend

    however this has now become irrelevent because the choice has now officially been taken from me
     
  20. Sabreur
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    Sabreur Contributing Member Contributor

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    Standard practice in America it seems. At my high school prom, if you wanted to take someone not in the district you attended, there were forms to sign and all that.
     
  21. mammamaia
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    mammamaia nit-picker-in-chief Contributor

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    not back in my day! [the mid 50s]

    we just came with a date and that was it... nobody was checking id... and we didn't have any school id, anyway... of course, there were only 60 in my graduating class and k-8 grades were in an adjacent building...

    in fact, second graders on the floor above my typing class put some of my fellow second year french students to shame, when we could hear them reciting their french lessons!
     
  22. Cogito
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    Cogito Former Mod, Retired Supporter Contributor

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    The only things they cheched for in my school were flasks and smokable materials. But the teachers knew every student by sight anyway.
     
  23. hiddennovelist
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    hiddennovelist Contributing Member Contributor

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    Are your friends making you go?
     
  24. yellowm&M
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    yellowm&M Contributing Member Contributor

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    no actually

    my friend thought i had decided not to go (when I had actually almost decided on asking someone the next day) and she made reservations for the group not including me or anyone I would bring. So I can't go in that group which is all my friends that are going.

    So yeah...it doesn't bug me too much since I was close to deciding no anyways...but it's irritating to have my choice taken from me.
     
  25. hiddennovelist
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    hiddennovelist Contributing Member Contributor

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    Yeah, that stinks.

    Well, not-so-greatness of the situation aside, though, I'm glad you won't have to stress over it anymore.
     

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