And give yourself a score out of ten if you feel like it. Dancing (4/10): I'm really bad at dancing. Even in England, where everybody's pretty bad, I was a conspicuously poor dancer, but in South America I'm deep into laughable territory. Having a sense of direction (3/10): My mum used to walk or drive me to school every day, but when I was nine or ten she decided it was time for me to get there and back myself. The first time I tried coming home on my own, on a journey I had made literally hundreds of times before, I got lost. I am ashamed to admit that my sense of direction hasn't improved since. Drawing (2/10): Jesus, I draw like a four-year-old child on his fifth pint of Stella. It beggars belief, just how terrible I am at drawing things. Come on you lot: 'fess up.