1. nzbeatman
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    nzbeatman New Member

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    Unusual double/2in1 sentence structure

    Discussion in 'Writing Prompts' started by nzbeatman, Sep 23, 2010.

    (This is kind of a word game, but also just about the structure of language- so I've put it in general forum- feel free to move!)

    Hi there,
    I've been having ideas about writing with multiple meanings and the like; ways of having two meanings in bedded within a seemingly single sentence/structure. It gets a bit confusing, and I am really struggling to come up with much of use (my literature skills have never been that good). Anyway I was wondering if anyone might like to take up the challenge and have a go at making one!

    So basically, trying to make sentences which can be read in three ways-
    1st- by reading it normally, in its entirety;
    2nd- by reading every second word, beginning with the first word;
    3rd- by reading every second word, beginning with the second word.


    Here are two really bad examples, which almost work (but don't actually):


    "Go (get) on (it) in (style), I (almost) said"

    (1st- go get on it in style, I almost said)
    (2nd- go on in I said)
    (3rd- get it style, almost) <-fail!


    Perhaps it would be easier to do the same, but work in clumps of two's?

    e.g.
    "what about (if we) hate; i (do this) for one"


    As you can see, I am really struggling at coming up with any sensical examples! It is likely that there is some sort of formula which could be devised, with patterns of nouns and verbs etc etc but again my knowledge of english and literature fall short of such word-mastery!

    If you have the time/interest to have a go, I'd love to see if anyone can make some fully-functional ones! :)
     
  2. art
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    art Contributing Member Contributor

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    Jim's morbid obesity viciously constrained bedroom fun.

    A rather clunky example that just about works. You can probably throw together reams of this sort of stuff - simply qualifying nouns and verbs - but there's very limited merit in it.

    Trying to get the every-other-word sentence to say something different to, or to subvert the very meaning of, the standard sentence, would be very difficult, I think.
     
  3. Thanshin
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    Thanshin Active Member

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  4. nzbeatman
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    nzbeatman New Member

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    Yep not bad! Except only two of the ways of reading it make any sort of sense. The third- "morbid viciously bedroom" -is of no sense at all. But yes the resounding point here is it is incredibly difficult isn't it! I'm hoping to find some sort of Stephen Hawkings equivelent, for english/literature ;)
     
  5. stubeard
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    stubeard Active Member

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    The red girl’s bag went in very shocking, unnatural positions.

    The red part is perhaps more of a tabload newspaper headline.

    Also a bit risque. I seriously didn't mean it to!!

    EDIT: Damn I've just realised you need to remove an apostrophe to make the black sentence work.
     
  6. jo spumoni
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    jo spumoni Active Member

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    The silent silver leaves tumbled and soft morning rain fell.

    Silent leaves and morning fell.
    The silver tumbled soft rain.

    I don't really know what the second one means...but it has a subject and a predicate, so I call it even. Difficult challenge!
     

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