1. Ohrenberg

    Ohrenberg New Member

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    Would you want to know more about this book? Or would you read it?

    Discussion in 'Plot Development' started by Ohrenberg, May 25, 2013.

    I thought of this story the other night and have been working on it. I know my grammar and I've always believed it's been my "life's purpose" to write novels, but I've never believed in myself enough to go after it. Please read this limited description and tell me if you would buy/download/read this book if you saw it on the back of the book in a store. My husband tells me it's amazing (I've told him the ending and deep meaning hidden within each chapter), but I want an unbiased view. All CONSTRUCTIVE criticism is welcomed. Please know that the twisted ending is, in my opinion, incredibly good and unique. It gives the entire reason and meaning to the entire book up to this point. Thank you for reading.

    The main character wakes up every day in a new place. It's what he's known for as long as he can remember. He has no family, no friends, and no way to keep either one if he were to get some. Some days he wakes up in a real place: The streets of Italy, a creepy alleyway in London, a desolate, snowy town that seems to be too perfect. Sometimes, however, he wakes up in a completely imaginary place that seems to be something that comes straight from the pages of an imaginary book.The main character has no real purpose or reason for being, but after he falls completely in love with a girl he meets one day, he yearns to wake up in a place close to where he left her so he can see her again. He sets his mission everyday to get back to her, knowing that the next day she will not be with him and she will not remember who he is or that she met him. Towards the end of the story the reader finds out the truth: A truth that brings reality and fiction together in a turning twist that will encapsulate the reader and bring a shock to all who read.
     
  2. Garball

    Garball Banned Contributor

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    As long as it is not one of those straight twists. I can't stand a twist without a bend or curve.;)
     
  3. GingerCoffee

    GingerCoffee Web Surfer Girl Contributor

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    Would you want to know more about this book? Or would you read it?

    Yes, but, it would have to be done right. I might get bored if the story went on and on until the end. So the different days would need something more than 'a new day' to keep me from getting tired and skipping to the end.
     
  4. b3av3r

    b3av3r Member

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    It seems like an interesting concept but it would need to be stitched together properly. My immediate questions are how/why he is waking up in new places? and what does he do for money/food/shelter/etc.? If you answered these questions adequately throughout the story, along with a good plot, then I think you would have me engaged.
     
  5. Fullmetal Xeno

    Fullmetal Xeno Protector of Literature Contributor

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    Needs more explanation. Needs more reason why he fell in love with her. Otherwise it feels empty.
     
  6. Fullmetal Xeno

    Fullmetal Xeno Protector of Literature Contributor

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    Needs more explanation. Needs more reason why he fell in love with her. Otherwise it feels empty.
     
  7. Thomas Kitchen

    Thomas Kitchen Proofreader in the Making Contributor

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    It kind of reminds me of The Time Traveller's Wife. It's an interesting premise you've got there. I know this isn't going to be your final blurb, but try to make it grab the reader from the get-go. :)
     
  8. Xatron

    Xatron New Member

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    That's what I thought when I read it too!!!

    It sounds interesting and I would check it out if the description was something like that.
     
  9. lettuce head

    lettuce head Active Member

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    I think it is a brilliant concept. There are many places you could go with that. You have to do it.
     
  10. blackstar21595

    blackstar21595 New Member

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    Write it. Concepts don't matter. What matters is the writing. I read a short story about a boy who fishes and I loved it more than a lot more "complex" plots I've read.Reason being because it was well written.
     
  11. mammamaia

    mammamaia nit-picker-in-chief Contributor

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    ditto that!

    nit-picky me has to also wonder how he'd get food and where would he sleep every night?

    plus, it's totally unrealistic to have him fall 'completely in love' over the course of a single day...

    and, finally, i'd love to see something that can 'encapsulate' a reader! ;)
     
  12. EdFromNY

    EdFromNY Hope to improve with age Supporter Contributor

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    Totally agree with blackstar and maia.

    Sounds to me as if you lack confidence in your idea and are looking to others to validate it. Don't worry about it. Someone once came up with an idea for a story about a poor fisherman who hasn't caught anything for months. His neighbors think he's cursed. He goes out and hooks a big fish, but loses it. Next day, he goes out again. Doesn't sound like much, but few stories have ever caught my imagination more fully. So much so, I quote it below.

    Write it. At the same time, don't be afraid to find things wrong with it. Nothing is perfect the first time around. Developing your writing skills takes time (I'm almost 60 and I'm still learning). Write a lot. Read a lot.

    Best of luck.
     
  13. Mckk

    Mckk Member Supporter Contributor

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    The premise definitely sounds interesting and I'd wanna find out more if I saw it in a store, sure. Reminded me of 50 First Dates actually, the idea of the girl not remembering you after one day.

    I see a potential plot flaw/hole though - how did this guy come into existence? And how did he come to be transported to a new place everyday? It's all he's ever known - this means it's been this way for as long as he can remember. Unless he has amnesia conveniently from the age of 16, 17 or so, it means he's been this way since he was born.

    How would a tiny baby survive without a mother, or at least a friend, to feed him and look after him? He would've died long before your story could've taken place. And of course, if a baby is born, then there is a mother (and a father). Has her memory of her son simply been wiped?

    If you have a good explanation for these questions, then it could work, but don't start without the answers to these questions.
     
  14. jazzabel

    jazzabel Agent Provocateur Contributor

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    (double post)
     
  15. jazzabel

    jazzabel Agent Provocateur Contributor

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    It's a surreal concept, and surrealism in a novel can either work amazingly well, like in Murakami's Wind-up Bird Chronicle, or it can fail miserably due to being too abstract, boring, derivative.

    If you are an excellent writer, and know how to draw the reader in with realistic content, so they can fully enjoy the surreal elements, symbolism etc, then it would make for a great book. But based on your description, if I saw it in a store and it was from a new writer, I would probably not pick it up until I knew for sure the writing was good.
     
  16. Cogito

    Cogito Former Mod, Retired Supporter Contributor

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    First, critique is not appropriate in this part of the sitem and ythe rule do not permit posting here to seek critique,

    As has been said, a concept means nothing. It's what you do with it. From the paragraph you offered, I was not particularly moved.
     
  17. heal41hp

    heal41hp Active Member

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    The Time Traveller's Wife and 50 First Dates also popped into my head! High-fives and/or fist-bumps for Thomas Kitchen, Xatron, and Mckk (your choice :D). I also have to say that EdFromNY is my hero. I adore The Old Man and the Sea. It shifted my paradigm.

    Anyway... Knowing nothing more than what's been presented here, I would absolutely pick up the book and read it. I'd want to see how it's done and if it's been pulled off (also if questions are answered because there's some crazy stuff mentioned).
     
  18. ProsonicLive

    ProsonicLive New Member

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    same here. IDK what to think on the premise alone. There are a lot of books that had GREAT premises and HORRIBLE reading experiences. IE "your heart belongs to me" by Dean Koontz. I literally threw the book and vented my rage with a gears of war marathon, imagining each grub was Dean himself. so, it can go both ways.
     
  19. PyrZern

    PyrZern Member

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    I think you have a nice idea there. Which is good, a good book deserves a good story.
    Now you have to write it, and make it good.

    To answer your question; yes, I want to know more. And maybe, I will read it if you make it good.
     

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