So I am not sure if this will be moved to the RPG section but here is my pitch. You can join in and have fun with my character named Albert Shipley, a married advertising consultant. Albert wakes up late because his house was struck by lightning during a thunderstorm and lost power to his alarm He gets on the train to go to work and found himself facing a pregnant woman whose water just broke, instead of getting off at the next stop. He helps deliever the baby but was later for work after being 45 min late for a presentation to prospective Japanese customers. he was disallowed to make his presentation and was consequently fired. He leaves the building and goes to a bar to drink his sorrows away and ran into a pretty woman who he eventually followed home. As they were having sex (with her on top of him), a stray bullet rips through her torso. Covered in blood, he tried to excape the building but got stock in the elevator with his shoes in hand a bloody shirt on. What happens to him next? (this is where you come in)
A voice came over the intercom asking if he was okay, it was a cop. So he decided to climb out through the top. After he made it through the hatch the elevator started to move again. It stalled between the 19th and 20th floor. He could see the landing, so he reached out and pulled himself up. He was halfway through when it he heard the grinding gears shift.
He moves into the shaft where he meets Bruce Willis who kindly informs him of a terrorist situation occurring three floors above. He bitchslaps Bruce and tells him to get a hold of himself, but they combine their forces to fight the mystery shooter and the terrorists upstairs.
As the last terrorist fell to his death from the epic gun fight that just occurred Bruce Willis and Albert gave each other a high five. Suddenly Bruce collapses to his knees for a dart was shot in to the back his neck. "There's a mystery blow dart shooter too!?" Albert exclaimed. Through the ceiling a man jumped down and swung his sword at Albert, but Albert was fast and had reflexes like a mongoose. Unfortunately his pinky finger got chopped off.
With blood spewing forth as though his pinky finger had become some sort of high powered water gun, Albert, despite being altered by a lethal combination of shock and adrenaline, took careful aim at his attackers face. His aim true, and his attacker now blinded, Albert unleashed a powerful front kick to the groin of his assailant whose eyes were now filled with blood and gore. Suddenly taken over by a wave of panic, Albert fled down the nearest hallway shouting, "Help me Tom Cruise......SAVE ME WITH YOUR WITCHCRAFT!"
And Tom Cruise heard the cries like the shining as he lay in his bedroom watching an imitation porn film of himself and Nicole Kidman in happier times. Fumbling around the bed, he jumped up, putting on his latest and greatest batsuit as he looked proudly out the window as if on a mission.