1. Daydream_believer96

    Daydream_believer96 New Member

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    Would anyone who's into this kind of genre be interested?

    Discussion in 'Children's & Young Adult' started by Daydream_believer96, Sep 15, 2016.

    Hi all :)
    So I've started planning my first novel with an idea that I really like (I've attempted a few in the past but didn't like them) and I'm just looking to get a few opinions. I decided to use the "snowflake" method and I'm currently on step 2 which is:

    1. Take another hour to expand the sentence into a paragraph.
    · Should include story setup, major disasters and ending.
    · Try to include 3 major disasters and the ending (the set up and occurrence of each one should take up a quarter of the book.)
    · Ideally about 5 sentences; one for background, one for each disaster and one for ending.

    My plan is:

    Setup/background: main character, 2nd uni year, bad luck with guys, constantly gets screwed over, fed up.
    Major disaster 1: Things go wrong with the “perfect” guy.
    Major disaster 2: Argument with housemates when she hears them talking about her – only fuels her screwing around with guys as she thinks she can’t trust her friends.
    Major disaster 3: Hurts housemate who’s been in love with her since the start of uni.
    Ending: Starts to build things up with housemate.

    And my actual paragraph is:
    A second year university student thinks she’s finally met the man of her dreams when he ends up hurting her just like all the others. Hurt and fed up with being screwed over, she decides to reverse the roles and do some “screwing over” herself by using and abusing any male that she comes across. After overhearing a discussion between her housemates about her “lifestyle” and thinking there’s no one she can trust anymore, she goes even further off the rails. Things reach boiling point when she ends up unknowingly hurting the person who cares about her the most. With his help she learns to trust again and starts to build a healthy relationship.

    Just wondering what people think and if from what I've written, anyone would be interested in a story like that? Open to comments and constructive criticism :)

    Thanks
    Daydream_believer96
     
  2. Lea`Brooks

    Lea`Brooks Contributor Contributor

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    First, welcome. :) I see this is your first post, so I suggest heading over to the New Members area to introduce yourself. Also, make sure you take a look at the rules of the forum.

    Second, you tagged this as Young Adult, which this story definitely isn't. YA novels typically include characters younger than the age of 18 (though not always) and include themes of coming of age, first kiss, first relationships. Since your characters are in college and are delving into deeper matters of sex and relationships and where they fit into the world, I'd classify this as New Adult. It's a group that hasn't quite picked up stream yet, but I think you'd have a difficult time selling this as YA to a publisher.

    Third, I think you have a solid storyline built up, but there's nothing interesting about it. It's the same type of story that's been done a thousand times, both in novels and in television and movies. You need to figure out some way to make this story different. Why should I choose this one over the dozens of others that are already out there?

    Overall, it seems you have a good starting point. But you need to punch up the wow factor a bit.

    Good luck. :)
     
  3. big soft moose

    big soft moose An Admoostrator Admin Staff Supporter Contributor Community Volunteer

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    I agree its essentially a cut down version of Freshers by Kevin Sampson - and lots of other similar stuff - whats new, exciting, different about your idea that differentiates it from the adventures of Kit and his compardres

    Also screwing arround isnt a disaster - its situation normal at uni , as is shit going wrong with partners (the perfect guy/girl doesnt exist btw)

    IMO you need hurts housemate ... then major disaster which becomes the means for her and housemate getting together .. e.g does one of her parent die, does she run out of money, lose her job, get diagnosed with XYZ, nearly get kicked off her course, get kidnaped by a serial killer alien called oswald (okay probably not the last one), which enables the relisation that housemate has been there for her / rescued her / helped her ... thus leading to them getting together

    I'd also advise kicking the planning template into touch , whereever you got that from - writing isnt something that canbe done on a template basis
     
    Last edited: Sep 15, 2016
  4. Lea`Brooks

    Lea`Brooks Contributor Contributor

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    I don't think that's necessarily true. Templates can be a great tool, especially for beginners. I started using the Snowflake Method and found it extremely useful. It helped me to learn what's important, what's not, and how to frame a story properly. Granted, I've since moved on from it and found my own outlining process. But it's still a good place to start until you find your own process.
     
  5. Daydream_believer96

    Daydream_believer96 New Member

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    Okay thank you both for your help :)
     
  6. big soft moose

    big soft moose An Admoostrator Admin Staff Supporter Contributor Community Volunteer

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    The problem is that applied blindly it stifles the story - "each story must have a start, 3 disasters/conflicts each of which take up a quarter of the book , leaving 25% for beginning and end" ... nope, that's over simplistic bollocks , some stories might only have one disaster, some might have 10 or more, some might have multiple plots lines each with their own conflicts and resolutions.

    Plus not every conflict is equal so 25% of the book per conflict is rubbish as well.

    Personally I tend to pants so my outlining is pretty basic, but if you are an outliner/planner then tell your story the way you want to tell it, don't try to ram a square peg into the round hole created by someonelse's method
     

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