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  1. Here is a piece that is more dark and melancholy, than the previous. Overall this one is just plain evil (hahaha). Nothing serious, but I was just exploring my boundaries and seeing what would come to mind. Some of the music I listen to is dark and heavy hip-hop, but the reason for it is because of the lyrical content. Once again its nothing serious, but I would like to have some constructive criticism on this one also:

    Ive thought what if I were goto Great Falls intoxicated
    its been debated these thoughts are most often situated
    not complicated cause then it would work out
    my inner communication is thorough and often thought out
    i like to wonder in labyrinths of thoughts in my spare time
    whats drugs I abuse and what if I committed a crime
    no need for Sublime but the music can be soothing
    walking a tight rope living life and taking death can be confusing
    all my life i feel like im too disassociated
    and I need to open up but anxiety holds my tounge
    but now im just a dislocated shoulder waiting to be
    popped back in but where to begin cause if it happens once
    it will surely happen again
    I wonder if I died would it bring a tear to my friends eyes
    I pay dues for my selfishness and my selfish lies
    never thought i would think this but I wanna die
    it would save me from the descison of advancing
    and leaving others behind
    but if i slit my wrist i can goto hell
    and getting on death row will put im in a jail cell
    the vicious cycle called life is filled with disgust
    thats why i need my green laced with that angel dust
    getting wet will keep me distant from the mind
    my body will do the same so the spirt is delusional and devine
    keep the thoughts locked in the bottle but sparingly release
    to keep the peace within beast cause my heart creeks
    with veins that pump nothing but rhythm
    cause the black in me is hate jus call it racism
    but the truth lays within the heart to be specific
    i can speak in the devils tounge jus with the change of lyric...
  2. I know I need some work on my wordplay and metaphors, but I wanna know what else would help make me a better lyricist. Here is one of my several works that I have written in my spare time. There is no definite subject behind the verse. Let me know what I should do next time I feel the need to write:

    We make moves faster than the hour glass
    every second that ticks and the hours that pass
    my intelect grows stronger everytime that we cross paths
    and when we do that, you continue to fail
    constantly frail, you break faster than weak minds in jail
    now lets not forget that you messing with the best
    no bullet proof, cause violence does not measure my success
    I wanna be remembered like Tupac Biggie
    but I dont wanna known as them, cause my name is Ricky
    and I quick-ly deteriorate minds of the weak
    once I infect the first I manifest become stronger and seek
    out the niggas that plaque the fans with nonsense
    but what these dudes do not know is there in my territory
    and my game is non-sense
    no accomplice
    to murder, cause I got you watchin ya ass like Good Burger
    you flip burgers to get studio time
    education is key and im rocking the lanyard, so I got mine
    its like the Pharcyde, time is passing me by
    niggas kill and deceive one another and im asking why
    do we continue to commit suicidal genocide
    but when we ask for reperations they said no, we said why?
    'cause we constantly bad choices
    that result in niggas being picked up by coroners in hoisters
    but it seems like were the glitch in the system
    .....we called the Obama Geek Squad to come and fix them